where I channel my inner Wonkette, British Tabloids or Drudge to make claims loosely based on facts.
- Germany Pushes U.S. Closer to War Against Iran- Fox News is reporting that U.S. officials have begun to formulate plans for the bombing of Iran as well as other potential military scenarios in that country. And somehow this is Germany's fault.
- Russia Prepares for Return of the Soviet Union With Massive Bomb!- Vladimir Putin dissolved his government in an attempt to pick his "successor" before parliamentary and presidential elections next year. (Don't worry: he's not going to step down.Ever.) Russia did test the "world's most powerful vacuum bomb, which unleashes a destructive shockwave with the power of a nuclear blast, the military said on Tuesday, dubbing it the "father of all bombs"."
- Belgium to Be Divided!- Or at least the Economist says they should. And others agree. I have no problem with it.
- Giuliani Campaign in Last Days!-Recent polls show that Rudy Giuliani's support is falling from 37%-28% and is trailing in the crucial states of Iowa, New Hampshire and South Carolina
- Barack Obama Hates Israel!- One of Barack's advisors Zbigniew Brzezinski, former S.O.S. wrote an essay defending a recent book that criticized the power and influence of the "Israel Lobby" in American policy discussions.
- John Edwards Wins Texas!- Future President John Edwards convincingly won an "e-primary" voted on by 8,000 Texas Democrats. He won 38% of the vote to Barack's 21% and Hillary's 20%. (Proving that he is the only democrat who could win Texas. Obviously)
- Cuban Minister: Castro Not Dying!- "Cuban Culture Minister Abel Prieto said on Wednesday that Fidel Castro is not at death's door and rumors in Miami of his demise are wishful thinking." Which of course means Fidel Castro is dying- you can't trust a communist. It's Propaganda people.
- Pirates Infiltrate Phillipine Government!- An anti-corruption court has convicted a former president and found him guilty of plunder. Plunder!
- Johnny Rotten: American Will Become A Fascist State and Obama is Dumb!- In an interview with Spinner Magazine (found on Wonkette) in response to a comment that it can't get worse after Bush John Lydon, formerly of the Sex Pistols and Public Image LTD. replied "You want to bet? World War I Germany thought that and it ended up in World War II with Hitler." He did say, however that "Obama's dense as a doorbell, not much going on up there, it's a wooden top."
- "Liberals Smarter than Conservatives" Study Shows!- A NYU/UCLA study shows that. (it's science!) Or at least that their brains are wired differently and liberals are more open to change and ambiguous thinking and new ideas and experiences, whereas conservatives tend to be more "structured and persistent in their judgments." But we knew that already.
wow that was actually fun. i should get into hysterics more often. Sphere: Related Content
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