Thursday, January 31, 2008


at some point in my life I really want to do this

The Louvre in 9:43 from Godard's Bande à part

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Songs I’ve Been Singing Today

I’ve been on a bit “diva”tastic mood especially with this song, which I hadn’t thought about seriously in like a decade

Whitney Houston- I Have Nothing

Crowded House- Don’t Dream It’s Over

There is freedom within, there is freedom without
Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
There's a battle ahead, many battles are lost
But you'll never see the end of the road
While you're travelling with me

Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won't win

Now I'm towing my car, there's a hole in the roof
My possessions are causing me suspicion but there's no proof
In the paper today tales of war and of waste
But you turn right over to the T.V. page

Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won't win

Now I'm walking again to the beat of a drum
And I'm counting the steps to the door of your heart
Only shadows ahead barely clearing the roof
Get to know the feeling of liberation and release

Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won't win

Don't let them win

(Hey now, hey now)

(that was for John really)

and Panic by The Smiths
Burn down the disco
Hang the blessed DJ
Because the music that they constantly play
It says nothing to me about my life
Hang the blessed DJ
Because the music they constantly play

(the video featured ever so quickly in Shaun of the Dead)

Whitney Houston- I Have Nothing [download]
Crowded House- Don’t Dream It’s Over [download]
The Smiths-Panic [download]
Pete Yorn-Panic [download]

Hang the DJ, Hang the DJ, Hang the DJ,
Hang the DJ, Hang the DJ

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Fun with Racism: The Racist Onion

doesn't like to be browned.

I’ve been meaning to do this for a while but today’s offering from The ONN seemed like a sign.
Because really nobody does racism more hilariously than the Onion

Today’s video that reminded me of this deal was
Live From Congress: Representative Wants To Rid Congress Of Gang Members
Congressman Porter (R-IN) urges immediate action against the gang members that have infiltrated our neighborhoods, our schools, and even the Capitol.

Live From Congress: Representative Wants To Rid Congress Of Gang Members

which reminded me of a recent report
Condoleezza Rice To Voyage East
The State Department releases details of Rice's upcoming diplomatic journey:

Condoleezza Rice To Voyage East
this article I saved for this occasion:
I Can’t Stand It When Jews Talk During Movies

Do you have a pet peeve—some little thing that drives you completely bonkers? For certain people, it's the sound of a Jewish person dragging her fingernails across a chalkboard. For others, it's when Jews don't signal before making a turn. Me? I can't stand it when Jews talk during movies!

Last Friday, I knocked off early from work and headed to the multiplex to catch The Pacifier. Sure enough, as soon as the lights go out, a pack of Jews waltzes in and plunks down right in front of me! All through the first preview, they had to have a Jewish debate about where to put their coats and who should hold the Twizzlers. What's wrong with these idiots? If you want to chat, go to a coffee shop, or that Jewish community center down on Cavendish Avenue.

Where did these people learn to whisper? An Israeli helicopter?

I sure didn't pay $10 to listen to a group of twits talk back to the screen like those obnoxious Jewish robots from Mystery Science Theater 3000! And apparently, "God's chosen people" weren't selected based on their ability to follow plotlines. No wonder they wandered the desert for so many years—they can't even watch a Vin Diesel movie without getting lost.

It would help if management took stronger action against this total lack of regard. A sign saying, "Jews: Kindly refrain from talking during the film" couldn't hurt. I don't think I'm being unreasonable here. That theater was as loud as an Elders of Zion meeting. Is it asking too much to expect a little courtesy from your fellow moviegoers? I guess some people just weren't raised gentile.

Look, I enjoy eating popcorn while taking in a flick, but at least I have the presence of mind to keep my munching to a conscientious level. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who wasn't raised in a barn where special precautions are taken to slaughter livestock in accordance with Jewish laws and traditions.

If you can keep kosher, why can't you keep quiet?

And how many times can these descendants of Abraham possibly need to use the washroom? If you have to go that often, sit near an aisle and leave the middle seats for those of us who aren't circumcised. You guys may not believe in the doctrine of original sin, but everyone agrees that failing to turn off your cell phone before the movie starts is just plain rude! I swear, the next time a phone goes off, someone's getting a yarmulke shoved down his throat.

If there were some other way to see movies, I'd do it. I've tried renting movies, only to have the film interrupted midway through by a Jewish telemarketer or the sounds of the Jews upstairs blasting their rap music. I can only imagine what that guy with the fiddler on his roof went through. It's the Jewish year 5766, for cripes sake! It's time to learn some courtesy.

And of course this scandal
Use Of 'N-Word' May End Porn Star's Career
‘Cum Inside' star Jennica St. Foxx is receiving heavy criticism for using a racial slur in her latest film.

Use Of 'N-Word' May End Porn Star's Career

And looking through their archives I’ve discovered this other tasty morsels of racial turmoil and triumph

A story about Anti-Racism Laws Mutate Racism Into Newer, Stronger Form that was so powerful that the Onion ran it on two separate occasions, first on November 24, 1999 and then on January 12th 2005.
At that rate soon racism will mutate into an unstoppable force; we must elect a half white president to solve and cure this scourge once and for all OR
Racial Harmony Achieved By Casting Of Black Actor As Teen Computer Whiz

BURBANK, CA—The long-standing economic, political and social divisions between blacks and whites in America at long last ended Monday with a TV producer's casting of a black actor in a bit part as a teen computer-whiz archetype.
Though racial equality had, throughout U.S. history, been seen as little more than a distant dream, TV producer Fern Blochner—co-producer of such popular daytime teen "dramedies" as Crestwood Daze and Chillin' Out In Study Hall—made that dream a reality when it came time to cast her newest series, My Home Ate My Dogwork, airing Saturday mornings on NBC.

"You wouldn't normally think a black kid would be running a high-school computer lab, but we have one doing just that," Blochner said of her show, whose uplifting and dignified portrayal of black youths in America is being widely credited for the sudden flowering of racial justice and harmony across the nation. "Our casting decision boldly defies the societal stereotype that black people are not smart enough to run high-school computer labs."

Shortly after the airing of the premiere episode of My Home Ate My Dogwork—in which the computer-whiz character is clearly visible in the background in no fewer than three separate scenes—the barriers of poverty, crime, and lack of equal access to education that have kept America's blacks at a disadvantage came crashing down.

"I'll admit, I was a bit shocked when I found out I got the part," said Darrell Goodwin, the 17-year-old actor who plays the computer whiz. "I thought to myself, 'The computer lab... run by a black kid? How could this be?' Then I realized that the casting decision deliberately defied society's racist expectations, expectations that I myself had bought into by doubting myself."

Though Blochner and her associates said they had reservations about the controversial casting decision, particularly regarding how others in the traditionally white entertainment industry would react, they held fast to their conviction that the teen computer whiz should be black.

"We were worried that institutional, internalized racism on the part of industry executives might manifest itself in the form of opposition to our casting decision," Blochner said. "But we stood our ground, and, as a result, such closed-mindedness is now a thing of the past."

Blochner said she came up with the idea to make the computer-whiz character black while doing background research for the show.

"We wanted our show to be as accurate as possible, so we spent some time at New Trier High School in the affluent Chicago suburb of Winnetka to ensure authenticity," Blochner said. "But after a few days at the school, we noticed a disturbing and unfair aspect of the upscale high school's student demographic: There were no blacks."

"We were very concerned that the high school had no black students, and that none of the students at the school had ever known any blacks, and that there were no blacks living anywhere within the neighborhoods zoned for the school," Blochner continued. "We said to ourselves, 'This is unfair!' and were determined to change reality for the better. So we decided that in our fictional version of the school, we would put in a black kid, and we'd make it seem like he's smart, too."

Noted sociologist Edwin Hull explained how the producers of My Home Ate My Dogwork were able to bring about racial equality in the U.S.

"By boldly envisioning a world in which African Americans possess the socioeconomic wherewithal not only to attend a high school like New Trier, but actually to run the computer lab therein, this television program created a 'positive media portrayal' of African Americans," Hull said. "This proactive portrayal of a positive African-American role model boosted the collective self-esteem of the nation's African-American community, thus establishing racial harmony at last."

Hull noted that this strategy was similar to the one used by the 1998 Environmental Media Awards, at which episodes of Baywatch and The X-Files featuring pro-environment themes were credited with last year's spontaneous healing of the ozone layer and the return of several dozen long-extinct species to the global ecosystem.

Appeared there an article about a Chinese Laundry Owner Blasted For Reinforcing Negative Ethnic Stereotypes

Recently Mugged Friend A Racist All Of A Sudden

CHICAGO—Ever since being mugged by a black man, 28-year-old Caucasian Mark Weisner has become a racist, friends reported Monday. "I used to be more trusting, but I learned my lesson the hard way in October," Weisner said, alluding to the mugging. "Now I'm a lot more cautious around certain types, if you know what I mean." Weisner added that he has "no problem with Asian Americans.

Affable Anti-Semite Thinks The Jews Are Doing Super Job With The Media

PLANO, TX—Henry McCullers, an affable Plano-area anti-Semite, praised the Jewish people Monday for doing "a bang-up job" running the media. "This has been such a great year for movies, and the new crop of fall TV shows looks to be one of the best in years," McCullers said. "And the cable news channels are doing a terrific job, too. Admittedly, they're not reporting on the Jewish stranglehold on world finance, but, hey, that's understandable.

Racist Merely Misspoke

HOLLY SPRINGS, MS–Apologizing for any misunderstanding, Holly Springs councilman Knox Jeffries explained Monday that he "merely misspoke" when he called African-American councilman Isaac Witherspoon "a dumb, spear-chucking porch monkey" during a Mar. 10 meeting. "I can see how my remarks could have been misconstrued as offensive, but I can assure you they were not intended as such," Jeffries said. "I am sorry for any hurt I may have inadvertently caused Ike, a fine, law-abiding Negro." Jeffries then extended an olive branch to Witherspoon, inviting him and his wife to his home for "a whole mess of collard greens and cornbread.

Good Cop, Bad Cop Both Racist

LOS ANGELES—Despite occupying opposing roles in a good-cop/bad-cop dyad, LAPD officers Frank K. McGrew, 51, and Bob West, 36, have one thing in common: They're both extremely racist, 77th precinct sources reported Monday.
"Officer McGrew is the tough, no-nonsense veteran of the force who pushes you around, threatens you with 15 years behind bars, and calls you a nigger," said LeShawn Gordon, a 19-year-old recently charged with grand theft auto. "Officer Bob is the one who picks you up, gives you a cigarette, and tells you he's there to help you before calling you a nigger."

Who can forget that great moment in American history when
Racist Figurines March On Washington

WASHINGTON, DC—Calling themselves "insulting caricatures born of bigotry" and "demeaning portrayals bearing no resemblance to actual human beings or cultures," an estimated 400,000 so-called jigaboos, pickaninnies and darky po' boys representing racist statuary from across the U.S. marched on Washington Monday.

Decrying their own existence, the figurines demanded that legislators acknowledge them as "the unwanted remnants of a bygone and hateful era" and take immediate steps toward abolishing racially stereotyped imagery like themselves.

"Look at me," Uncle Ben, a desexualized, rice-peddling "Good Slave" archetype, told fellow rallygoers. "I'm nothing like a real person. Look at my coveralls, my smiling, bug-eyed expression of passivity and subjugation. Clearly, I never should have outlasted the antebellum era, yet I'm still a widely recognized pop-cultural icon. I'm so angry I could boil in just five to ten minutes."

Ben and his female counterpart Aunt Jemima, a genial, syrup-filled "Matron Servant" archetype, led the crowd in chanting slogans such as "Jockey No More" and "Hold Your Own Pony!" Jemima encouraged the crowd to resist caricatured representation of African Americans by hurling themselves from shelves and by falling over on lawns and golf courses.

"We came all the way from a kitchen cabinet in Valdosta, GA," said one pair of grinning, apron-wearing salt-and-pepper shakers. "Never again will we add zesty flavor to soups and meals for The Man."

Another protester, a straw-hatted, gap-toothed, barefoot fisherman commonly used as lawn ornamentation in rural areas, was removed by police after damaging a public birdbath. Led away by authorities amidst the cheers of supportive marchers, the statue told reporters he will go on a hunger strike until he and all images like him are smashed into tiny pieces of ceramic debris.

The march began at the Washington Monument and concluded a short distance later at the U.S. Capitol. Featured speakers at the event included not only statuary but other forms of racist iconography as well, including characters from the once-popular children's book Little Black Sambo and several maidservants from Gone With The Wind.

In a moving gesture of solidarity, Hollywood detective hero Charlie Chan and his so-called "hon'able numba' wan son," as well as cartoon mouse Speedy Gonzales, spoke on behalf of other racially and culturally stereotyped media constructs.

Also in attendance at the rally were famed Mark Twain character Nigger Jim and folk-tale trickster Br'er Rabbit, both of whom cautioned protesters about the difficulties posed by archetypes that, on the surface, appear to be racist but may simultaneously function as an anti-racist critique.

Said Jim: "In the hundred-some years since my creation, critical reappraisals have affirmed me as an enduring symbol of Twain's abolitionist sympathies. Yet these same appraisals acknowledge that my exaggerated, overly stereotypical manner of speaking is at least somewhat problematic."

The presence of Br'er Rabbit—a traditional African folk character brought to America by slaves but later distorted by a white journalist in the "Africanist" reductivism of "Uncle Remus"—angered many rallygoers. He was eventually removed by a team of socio-political literary analysts from Howard University.

The controversial rabbit later escaped by convincing his captors to throw him into a briar patch, and his current whereabouts are unknown.

The non-violent march, which D.C. police officials praised as the most orderly and well-run protest in recent memory, ended at sunset with a candlelight vigil and ceremonial bonfire of the march's many wooden participants

Or this man’s discovery that This Racist Propaganda Practically Writes Itself!

Because, let’s be honest Stereotypes Are A Real Time-Saver

And where would we be without the efforts of those brave members of the Republican Party Urging Minorities To Get Out And Vote On [Wednesday] Nov. 3?

What kinda hearted lovers of democracy

From the stars
Virgo August 23 - September 22

While it's often understood that racism, by nature, is born of ignorance, your claims this week that the Irish control the media will still seem particularly uneducated.

Cancer June 22 - July 22

You realize it's an uphill battle with no guarantee of success, but if you don't silently disapprove of racism, who will?

Very true. Sad but true.

Oh fake racism-always fun. Why do you amuse me so?

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I'm glad to see

that others have noticed that for all of Barack's "transcendent eloquence" it's really just due to his ability to read other people's words in an "inspiring" style, a style taken from every southern black preacher ever.
He's not that quick on his feet. but really who needs that skill and ability as president?
I mean he's young and black and cool and dreamy ::swoon::

Jesse Jackson 1984 "David & Goliath"

Sounds familiar doesn't it?
but look (oba)Ma; no teleprompter!

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Before the Fame

From season 3 of the King of Queens in this episode “Strike Too
the smart alecky kid in Doug’s class is, well see for yourself
(hint: his character’s name on Entourage rhymes with Myrtle)

Jerry Ferrara Entourage’s “Turtle” in his first ever screen role back in 2000
I guess I was just a little out of it one time and the King of Queens came on like TBS but recognizing his face immediately
and I thought that was pretty cool

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Meet The Jacksons

Paris and Prince Michael! (children of The Michael Jackson)

Sorry, but this got me really too excited especially as I studied their faces and all but... I had never seen them before, their faces sans masks, and I wanted to see any similarities and if there were any. Though I have to say that is a good thing that the whole world didn't know a lot about them or what they looked like so they could at least have that sembalence of normality, because I can only guess to what extent the rest of their lives are far far from normal.

from TMZ

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Scott Tenorman Must Die!

because that last post reminded me of it and it is my absolute favorite South Park episode (having Radiohead was just icing on the cake) (in case you didn't know it's based on Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus, which was made into a phenomenal if bloody movie by Julie Taymor, which you should all see)

And “director” commentary with Trey Parker and Matt Stone (unless it's Matt Parker and Trey Stone

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Schadenfreude Pie: Best Served With a Glassful of Your Enemy’s Tears

Cartman: [walks over to Scott's end of the table] Yes! Yeess! Oh, let me taste your tears, Scott! [Starts licking Scott's tears off his face.] Mm, your tears are so yummy and sweet.

Cartman: Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness! Mm-yummy. [Licks the tears off the table and off Scott's face.] Mm-yummy, you guys!

From John Scalzi’s “Whatever Blog something that is totally up my alley and combines two of my great interest- baking and reveling in the pain , misery and misfortune of my enemies.

It's the world's first Schadenfreude Pie, the pie to enjoy while you are reveling in the horrible misfortunes of others. Why is there a Schadenfreude Pie? Because after I wrote the headline for this entry,
I wondered to myself, "what would Schadenfreude Pie taste like?"

My guess: Dark. Rich. And oh so bittersweet.

And you know what? That's exactly what it tastes like. Also -- and this is really just a perfect but unintentional extension of the whole schadenfreude metaphor -- you really only want a small slice; too much of this pie and it'll sit in the pit of your stomach like a rock of judgment, pulling you down. Small slice? Excellent. Big slice? You'll regret it. Just like schadenfreude itself.

Let's face it, schadenfreude is a dark emotion. It deserves a dark pie. Here are your ingredients.

  • 1 cup dark brown sugar
  • 1 cup dark corn syrup
  • 1/2 cup molasses
  • 1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
  • 1/2 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips or chunks
  • 3 large eggs (I used brown eggs in keeping with the spirit of things, but white eggs are fine)
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
  • 1 splash Kahlua or other coffee liqueur
  • 1 graham cracker pie crust (9 or 10 inches). Choose regular or chocolate graham cracker crust according to taste.

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees (Fahrenheit). Melt butter in largish mixing bowl; add in corn syrup, molasses, brown sugar and cinnamon. Mix well. Melt chocolate; fold into existing mixture. Add eggs and Kahlua; mix vigorously until mix has an even consistency. Pour into pie crust (depending on size of crust you may have a little filling mix left over).

Shove into oven, center of middle rack, and bake for about 45 minutes. At 45 minutes, poke pie with butter knife. If butter knife comes out clean, your pie is done; otherwise give it about another five minutes.

Once you take the pie out of the oven, let it set at least 20 minutes before you dig in. It's really good when still warm, however.

Serving recommendations: small slices (this is an awesomely rich pie) and an ice cold glass of milk to go with it.

Sounds tasty. Hm, maybe I should bake that for Super Bowl Sunday, just in case the Giants win.

P.S. you have to really check out the photos and captions on this page; I really enjoyed them

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Sexman Takes My Breath Away

Like literally he makes me laugh so hard I can’t breath
he has a new video today and I'm obsessed and can't go a day without

The first instance of genius: misspelling commit as, in the title screen “comit” and on the actual page comite

2nd: his description of the film “a video about bad things”
3rd- that he has a stuffed pet lion and he calls it his best friend (which I think isn’t that far from the truth)
4th: the movement and running down the ratchets up the tension
5th the lighting, or lack thereof gives a sinister and morbid vibe to the proceedings
6th: calling out “all those Emos” which is always appreciated (p.s. I remember when, “back in my day” those depressed kids were just called like teenagers or maybe goth- I blame dashboard
7th the fact that this kid- with his avoidance and condemnation of internet porn and that "God Bless" at the end is either incredibly ironic and subtly brilliant, or he’s actually religious and going to grow up and be a Republican and probably go to war
and finally, this isn't necessarily an instance of genius but of admiration, that this kid is inside making these videos instead of like, doing the whole outside thing.

Oh Sexman;live forever

That kid is totally my favorite internet celebrity this week

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There goes the straight male vote

It seems like Barack Obama is either afraid of strippers, or doesn’t support women who feel the need to earn money that women in order to, let’s be clichéd, pay their way through college, or believes that women don’t have the right to choose how they use their body , instead taking it upon himself to decide what is appropriate and/or degrading. Barack Obama- Anti Education. Anti Feminist. Anti-Freedom.

(or at least the way I spin this article)

From the BBC

Some years before Barack Obama began his run for the White House he found himself on a pub crawl in England helping give a traditional British send-off to a nervous bridegroom.

Then in his 30s, Mr Obama found himself witnessing the British ritual of the pre-wedding humiliation of the bridegroom. Ian and his friends had just moved to a pub called The Rose, when the predictable happened.

"When we got there we had a couple of drinks. Then there was a bit of a commotion and they sort of directed me into a back room with one exit," recalls Ian.

"Lo and behold, a strippergram turned up. She was a St Trinian's school girl."

"As she started I saw that he [Obama] was making an exit. He obviously saw my embarrassment because I was marrying his sister."

Soon afterwards [Obama] decided it was time to return to his hotel room.

Unless he went back to his hotel room to do lines of coke, which is always a possibility, that kind of story, about running away from a stripper can’t sit too well with straight guys.
I mean aren’t Presidents supposed to spirit away strippers and mistresses to that secret room off of the oval office? I don't trust one who wouldn't; seems too...Republican (see: Reagan, Ronald; Bush, George Walker)

This almost makes me want to start a rumor that Barack Obama is gay and just see if that spreads. I mean even gay guys can have kids and Michelle is a little mannish (not a fan) so that’s no straight proof
Plus this guy seems like the farthest thing from a liar

I mean he’s never come out and said he’s not gay (and it is obviously his responsibility to refute any allegations or lies that people like me put out onto the internets)

Keep it on the down low, Barack

Hmm, maybe that's why Barack supports ministers who support "reparative therapy"- he's obviously self hating.

p.s. that picture, which was attached to the original article makes me want to vomit

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Lies Movies Taught Me

Girls, if you’re ever frustrated and thinking about just marrying your BGF (best gay friend), you shouldn’t do it, apparently.

At least according to this advice columnnist

Q. I am a single mother of a 3-year-old boy, the result of an unplanned pregnancy. His father is a mess and not much a part of his life. A divorce is in the works.

Recently, a very close friend of mine who is a gay man has decided to enlist in the military. He has proposed a solution to both of our dilemmas by asking that we marry.
He is a wonderful man who loves my son like his own. We get along tremendously well and have been friends for 10 years. He would be my perfect match were he not homosexual.

To my surprise, I am considering his proposal. I am so exhausted from the last four years that the idea of having a second pair of hands, plus income and love for my son, is infinitely appealing. I also understand and respect his fears about being “discovered” by the military.

I consider myself to be a moral, intellectual and law-abiding individual, and I am having a difficult time separating my need for help from what is sensible and realistic. I am 28 years old and aware that I have so much more time to find a good mate. Can you help me sort this out?
A. When you are emotionally exhausted and have been burned often, it’s hard to see any potential for the future. So it’s tempting to throw in the towel and take the safe route.

Marriage to your gay friend is an entirely safe option, or at least appears to be. There’s no possibility of risk and rejection because there is no investment. You are not investing love, romance or sexual feelings, so you figure you aren’t vulnerable.

While I certainly can sympathize, I think that if you avoid risk, you avoid gain. It would be sad for you, at age 28, to shut the door on any potential for finding love. I think it would be a mistake to marry your friend.

On his end, there are many gay and unmarried men in the military, where they “don’t ask, don’t tell.” It is not imperative that your friend be married to join the military. So you don’t need to do this for his sake.

This seems to be about somebody providing a safety net for you. But it sounds as though he already does this. He is a male role model and an important part of your life and your son’s. You don’t need him to be your husband in order for him to continue in this role.

If you want to marry him for financial help, it is likely this will cause disputes in the future. Couples argue more about money than anything else. And these are couples who love each other and are building a life together. You two, even though you are extremely fond of each other, don’t have such a connection. There’s a great likelihood you will at some point start arguing about money, and one of you will become really resentful.
Not only that, but by marrying you are announcing to the world that you are unavailable. So you are closing the door on having a future sexual partner, and so is your friend. He won’t be in the military forever. When he finishes there, he might want to find love with a man. So you are harming chances for both of you to find what you really want.

Children aren’t dumb. As your son grows up, he will perceive the situation and know you aren’t a real couple. So think about the example you are sending to your son. Do you want him to grow up and have a romance-free relationship of his own?

You are young and have plenty of time ahead of you. It’s premature at age 28 to decide that hope is dead in the arena of love. Love is something that everyone is entitled to try for.

If you really want your friend around, he can move in like an uncle or a roommate. People have relatives and friends sharing their living quarters all the time. But I see no advantage to living a lie.

Though it is unfortunate you have such a difficult time with your ex-husband, this does not mean you are destined to forgo love forever. If you feel really hopeless, I advise you to seek therapy to see whether you are somehow attracted only to men who can never be right for you.

Dr. Gail’s Bottom Line: Marrying a gay friend, who seems to offer many advantages, will close you off to real romance in the future and is unlikely to turn out well.

But hasn’t she seen The Next Best Thing
The Object of My Affection

Such arrangements always work!

This columnist seems really old fashioned too- who says it would be living a lie? I mean they do love each other, even if not in love, and there are tonnes of couples who don't even have that. Plus it's not like if she meets someone she's actually interested in that she can't just say "hey, yeah I'm married but my husband is gay and so we can do whatever."
And plus there's that new fangled divorce thing-always an option.

Hmm, I should be an advice columnist- I feel I'd be amazing

(Note: I actually haven’t seen those movies either, but I assume that’s what those films taught
Note 2: that little mermaid is Hayden Panetierre-aww...and I really want to see the whole thing now. Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston have to be the cutest couple ever)

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This is going to make me sound like a horrible person

and I probably deserve it, condemnation and scorn that is, but…
I know he was sick and had some problems with his kidneys and it was all really scary but…

Is there a way for him to lose that face fat or is that a permanent change because of the kidney transplant? Because now he just kinda looks like he’s wearing a fat suit.

I say this with the utmost of concern. Ok commence the throwing of rotten tomatoes

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Free JJ!

He’ll always be my boy and I’ve wondered why every time I watch an Orlando game (like maybe 3 times) this season I never see him playing
Apparently it’s because there are 3 guards ahead of him and since he’s not playing he wants a trade

From an article in some Florida paper

Representatives for J.J. Redick repeatedly have approached the Orlando Magic about a trade that could provide the seldom-used shooting guard more playing time, but general manager Otis Smith said there are no plans to move Redick anytime soon.

Like last season, Redick has struggled to get consistent minutes with the Magic. The former college player of the year at Duke University has played in just 20 games this season for the 28-18 Magic. He is averaging just 3.7 points a game in 8.3 minutes a game this season.

Maurice Evans, Keith Bogans and Keyon Dooling have taken turns starting at shooting guard, and because they are better defenders and rebounders [Ed. Note- But I guarantee they don’t have nearly as beautiful and perfect a shot as JJ] , Redick has struggled to get little if any playing time for long stretches.

But Smith said because he knows Redick is a competent player merely in a tough situation, he has no plans to move him before the Feb. 21 NBA trade deadline. Also playing into Smith's thinking is the potential makeup of the Magic's roster come this summer.

"We know that he can play, but as with a lot of young guys he just has to be patient," said Smith, who drafted Redick 11th overall in the 2006 NBA Draft. "If I trade him and he goes somewhere else and plays well, then what?

"Look at how many free agents at guard that I have coming up next summer -- Carlos (Arroyo), Keyon (Dooling), Mo (Evans) and if the other guy (Keith Bogans) opts out, that would make four. J.J. could go from the bottom (of the depth chart) to the top, but he's got to be patient."

Van Gundy said he has conversations with his assistant coaches on a daily basis asking, 'Should we be playing him?' as it relates to Redick. He said Redick's ardent practice habits and how he has responded when put in games has made it difficult to keep Redick on the bench.

"I think about him all the time, and he makes you think about him with the way he practices," Van Gundy said. "I know he's really frustrated because there's not much more he can do. He plays well out here in practice, and when we give him chances in games he's played well. That's a frustrating thing, but he has to keep doing what he's doing. It's not a negative thing with him. I know he can help us and I'm sure he will."

He will Stan, but you better let him; he’s too good to be wasted
SO all I have to do so that JJ can play is injure Carlos Arroyo, Keyon (I always thought his name was Kenyon) Dooling , Mo Evans and Keith Bogans

but JJ all you need is patience,
Find the trails of patience.

Super Furry Animals-Patience [download]

just a little patience,

Guns N’ Roses- Patience [download]

don’t worry you’ll play you came in with flying colors

Love of Diagrams- Pace or The Patience [download]

discovered on the ever fun Fanhouse

and yeah I took the opportunity to make this post funner with movies and music; it felt thin. At least now it feels random and tacked on

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Too Much Testosterone Presents….



About the League

It was originally called Baton but was changed to comBATON shortly after the patent was issued in 1998. The name was derived by combining the words combat and baton due to common letters. It is a game of combat with the baton as the focal point.

The first practice was staged on November 20th, 2004 in Lake Mary, Florida. The inventor and patent holder, Steve Blanton, had been looking high and low to find someone to help develop the game but could find no one with enough imagination to see the potential. It took approximately ten years before someone was found that would help in the endeavor.

David Turnbull, who is the president of the A.A.U. Tae Kwon Do Association for the state of Florida and operator of two schools in the Lake Mary area, was approached by Steve. "It was like striking a vein of gold", as it was described by the patent owner. David had an unusually large lot of young black belts, some with 2nd and 3rd degrees, that were willing to play the game and help develop it.

There were 10 or 11 players that showed up for that first practice. Only a few basic rules were discussed before the players took to the field. David was also a player as well as taking over the coaching chores while Steve officiated. "It was amazing to see how instinctive the players interacted in a team concept," Steve later said. "They took to it naturally."

From that day forward David has been a prominent force in the development of the sport. More practices were scheduled at the Lake Mary soccer field and more players became involved. Another team formed in Spring Hill, Florida under the supervision of Brian Schneider, an owner and operator of a school there known as TaeKwonDo America. Paul and Ginger Allen got involved with their school at the RDV sports complex in Maitland, Florida. Wendi Turnbull, David's wife, helps manage the Lake Mary team. Parents from both teams have been instrumental in helping the sport along.

It is the intention of the league to become an international sport with a world playoff system. It is also the league's intension to convey the spirit of the marital arts and bring the martial arts community under one roof. To be an example for the world to follow on and off the field. That is, to respect others, to respect their property, to be courteous, and when off the field to fight only to defend. To develop moral and ethical conduct among the youth in every community around the world with discipline and honor. Something that our world greatly lacks today

That's a noble goal indeed. So far there are only two teams: “The Samurai of” Lake Mary and The Ninja of Spring Hill but with the popularity of like the MMAs, and guys hitting each for sport, the skies the limit

About the game
omBATON has some similarities to football but instead of blocking and tackling, players contact their opponent(s) with martial art kicks. Two teams play on a field approximately the size of an Arena Football field, there are 6 players on each team. A baton is used as the focus of the game as would a football, soccer ball or basketball would be for their games. The offense has control of the baton. The offensive player with possession of the baton can score on their opponent's goal pole by dislodging it with a martial art kick. Around the goal the strategy has similarities to basketball in that the baton can be thrown to teammates in order to find the open player in position to shoot on the goal and score. Take-downs and grappling are permitted on each end of the field in an area known as the strike zone
“its kinda like cricket, lacrosse, football and martial arts exhibitions all wrapped up into one.
the points system is this: 3 points for any standing kick, 4 points for any jumping kick up to 180 degrees and 5 points for any 360 degree spinning kick. The only way to stop the guy with a baton, and thus the advance to the goal, is to kick him off his feet or just so hard an official stops the action for a reset
if opposing teams possess the baton at the same time, they have a "Fight Off" which means the two guys get taken to a circle to battle it out over who gets the right to hold the baton.”

(here are more videos that perhaps explain the game better )

Kung Fu Football- now that’s catchy

and here are the rules

I found out about it from this website (I don’t like saying or writing its name-it’s disgusting)

Well, I guess it's not as bad as using the severed head of an enemy as a ball...

P.S. I wonder if they watch this speech to pump them up beforehand

Rugby guys are hot

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This Review Is Probably Funnier Than The Movie

Totally Amazing.
It is by Josh Levin over at Slate, about Meet The Spartans, and it is epic

sn't it massive consumer fraud to charge $10.50 for a barely hour-long movie? Perhaps, but it would've been unforgivable to make Meet the Spartans any longer than an hour. This was the worst movie I've ever seen, so bad that I hesitate to label it a "movie" and thus reflect shame upon the entire medium of film. Friedberg and Seltzer do not practice the same craft as P.T. Anderson, David Cronenberg, Michael Bay, Kevin Costner, the Zucker Brothers, the Wayans Brothers, Uwe Boll, any dad who takes shaky home movies on a camping trip, or a bear who turns on a video camera by accident while trying to eat it. They are not filmmakers. They are evildoers, charlatans, symbols of Western civilization's decline under the weight of too many pop culture references.
the spoofs of Zucker, Abrahams, and Zucker—the team behind Airplane! and The Naked Gun—are characterized by their facility with the tone and detail work of genre films and their genius combination of straight-faced B-movie actors with lowbrow punch lines and sight gags. Friedberg and Seltzer, rather than tweak the clichés of the movies they parody, take a NOW: That's What I Call Movies! approach, using farts and leather underwear to not-critique a collection of pre-chewed moments from recent blockbusters. In Meet the Spartans, the mere act of referring to Transformers, Happy Feet, Spider-Man 3, Ghost Rider, Rocky Balboa, Stomp the Yard, Shrek, Lindsay Lohan, Kevin Federline, or Deal or No Deal is presumed to be hilarious. (If you'll indulge me for a second, I will pause to crack up Friedberg and Seltzer: "Paris Hilton.")

Not content to merely insult its audience by charging full fare for a pastiche of sub-Mad TV-level sketches, Meet the Spartans dares to presume that it's smarter than the people watching. In anticipation of writing a piece on the decline of the spoof genre—a project that has been aborted, because forcing me to watch the entire Friedberg-Seltzer canon would require Slate to spend millions in hazard pay—I rented one of the duo's previous titles, Date Movie. I made it only halfway through, but I did notice that the DVD included an option to watch the film with a laugh track. I'm not kidding, and I don't think Friedberg and Seltzer are, either—they think we're too stupid to know where the stupid jokes are.

he continues with something I've always wondered
Here's the great irony of the Friedberg-Seltzer phenomenon: These two churn out crap, then brazenly parade the crapitude in trailers and commercials, essentially daring America to stay away.Instead, we reward them by making Meet the Spartans the top-earning movie in the country, the second straight Friedberg-Seltzer film to earn that honor.

Seriously. Every time I see one of those commercials I wonder who exactly would want to see that kind of movie and of course what that says about our culture. The answer? not good things

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Hanoi John

John McCain, barring something that I can’t foresee*, will be the Republican Nominee (get on board the Straight Talk Express! Choo choo!)
But some veterans (ok,I think I read that "they're" really just one guy who must think in the plural) aren’t fond of him and probably never will be, over something that I think was last an issue in 1992 and they put together lots of happy primers about why they don't trust American Hero John McCain, the following being one copied in full

Both McCain III’s father and grandfather were Admirals in the United States Navy. His father Admiral John S. ”Junior” McCain was commander of U.S. forces in Europe - later commander of American forces in Vietnam while McCain III was being held prisoner of war. His grandfather John S. McCain, Sr. commanded naval aviation at the Battle of Okinawa in 1945. McCain III, like his father and grandfather, also attended the United States Naval Academy. McCain III finished near the bottom of his graduating class in 1958.

McCain III lost five U.S. Navy aircraft
1 - Student pilot McCain III lost jet number one in 1958 when he plunged into Corpus Christi Bay while practicing landings.
2 - Pilot McCain III lost another plane two years later while he was deployed in the Mediterranean. ”Flying too low over the Iberian Peninsula, he took out some power lines which led to a spate of newspaper stories in which he was predictably identified as the son of an admiral.
3 - Pilot McCain III lost number three in 1965 when he was returning from flying a Navy trainer solo to Philadelphia for an Army-Navy football game. McCain III radioed, ”I’ve got a flameout” and ejected at one thousand feet. The plane crashed to the ground and McCain III floated to a deserted beach.
4 - Combat pilot McCain III lost his fourth on July 29, 1967, soon after he was assigned to the USS Forrestal as an A-4 Skyhawk combat pilot. While waiting his turn for takeoff, an accidently fired rocket slammed into McCain Jr’s. plane. He escaped from the burning aircraft, but the explosions that followed killed 134 sailors, destroyed at least 20 aircraft, and threatened to sink the ship.
5 - Combat pilot McCain III lost a fifth plane three months later (Oct. 26, 1967) during his 23rd mission over North Vietnam when he failed to avoid a surface-to-air missile. McCain III ejected from the plane breaking both arms and a leg in the process and subsequently parachuted into Truc Bach Lake near Hanoi. After being pulled from the lake by the North Vietnamese, McCain III was bayoneted in his left foot and shoulder and struck by a rifle butt. He was then transported to the Hoa Lo Prison, also known as the Hanoi Hilton.

1973 New York Daily News labeled POW McCain III a “PW Songbird”
On McCain III’s fourth day of being denied medical treatment, slapped, and threatened with death by the communist (they were demanding military information in exchange for medical treatment), McCain III broke and told his interrogator, ”O.K., I’ll give you military information if you will take me to the hospital.” U.S. News and World Report, May 14, 1973 article written by former POW John McCain. It was then that the communist learned that McCain III’s father was Admiral John S. McCain, the soon-to-be commander of all U.S. Forces in the Pacific. The Vietnamese rushed McCain III to Gai Lam military hospital (U.S. government documents), a medical facility normally unavailable for U.S. POWs. By Nov. 9, 1967 (U.S. government documents) Hanoi press was quoting McCain III describing his mission including the number of aircraft in his flight, information about rescue ships, and the order of which U.S. attacks would take place. While in still in North Vietnam’s military hospital, McCain III gave an interview to prominent French television reporter Francois Chalais for a series titled Life in Hanoi. Chalais’ interview with McCain III was aired in Europe. Vietnamese doctors operated on McCain’s Leg in early December, 1967. Six weeks after he was shot down, McCain was taken from the hospital and delivered to a U.S. POW camp, In May of 1968, McCain III allowed himself to be interviewed by two North Vietnamese generals at separate times.” May 14, 1973 article written by former POW John McCain In August 1968, other POWs learned for the first time that John McCain III had been taken prisoner. On June 5, 1969, the New York Daily News reported in a article headlined Reds Say PW Songbird Is Pilot Son of Admiral, “ . . . Hanoi has aired a broadcast in which the pilot son of United States Commander in the Pacific, Adm. John McCain, purportedly admits to having bombed civilian targets in North Vietnam and praises medical treatment he has received since being taken prisoner . . .” The Washington Post explained McCain III’s broadcast: “The EnglishLanguage broadcast beamed at South Vietnam was one of a series using American prisoners. It was in response to a plea by Defense Secretary Melvin S. Laird, May 19, that North Vietnam treat prisoners according to the humanitarian standards set forth by the Geneva Convention.” In 1970, McCain III agreed to an interview with Dr. Fernando Barral, a Spanish psychiatrist who was living in Cuba at the time. The meeting between Barral and McCain III (which was photographed by the Vietnamese) took place away from the prison at the office of the Committee for Foreign Cultural Relations in Hanoi (declassified government document). During the meeting, POW McCain sipped coffee and ate oranges and cakes with the Cuban. While talking with Barral, McCain III further seriously violated the military Code of Conduct by failing to evade answering questions ”to the utmost of his ability” when he, according government documents, helped Barral by answering questions in Spanish, a language McCain had learned in school. The interview was published in the in January 1970. McCain III was released from North Vietnam March 15, 1973 In 1993, during one of his many trips back to Hanoi, McCain asked the Vietnamese not to make public any records they hold pertaining to returned U.S. POWs. McCain III claims, that while a POW, he tried to kill himself. McCain III was awarded “medals for valor” equal to nearly a medal-and-a-half for each hour he spent in combat For 23 combat missions (an estimated 20 hours over enemy territory), the U.S. Navy awarded McCain III, the son of famous admirals, a Silver Star, a Legion of Merit for Valor, a Distinguished Flying Cross, three Bronze Stars, two Commendation medals plus two Purple Hearts and a dozen service medals. “McCain had roughly 20 hours in combat,” explains Bill Bell, a veteran of Vietnam and former chief of the U.S. Office for POW/MIA Affairs -- the first official U.S. representative in Vietnam since the 1973 fall of Saigon. “Since McCain got 28 medals,” Bell continued, “that equals to about a medal-and-a-half for each hour he spent in combat. There were infantry guys -- grunts on the ground -- who had more than 7,000 hours in combat and I can tell you that there were times and situations where I’m sure a prison cell would have looked pretty good to them by comparison. The question really is how many guys got that number of medals for not being shot down.” For years, McCain has been an unchecked master at manipulating an overly friendly and biased news media. The former POW turned Congressman, turned U.S. Senator, has managed to gloss over his failures as a pilot and his collaborations with the enemy to become America’s POW-hero presidential candidate.

Interesting. What really gets me is the idea that McCain is some Manchurian candidate plant brainwashed by a government that no longer exists just waiting……………for like 35 years(! ) to make his move.
Beyond ludicrous.
(Barack, however is still a strapping and young man, and getting massive donations from foreign sources )

If you want to know more about how John McCain “has betrayed his country” and is waiting to do it again, or something, this website is pretty (obsessed) extensive

*of course I couldn’t foresee that it was going to rain even though the sky was flooded with grey clouds last night, so take all my visions with a heap of salt

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TV Intros from an Alternate Universe

a/k/a/ the internets
This was on Best Week Ever and though their description of it was something like “the girl duck from DuckTales gets abducted by a creepy online predator then rescued and returned to her Uncle Scrooge” this was not what I was expecting at all. Sooo creepy

Let that be a listen to you kiddies- never arrange to meet someone in person that you met on the Internet and claims to be from Ducksburg

And of course in my own twisted curiosity of what exactly the internets would do I checked and there were more. Oh yes- the twisted and bizarre minds who brought you the above had made a slew (is there a specific quantity that makes up a slew?) of these alternate TV intros.
They’re all from (I’m assuming the guys of) Fatal Farm
I’ll only show the intros to the shows that I actually watched but you can see them all here

The Golden Girls? (who doesn’t love cookies and the Golden Girls? Nevermind I don’t want to know such people exist)

I really really don’t get this one but,decided for yourself …it’s Happy Days intercut with scenes of suicide and it is gross

Doogie! (this one is far more subtle)

Cheers! And wow, just wow- that was unexpectedly funny (I do love that song; it makes everything seem more homey and cheerful)

their minds work so differently from mine,…and I couldn't be happier.
(though I could see their "That 70's Show" intro ending in like a horrific car crash)

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The Next Al Gore?

An intriguing idea for John Edwards from

Edwards--The Al Gore of Economic Struggle
So, John Edwards is dropping out of the presidential race. From trade to an ability to really talk about unions and on whole lots of other issues, Edwards shaped the Democratic presidential debate.

The question is: what now? I'm hoping that he becomes the Al Gore of economic struggles. Gore rose dramatically in stature--far beyond what he ever achieved as a political figure or a candidate running for office--when he became THE political voice on climate change. I'm hoping that Edwards, who made it clear that the campaign to end poverty in America was the calling of his life, now continues that fight. As a non-candidate, more people (and, maybe even, the pathetic press) will tune into a message that comes from someone who is not running for office.

Working Americans--the people who Edwards wanted to represent and whose policies and positions were superior to the other major candidates--will need an advocate for them past the general election. In the past several months, I've told virtually every person or audience that I've spoken to that, no matter who wins, we--that would be, labor advocates or people trying to build an economic justice movement--will still have a fight on our hands because the system that a new president would confront (whether they feel audacious and hopeful or not) will be hard to change without a movement out in the country demanding that change.

We still face a battering of wages, disappearing pensions, 47 million people without health care, so-called "free trade" deals that Democrats don't seem united to vanquish from the agenda, unprecedented greed in the CEO know the drill.

Edwards has a role to play as a rallying force for those people who want to change the economic system.

Edwards, seize the moment.
Of course I want him to keep doing the good that he's doing and also spend time with and let his family know how much he loves them while he can but,
I really like that idea- I think he would be amazing at it (and once the Great Recession starts and everyone is struggling economically (even more so) we'll look back and say a collective, damn
And if you think about it who will history look more kindly upon Al, or GweeB.
Only after he lost and devoted himself to a forgotten issue and made people understand its importance did people really understand how much they screwed up.
I can see that happening again.

But then there is pretty legitimate and understandable speculation that JRE would be named the AG, which he would also be amazing at.

Plus in order for him to be President I’d only have to kill:
the president, vice president, speaker of the house, president pro tem of the senate, secretary of state, secretary of the treasury and secretary of defense.
Damn, that's a lot of people

(and about the line of succession, from wikipedia here are some thoughts that I never thought about it before and why its screwed up:

from James Madison (whom James Monroe may have been in love with-check his last words)

Under the principle of separation of powers, the Constitution specifically disallows legislative officials from also serving in the executive branch. For the Speaker or the President pro tempore to become Acting President, they must resign their position, at which point they are no longer in the line of succession. This forms a constitutional paradox to some.

and some other controversies
1. The reality that all figures in the current line of succession work and reside in the vicinity of Washington, D.C. In the event of a nuclear, chemical, or biological attack, it is possible, perhaps even likely, that everyone on the list would be killed or incapacitated.
2. Doubt (such as those expressed above by James Madison) that Congressional leaders are eligible to act as President.
3. A concern about the wisdom of including the President pro tempore in the line of succession as the "largely honorific post traditionally held by the longest-serving Senator of the majority party." For example, from January 20, 2001 to June 6, 2001, the President pro tempore was 98-year-old Strom Thurmond of South Carolina.
4. A concern that the current line of succession can force the presidency to abruptly switch parties mid-term, as the Speaker and the President Pro Tempore are not necessarily of the same party as the President.
5. A concern that the succession line is ordered by the dates of creation of the various executive departments, without regard to the skills or capacities of the persons serving as their Secretary.
6. The fact that, should a cabinet member begin to act as President, the law allows the House to elect a new Speaker (or the Senate, a new President pro tempore), who could in effect remove the cabinet member and assume the office him- or herself at any time.
7. The absence of a provision where a President is disabled and the Vice Presidency is vacant (for example, if an assassination attempt simultaneously wounded the President and killed the Vice President).

There are no explicit provisions for what would happen if everyone on the list were dead, unable to serve, or otherwise ineligible to assume the Presidency. Deputy secretaries would not be eligible, as the line of succession only applies to full Cabinet members. In the event of the death of their superior, deputy secretaries only assume the responsibilities as "acting secretary"—positions that are not counted in the line of presidential succession. If Congress were still able to convene, then the House could elect a new Speaker or the Senate could elect a new President pro tempore who would then immediately act as President. However, this could be dangerously time consuming during a national emergency, and would be delayed even further if the crisis left both houses of Congress without a quorum to fill those key leadership positions, requiring special elections to fill seats in the House of Representatives or state gubernatorial appointments to replace Senators. This possibility has caused some discussion on constitutional or legal remedies, although no formal action has been taken.

Our government is way too easy to disrupt and throw into turmoil. When will people learn-democracy has failed

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Breaking News: Britney Still Crazy

Has not achieved psychic stability in the past month

From the LA Times

Los Angeles Police officers physically removed pop star Britney Spears from her home early today, placing the troubled celebrity on a "mental health evaluation hold," authorites said.

More than a dozen motorcycle officers and a Los Angeles Fire Department ambulance swept through the front gates of Spears' hilltop Studio City residence shortly before 1 a.m., as a police helicopter hovered overhead. At 1:08 a.m., officers inside the home radioed to commanders that "the package is on the way out."

Spears was rushed from a side entrance of her home into an ambulance. As she was driven down Coldwater Canyon Boulevard, her vehicle was escorted by more than a dozen motorcycle officers, two cruisers and two police helicopters. Her final destination was the UCLA Medical Center, authorities said.

This is the second time in a month that Spears has been placed on a 72-hour welfare hold. The first occurred on Jan. 3, when Spears declined to give up custody of her children to ex-husband Kevin Federline.

The Summit, the winding street on which Spears lives in Studio City, was jammed with the vehicles of journalists and photographers for several hours prior to the police operation.

Authorities said the welfare hold was prompted by a telephone call they received from Spears' psychiatrist. It was unclear exactly when they had received the call, but it was apparent that the operation had been carefully planned over a period of time. Unlike the first welfare hold — in which Spears' ambulance was closely pursued by a throng of photographers — vehicles today were blocked from following the same route. The motorcade that whisked Spears to the hospital also showed a large investment in resources. The line of emergency vehicles stretched longer than a football field.

(Really must suck to be one of her neighbors.)
Good to know our resources are being used well and appropriately and where they are so desperately needed

And from TMZ’s understandably extensive coverage

Last night, Britney's new psychiatrist went to her home and felt she was a danger to herself and others -- partly because of her reckless driving and partly because of her "downhill behavior." As a result, the shrink launched a plan (days in the making) to have Britney committed to UCLA Medical Center by calling the cops.

Sources tell us the cops knew it was coming. In fact, the plan was for cops and paramedics to take Britney away the night before, but it was scrubbed. Last night, it all went down according to plan. Cops even used code to minimize craziness in transporting Britney to the hospital. Over the police radio, she was referred to as "The Package."

Before the cops arrived, the shrink told her she was going back to the hospital and she offered no resistance. She said, "Is something wrong?" She made hot chocolate and waited. Her mom, Lynne, got extremely agitated, accusing Sam of engineering the impending commitment. We're told Brit told her to "shut the hell up." She demanded silence, sat on the floor and wrote notes to people who were there as they waited. When emergency personnel arrived, Brit went on the gurney without resistance.

When everyone arrived at UCLA, things got heated. Jamie Spears began screaming at Sam Lutfi, accusing him of trying to control Britney. We're told as far as the doctors are concerned -- at least for now -- Lynne and Jamie Spears are not calling the shots. The point guy for the docs is Brit's friend, Sam Lutfi.

Sources say after Britney's commitment earlier this month, she was extremely upset at her dad for getting angry at Sam and the hospital staff. Britney had lawyers draft several documents, however, we're told she did not sign a durable power of attorney giving Lutfi the power to make medical decisions on her behalf. Nevertheless, something was signed and doctors are going to Lutfi for guidance. Jamie went off on Lutfi in the hallway, accusing him of trying to control his daughter.

Britney has been calm in the hospital, even getting a "cigarette break."

an L.A. County Superior Court judge has just signed a "5150," meaning Britney Spears is on a three-day psychiatric hold at the UCLA Medical Center.

We're told there is a "good possibility" that it will be extended to 14 days. We've also learned there have been several parallel attempts to get Britney on a 5150. Her lawyers, Anne Kiley and Tara Scott, secured a new psychiatrist late last week -- he's the one who triggered the 5150 last night.

TMZ has learned Britney's parents have won round one in the tug of war with Sam Lutfi. We're told the doctors at UCLA are now "fully cooperating" with the parents in the treatment of Britney Spears,

Oh that's good because y'know they haven't had every opportunity over the past 26 years to help their daughter.

But really someone just take her to Lakehead Hospital or something, lock her up, keep here there, far from everything for a year or so and help her get better. Who knows she could become the next Judy Garland instead of the latest (insert name of classic doomed starlet here)

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Slaugherhouse Cruelty

No shit, right?
Well, this video really opened my eyes (and maybe because it's not from like PETA who I would dismiss out of hand)

But this video is really disturbing and depraved and those poor poor cows. I stopped eating meat because I didn't want to help kill cute things, including cows which have that quality for me, so this video was super sad, and now I'm glad I 've stopped and I'm not sure if I could go back.
It's taken from a Humane Society Investigation of a slaughterhouse in Chino

What sick people! Have they like no compassion?
I wonder if this will piss people off and disgust them like they were with Mike Vick or if they can't be bothered over their steak

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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Midnight Movies from The Public Domain

The Avenging Conscience or “Thou Shalt Not Kill”
From 1914 directed by D.W. Griffith from an Edgar Allen Poe story (guess which one)

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What do you say to taking chances?

Taking Chances by Céline Dion

This may strip me of all of my (self-granted) indie cred but…I really really like this song. It surprised me to- usually I hate French Canadians on principle but damn the girl’s got pipes. I wish I could hit some of those notes (plus the song is so inspirational I think the media is confusing it with Barack)

Don't know much about your life
Don't know much about your world but
Don't want to be alone tonight
On this planet they call earth

You don't know about my past and
I don't have the future figured out
And maybe this is going too fast
And maybe it's not meant to last,

But what do you say to taking chances
What do you say to jumping off the edge
Never knowing if there's solid ground below
Or a hand to hold
Or hell to pay

What do you say
What do you say

I just wanna start again
Maybe you could show me how to try
Maybe you could take me in
Somewhere underneath your skin

What do you say to taking chances
What do you say to jumping off the edge
Never knowing if there's solid ground below
Or a hand to hold
Or hell to pay

What do you say
What do you say

And I've had my heart beaten down
But I always come back for more, yeah
There's nothing like love to pull you up
When you're lying down on the floor there,
So talk to me, talk to me like lovers do
Yeah walk with me, walk with me like lovers do
Like lovers do

What do you say to taking chances
What do you say to jumping off the edge
Never knowing if there's solid ground below
Or a hand to hold
Or hell to pay

What do you say
What do you say

Don't know much about your life
Don't know much about your world

Here’s the official “thrilling and action packed" video

and here she is singing it live

Céline Dion- Taking Chances[download] buy it on iTunes
Céline Dion - Taking Chances - Taking Chances

What do you say?

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Return of The King

From a blog post in the LA Times about the possible appearance of The King of Pop, Michael Jackson at the Grammys

"But here's hoping he's not in the Staples Center next weekend. For one, if he is, every other artist and performance will be overshadowed by talk of what Jackson will/or won't do, and what he will look like. And besides, the Grammys should honor the past year in music, not help sell a re-issue for Sony.

But more important, Jackson has already received a better tribute than the Grammys can provide. It came by way of Chicago rapper Rhymefest, who, along with Grammy-nominated producer Mark Ronson (Lily Allen, Amy Winehouse), has crafted a Jackson "dedication album," which takes inspiration from Jackson's work to create compelling new songs. I first learned about the project, dubbed "Man in the Mirror," via the blog of the Chicago Tribune's Greg Kot, and I haven't been able to stop listening since I downloaded it on Friday."

Yeah it’s really good, but since I really feel like I can’t write about music (dancing about architecture and all) I’ll leave it up to a professional (and just copy and paste)

"But Rhmyefest is able to do what major label marketing firms have failed at doing, and that's trim Jackson of the tabloid drama and bring the focus back to his music. Rhymefest sets out right away to humanize Jackson, and bring him down to earth, portraying him as a simple man from Gary, Ind., one who still has the power to unite a desperate community (see "Mike the Mentor"). He also inter-splices the album with brief, but always humorous, "conversations" with Jackson, in which Rhymefest's inserts himself into dialogue from Jackson interviews.

It's a tribute to a hero, but also a call to action. The 25th anniversary of "Thriller" comes bloated with extra tracks and remixes from, Kanye West, Akon and Fergie, a disjointed smattering of superstars rather than a cohesive collection (as Rhymefest writes on his MySpace page, "As a fan, I expected a bit more"). By contrast, Rhymefest and Ronson have created a seamless offering, in which the rapper and the King of Pop play give-and-take with Jackson's songs of yore.

"Can't Make It" opens with a sample of "You Can't Win," and swipes and spices funk sounds over bombastic beats, mixing hip-hop dreams with a working-class reality. Rhymefest re-imagines "Dancing Machine" as a sparse club tune, and Rhymefest dramatically dances around a young Jackson covering "Ain't No Sunshine," re-crafting it as a song about tortured aspirations.

Rhymefest has more fun with Jackson's "Break of Dawn," turning it into the sly and soulful "Breakadawn," in which he wonders what Jackson's share of the Beatles catalog is worth. "Don't Let Your Baby Catch You" becomes the playful "Foolin' Around," and the title track brings it to a show-stopping close, with Rhymefest asking what he's done to lose the trust of his own mother.

After listening to "Man in the Mirror," it's clear there's only one Jackson Grammy pairing worth hearing: Jackson & Rhymefest, a duo that would probably make CBS suits cringe."

Doesn’t Rhymefest sound like a Lyricsist Lounge type event plus with a birth name like Che I wouldn't even bother with a street name

Anyway by any name he’s nice “He co-wrote "Jesus Walks and in 1997, he famously beat rapper Eminem in a freestyle battle at the Scribble Jam”

The Ronson/Rhymefest Man in The Mirror seems to be about half skits, but they’re pretty entertaining, though I don’t think Michael actually came into the studio to record them (but their impersonator is really really good)
You can download it here as a .zip

Yeah there’s some hottness there

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Sean Penn as Harvey Milk

from Defamer

The Real Harvey

The "Penn" Harvey

Hmm, I don't see it from that angle, but I trust Sean Penn and Gus van Sant

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A Quick Question

Isn't an endorsement from the New York Post kind of like an anti-endorsement especially with their homophobic ways, shoddy journalism and the fact that they're run by this guy who's so evil it's almost comical?

Seems to me like getting an endorsement from Bill O'Reilly, but congrats Barack. Just remember you're judged by the company you keep

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Big Spending Scientologists

Lafayette Hubbard would be quite happy
From Page Six

Longtime Scientologist Nancy Cartwright — best known as the voice of Bart Simpson — last year gave the church $10 million to help spread the word of founder L. Ron Hubbard into other galaxies.

It was all part of Scientology’s Global Salvage effort, which aims to “de-aberrate” Earth — meaning to rid mankind of psychology ills and other “aberrant” behavior.

In 2004, [Tom Cruise Mapother] was awarded a Platinum Meritorious Award for a $2.5 million gift. Two years later, he doled out another $2.5 million, for which the International Association of Scientologists kicked him up to Diamond Meritorious awardee.

Recent Scientology publications reveal that a host of A-list Scientologists were honored for their generosity at a black-tie awards ceremony at the church’s headquarters in Clearwater, Fla., last summer.

Here are some of the celeb gifts from 2007 and their corresponding rewards:

* Nancy Cartwright, 50, Patron Laureate Award: $10 million.
* Kirstie Alley, 57, Diamond Meritorious Award: $5 million.
* John Travolta, 53, Gold Meritorious Award: $1 million.
* Kelly Preston, 45, Gold Meritorious Award: $1 million.
* Priscilla Presley, 62, Patron Award: $50,000.

Uh oh John- Tom is more clear than you

Well, even if you don’t receive anything else, such as spiritual gifts for your millions upon millions of dollars at least you get “various gold trophies, crystal statuettes and plaques” as well as fancy titles.

Yeah and those are just like donations, which are on top of all the other services and charges (see how much they’ll cost you)
Two hundred and seventy seven thousand dollars (give or take a 10)just to reach OT VIII, jesus hubbard christ! Y'know in Christianity monks and priests take vows of poverty and get to know all the secrets. Bizzare

Is anyone else interested in seeing Nancy Cartwright doing that Tom Cruise video in the voice of Bart Simpson? Because I am, for at least 3 more minutes

Oh and your “Global Salvage effort, which aims to “de-aberrate” Earth — meaning to rid mankind of psychology ills and other “aberrant” behavior.
Hmm, how’s that working out for y’all? And though I'm kind of curios about it....It sounds too much to me like cleansing and not so much the good kind- more the ethnic

P.s. Does anyone know who Steve Brackell or Jack and Lucy Murphy are? I want to persecute and boycott.

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