Monday, December 31, 2007

We'll Take a Cup O’ Kindness Yet

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind ?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and auld lang syne ?

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And surely you’ll buy your pint cup !
And surely I’ll buy mine !
And we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

We two have run about the slopes,
and picked the daisies fine ;
But we’ve wandered many a weary foot,
since auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

We two have paddled in the stream,
from morning sun till dine† ;
But seas between us broad have roared
since auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And there’s a hand my trusty friend !
And give us a hand o’ thine !
And we’ll take a right good-will draught,
for auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And it's been a long December and there's reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last ...

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In The Dying Hours of the Year

I read this Op-Ed in the New York Times and it reminded me of my usual thoughts on New Years (how for some reason I always expect to feel something a change as the old year dies and the new year ascends) so I'd thought I'd share it
New Year's Eve
At midnight tonight, the horses on this farm will age a year. That is the custom — every horse has the same birthday, Jan. 1. Like all things calendrical, this is a human convention. When it comes to equine conventions, I know enough to notice some of the simpler forms of precedence: who goes first through a gate, who gets to the grain feeder ahead of the others. But I can report that the horses make no fuss about their common birthday or the coming of the new year. Tonight, like any other, they will be standing, dozing on their feet, ears tipping back and forth at the slightest of sounds.

There is something deeply gratifying about joining the horses in their pasture a few minutes before the clock strikes 12 on New Year’s Eve. What makes the night exceptional, in their eyes and mine, is my presence among them, not the lapsing of an old year.

It’s worth standing out in the snow just to savor the anticlimax of midnight, just to acknowledge that out of the tens of millions of species on this planet, only one bothers to celebrate not the passing of time, but the way it has chosen to mark the passing of time. I remember the resolutions I made when I was younger. I find myself thinking that one way to describe nature is a realm where resolutions have no meaning.

It’s not that time isn’t passing or that the night doesn’t show it. The stars are wheeling around Polaris, and the sugar maples that frame the pasture are laying down another cellular increment in their annual rings. The geese stir in the poultry yard. A hemlock sheds its snow. No two nights are ever the same.

I always wonder what it would be like to belong to a species — just for a while — that isn’t so busy indexing its life, that lives wholly within the single long strand of its being. I will never have even an idea of what that’s like.

I know because when I stand among the horses tonight, I will feel a change once midnight has come. Some need will have vanished, and I will walk back to the house — lights burning, smoke coming from the wood stove — as if something had been accomplished, some episode closed.

I always/usually spend New Year's by myself-parties and stuff seem like forced frivolity and last year when I went to a rather sweet concert (Cat Power/Gnarls Barkley/Flaming Lips) at midnight I ended up exchanging tidings with a creepy random guy that reminded me of Danny Trejo- and tonight will be no different. I'm going to find a spot on Hermosa Beach with a pack of Camels and a bottle of Barbera d'Asti and one with yet separate from the Cosmic as the waves keep crashing. forever and forever...
It is a wonderful thing,those moments of infiniteness.

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The Best and the Brightest

because if they're popular that must mean they're the best, right?
Anyway here are the "popular" pages and things (according to the meticulous records that tracking software keeps) on "a dream or a song" for the past half year. And of course since you've all been here since the beginning these are all going to look awfully familiar...

Top 10 Most Visited Pages

  1. Drink of the Week: Nancy Drew Edition
  2. The 2nd Best Thing I've Seen This Week (really not sure why this one was so popular)
  3. Forbidden Decadence/Ultimate Desire
  4. Kid Nation: Taylor's So Gonna Get Fragged
  5. Celebrity Showdown: Amy Adams v. Isla Fisher
  6. Boyz II Men are Jewish?
  7. Ad Diction: Fairy Tale Gum
  8. Your Stuck in My Head Song(s) of the Day- Ben's Brother's- Stuttering/International Noise Conspiracy-Smash it Up
  9. Celebrity Showdown: Elizabeth Banks vs. Rachel Macadams
  10. Your Kinda Gay Video of the Day-Electric Six-Gay Bar (actually let's make it Top 20 because these next ones were fun)
  11. Ad Diction: Universal Languages
  12. Superstar- The Karen Carpenter Story
  13. This Feels Very Wrong
  14. Homer Simpson: Picture a Day for 39 Years
  15. Overheard in LME- The Games These People Play
  16. Real World Sydney (so I wrote about this show once in passing and didn't watch it but whatever I said must have been insightful,obvs)
  17. Somewhere in Rainbows
  18. But Who Will Catch the Predator Catchers?
  19. Good for Her!
  20. (tie) Man vs.Wild Confuses Me; Note to ATP Players: Shane Stant is Probably Available; Kid Nation-I Want Alex
Top 10 "Most Studied" Pages (pages where people spent the most time/left the window open)
  1. Come Out, Come Out Whoever You Are
  2. There Are No Gay People in Islam. (besides Benazir Bhutto's son, Bilawal)
  3. Drink of the Week: Totally Random
  4. It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere: Rainbow Bright Edition
  5. Best Band Ever*- Tikkle Me
  6. Man vs. Wild Confuses Me
  7. People to Whom I Would Say "Eat Me" (grammar suck at do i)
  8. Things that are too cool/trendy for me [Sept.5th]
  9. Ad Diction: The World's Most Expensive Sex Toy
  10. (tie...basically) Breaking News! Rehab Works; Rainbows and Butterflies
Top Downloaded Songs
  1. Carly Comando-Everyday
  2. Mandy Moore-Umbrella (edged out at the last moment for #1)
  3. Ben's Brother-Stuttering (i had forgotten how great and catchy this song was until this past weekend)
  4. Los Campesinos-You! Me! Dancing!
  5. (tied)Landon Pigg-Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop; Catherine Zeta Jones-All That Jazz
  6. (tied) Bill Withers-Lean on Me; Phillip Glass-Metamorphoses 2
  7. (tied) Oasis-Live Forever; Tori Amos-Father Figure
  8. (tied) Carole King-You've Got a Friend; Radiohead-Optimistic
  9. (tied) Serge Gainesbourg and Jane Birkin- Je T'aime...Moi Non Plus; Lauryn Hill-The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill
  10. Radiohead-Last Flowers till Hospital

I was thinking about doing a "My Top Obsessions" but that would require a lot of work and I'm sure it'd be like John Edwards, robots enslaving humanity, Radiohead and other things. You can try it for yourself.
Then I was going to do a "Top 10 Least Appreciated" that would have focused on the posts that i was actually kind of proud of and that I thought were unique, but of course all my posts are beloved children (albeit some may have had more heart/emotion/gin behind them) even if I get strangely happy whenever I can fit in a "crotch shots" tag. All that being said until they find Steve Fossett's body I'm sticking with my original theory...

(and on a related note the L.A. Times listed their most popular stories of 2007 and a little surprisingly, but not really "Old Mike, New Christine" was the number 1 viewed piece and it just seemed fitting because, even though I can't read it anymore without getting very emotional, that was definitely the most important article/column/confession I read this year, probably ever, and also was a pretty direct impetus for the most important/hardest thing I did in 2007. )

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Sunday, December 30, 2007

Who Said It: Bush, Hitler or Barack?

I think I first had the idea about this when listening to some old interview with GweeB about being an outsider and of course being a uniter and it reminded me of Barack Obama (or maybe the other way around) …and in some way to Hitler (another "uniter who didn't turn out so awesome.)
SO I though this would be an interesting and fun enough experiment to have a few quotes from each demagogue and see if you can tell who the speaker(or writer) was; George Walker Bush, Adolf Evil Hitler or Barack Hussein Obama (and though I’ve removed some Proper nouns which would make this incredibly obvious the meaning in each statement is still there) I may do an answer key but the fact that one may actually be needed proves whatever (delusion/exaggeration) point I have.
And feel free to leave your thoughts/guesses in the comments.

  1. That's what I want to do. In the course of the campaign, it's the first thing I want to do. The second is to elevate the discourse. I'm not going to participate in the old Washington, D.C., game of gossip and slander.
  2. Second, I showed the people of [my state] that I'm a uniter, not a divider. I refuse to play the politics of putting people into groups and pitting one group against another.
  3. People are very hungry for something new. I think they are interested in being called to be a part of something larger than the sort of small, petty, slash-and-burn politics that we have been seeing over the last several years.
  4. During the course of the campaign, I didn't talk about the past; I talked about the future.
  5. The answer to anybody's anxiety about me is in my deeds and actions. I have a strong faith. I am a religious man. I believe in Christ, and therefore my actions hopefully reflect a heart that cares for others. I understand good people can disagree on issues.
  6. It is essential that the next president be someone who understands America has an important role to play in promoting peace and to encourage others to understand the value of freedom, of free speech, free religion and the importance of the rule of law.
  7. But most importantly, the question each candidate must answer is whether you are prepared to bring dignity and honor to the office to which you have been elected.
  8. I think what's important is how much a person actually cares about other people. I got into politics because I do care about other people.
  9. I believe in self-reliance and independence, but I also believe we ought to help those in need, people who can't help themselves.
  10. It is either meant to be or not meant to be, that's how I view it. I feel pretty free. I'm a competitive person, but I feel free about it, because I'm a person who never grew up thinking, "Gosh, if only I'm my eighth-grade class president, I can parlay this into becoming the president of the United States."
  11. I think we all agree, the past is over.
  12. …Because he knows what many younger Americans know. We can do better in Washington D.C. We can have new leadership in Washington D.C., leadership that will lift this country's spirits and raise our sights. [He] knows what thousands of other youngsters know, that just because the White House has let us done in the past, that doesn't mean it's going to happen in the future
  13. The people and their soldiers are working and fighting today, not only for the present, but for the coming, nay the most distant, generations. A historical revision on a unique scale has been imposed on us by the Creator. …
  14. I didn't wake up when I was 15 years old saying, I really want to be president. I didn't feel that way at 21, 31, 41.
  15. People shouldn't vote for me because of my religion.
  16. If freedom is short of weapons, we must compensate with willpower
  17. And my job -- my job -- is to convince the American people I've got the judgment, the decision-making capability, that I'll bring a good administration of smart, capable people to Washington, that I can change the culture to get something done.
  18. My message is to the people. And my job is to convince them I've got the judgment and the decision-making capabilities and the wisdom to become their president
  19. Well, I'm just saying, you can disagree on issues, we'll debate issues, but whatever you do, don't equate my integrity and trustworthiness to [the current president]. That's about as low a blow as you can give in a primary
  20. [My wife’s] got a common sense about her that I obviously found appealing and still find appealing after all these years of marriage. I do trust her judgment. She's got -- she can read people well. And she's very much a part. She knows exactly what's on my mind.
  21. Faith is not just something you have, it's something you do.
  22. But the second thing was, can an administration change the tone in Washington? And I believe the answer is yes, I do. It's going to take a lot of hard work. But a president can help purge the system of this kind of "gotcha" politics and pile-on politics
  23. I will set a tone that is different from Washington, that says we can unite rather than divide, that this kind of finger-pointing and tearing down -- you know exactly what I'm talking about. I mean, it's just a bitter atmosphere.
  24. I begin with the young. We older ones are used up but my magnificent youngsters! Are there finer ones anywhere in the world? Look at all these men and boys! What material! With you and I, we can make a new world.
  25. We want to fill our culture again with the Christian spirit
  26. And I gave a speech to the National Committee fund- raiser, and I said both folks are to blame. I mean, there's blame to go around. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't be, you know, kind of mired in this type of environment forever.
  27. And I think I'm going to win, I do. I can feel it out there amongst the people, because they want something different. They're looking for somebody who can unite our nation and set a different tone in Washington.
  28. We want the people to be peace-loving, but also to be courageous.
  29. I think there's a lot of kids who are disillusioned right now. I frankly think that what's taken place in Washington the last couple of years has tended to disillusion children and young voters.
  30. If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot just so long as I'm the dictator
  31. I say: my feeling as a Christian points me to my Lord and Saviour as a fighter. In boundless love as a Christian and as a man I read through the passage which tells us how the Lord at last rose in His might and seized the scourge to drive out of the Temple the brood of vipers and of adders. . As a Christian I have no duty to allow myself to be cheated, but I have the duty to be a fighter for truth and justice
  32. If freedom is short of weapons, we must compensate with willpower
  33. So we have come together on this day to prove symbolically that we are more than a collection of individuals striving one against another, that none of us is too proud, none of us too high, none is too rich, and none too poor, to stand together before the face of the Lord and of the world in this indissoluble, sworn community. And this united nation, we have need of it.
  34. We too, have deep in our hearts our own faith.
  35. If we pursue this way, if we are decent, industrious, and honest, if we so loyally and truly fulfill our duty, then it is my conviction that in the future as in the past the Lord God will always help us. In the long run He never leaves decent folk in the lurch. Often He may test them, He may send trials upon them, but in the long run He always lets His sun shine upon them once more and at the end He gives them His blessing.
  36. God helps only those who are prepared and determined to help themselves.
  37. In the course of my life I have very often been a prophet, and have usually been ridiculed for it
  38. If positive Christianity means love of one's neighbour, i.e. the tending of the sick, the clothing of the poor, the feeding of the hungry, the giving of drink to those who are thirsty, then it is we who are the more positive Christians.
  39. The judgment whether a people is virtuous or not virtuous can hardly be passed by a human being. That should be left to God.
  40. [I] never lost my belief, in the midst of setbacks which were not spared me during my period of struggle
  41. If a nation forgets itself as completely as [we] did at that time, if it thinks that it can shake off all honor and all good faith, Providence can do nothing but teach it a hard and bitter lesson. But even at that time we were convinced that once our nation found itself again, once it again became industrious and honorable, once each individual … stood up for his nation first and not for himself, once he placed the interests of the community above his own personal interests, once the whole nation again pursued a great ideal, once it was prepared to stake everything for this ideal, the hour would come when the Lord would declare our trials at an end.
  42. I may not be a light of the church, a pulpiteer, but deep down I am a pious man
  43. I am now as before a [Christian] and will always remain so
  44. Politics is history in the making.
  45. One of our most important tasks will be to save future generations from a similar political fate
  46. The [colonizers] have carried to these (colonial) people the worst that they could carry: the plagues of the world: materialism, fanaticism, alcoholism, and syphilis. Moreover, since what these people possessed on their own was superior to anything we could give them, they have remained themselves... The sole result of the activity of the colonizers is: they have everywhere aroused hatred
  47. Parallel to the training of the body a struggle against the poisoning of the soul must begin. Our whole public life today is like a hothouse for sexual ideas and simulations. Just look at the bill of fare served up in our movies and you will hardly be able to deny that this is not the right kind of food, particularly for the youth … Theater, art, literature, cinema, press, posters, and window displays must be cleansed of all manifestations of our rotting world and placed in the service of a moral, political, and cultural idea
  48. Faith is harder to shake than knowledge, love succumbs less to change than respect, hate is more enduring than aversion, and the impetus to the mightiest upheavals on this earth has at all times consisted less in a scientific knowledge dominating the masses than in a fanaticism which inspired them and sometimes in a hysteria which drove them forward
  49. The desire for freedom resides in every human heart. And that desire cannot be contained forever by prison walls, or martial laws, or secret police. Over time, and across the Earth, freedom will find a way.
  50. I do believe in the sanctity of marriage. ...But I don't see that as conflict with being a tolerant person or an understanding person.
  51. Our economic dependence depended on individual initiative. It depended on a belief in the free market; but it has also depended on our sense of mutual regard for each other, the idea that everybody has a stake in the country, that we’re all in it together and everybody’s got a shot at opportunity. That’s what’s produced our unrivaled political stability.
  52. We have to put a stop to the idea that it is a part of everybody's civil rights to say whatever he pleases.
  53. Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. ... Because it’s only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.
  54. Throughout American history, there have been moments that call on us to meet the challenges of an uncertain world, and pay whatever price is required to secure our freedom. They are the soul-trying times our forbearers spoke of, when the ease of complacency and self-interest must give way to the more difficult task of rendering judgment on what is best for the nation and for posterity, and then acting on that judgment – making the hard choices and sacrifices necessary to uphold our most deeply held values and ideals.
  55. But today, our leaders in Washington seem incapable of working together in a practical, commonsense way. Politics has become so bitter and partisan, so gummed up by money and influence, that we can't tackle the big problems that demand solutions.
  56. I know that I haven't spent a lot of time learning the ways of Washington, but I've been there long enough to know that the ways of Washington must change. People who love their country can change it.
  57. For a people, as for an individual, it is tragic to have ambitions and to lack both the means essential to their fulfillment and any hope of acquiring those means.
  58. So what I have to do is just make sure that I'm delivering the message that we think the American people are ready for, that we want fundamental change, not just tinkering around the edges. I think the country wants to be brought together; they want to get past the petty partisan bickering. I think they want a politics that gets beyond sort of the special interest-driven politics that we've become accustomed to.
  59. We are a people of different faiths, but we are one
  60. Let us pray in this hour that nothing can divide us, and that God will help us
  61. The Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and cooperation. It will preserve and defend those basic principles on which our nation has been built. It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality, and the family as the basis of national life.
  62. We want honestly to earn the resurrection of our people through our industry, our perseverance, our will.
  63. Whether it's Vietnam or the sexual revolution or civil rights, you know, we have been caught up in the same old arguments for decades now. And one of the strong beliefs I have about this campaign is that the country wants to get beyond some of those conventional, partisan battles and cultural wars, and start solving problems.
  64. I just want all of you to pray that I can be an instrument of God. . . We’re going to keep on praising together. I am confident that we can create a Kingdom right here on Earth.
  65. My faith plays a big part in my life. And when I was answering that question what I was really saying to the person was that I pray a lot. And I do. And my faith is a very, it's very personal. I pray for strength. I pray for wisdom. I pray for our troops in harm's way. I pray for my family. I pray for my little girls.
  66. It took a lot of blood, sweat and tears to get to where we are today, but we have just begun. Today we begin in earnest the work of making sure that the world we leave our children is just a little bit better than the one we inhabit today.
  67. I am a Christian.… So, I have a deep faith. I'm rooted in the Christian tradition. I believe that there are many paths to the same place, and that is a belief that there is a higher power, a belief that we are connected as a people.
  68. That there are values that transcend race or culture, that move us forward, and there's an obligation for all of us individually as well as collectively to take responsibility to make those values lived
  69. After all, the problems of poverty and racism, the uninsured and the unemployed, are not simply technical problems in search of the perfect ten point plan. They are rooted in both societal indifference and individual callousness - in the imperfections of man.
  70. What's relevant is that I have learned from any mistakes that I made. I do not want to send signals to anybody that what [I] did [some] years ago is cool to try.
  71. Life is hard for many, but it is hardest if you are unhappy and have no faith. Have faith. Nothing can make me change my own belief.
  72. Solving these problems will require changes in government policy, but it will also require changes in hearts and a change in minds.
  73. Like no other illness, AIDS tests our ability to put ourselves in someone else's shoes -- to empathize with the plight of our fellow man. While most would agree that the AIDS orphan or the transfusion victim or the wronged wife contracted the disease through no fault of their own, it has too often been easy for some to point to the unfaithful husband or the promiscuous youth or the gay man and say "This is your fault. You have sinned." I don't think that's a satisfactory response. My faith reminds me that we all are sinners.
  74. God is not on the side of any nation, yet we know He is on the side of justice. Our finest moments [as a nation] have come when we faithfully served the cause of justice for our own citizens, and for the people of other lands.
  75. History is moving, and it will tend toward hope, or tend toward tragedy.
  76. We have a stake in one another ... what binds us together is greater than what drives us apart, and ... if enough people believe in the truth of that proposition and act on it, then we might not solve every problem, but we can get something meaningful done for the people with whom we share this Earth
  77. Human aspirations are universal-for dignity, for freedom, for the opportunity to improve the lives of our families.
  78. Let us recognize what unites us across borders and build on the strength of this blessed country. Let us embrace our history and our legacy. Let us not only define our values in words and carry them out in deeds.
  79. And it indicates that people are really ready for a message for change. What they want is somebody who has a positive message, who has a tone in their politics that says, "We can disagree with the other side without being disagreeable."
  80. We have a long history of reform movements being grounded in that sense often religiously expressed that we have to extend beyond ourselves and our individual immediate self-interests to think about something larger.
  81. Our values should express themselves not just through our churches or synagogues, temples or mosques; they should express themselves through our government. Because whether it's poverty or racism, the uninsured or the unemployed, war or peace, the challenges we face today are not simply technical problems in search of the perfect ten-point plan. They are moral problems, rooted in both societal indifference and individual callousness--in the imperfections of man. And so long as we're not doing everything in our personal and collective power to solve them, we know the conscience of our nation cannot rest.
  82. As I travel around the country, people have an urgent desire for change in Washington. We are not going to fix anything unless we change how business is done in Washington. Part of that is bringing people together. But part of it is also overcoming special interests & lobbyists who are writing legislation that's critical to the American people. And one of the things I bring is a perspective that says: Washington has to change.
  83. There's a way to accomplish the separation of church and state, and at the same time, accomplish the social objective of having America become a hopeful place, and a loving place.
  84. My stepfather said, "Men take advantage of weakness in other men. They're just like countries in that way. The strong man takes the weak man's land. He makes the weak man work in his fields. If the weak man's woman is pretty, the strong man will take her. Which would you rather be? Better to be strong. If you can't be strong, be clever and make peace with someone who's strong. But always better to be strong yourself. Always."
  85. What I'm talking about is ending the divisive politics that we have in this country. I think it is important for us ... to be clear about what we stand for. But I think we also have to invite [the other party] to join us in a progressive agenda for universal health care, to make sure that they are included in conversations about improving our education system and properly funding our public schools. I think turning the page means that we've got to get over the special interest-driven politics that we've become accustomed to. And most importantly it's important for us to make sure that we're telling the truth to the American people about the choices we face.
  86. You know what's interesting about Washington? It's the kind of place where second-guessing has become second nature.
  87. America has never been an empire. We may be the only great power in history that had the chance, and refused – preferring greatness to power and justice to glory.
  88. …The God I know is one that promotes peace and freedom. But I get great sustenance from my personal relationship. That doesn't make me think I'm a better person than you are, by the way. Because one of the great admonitions in the Good Book is, don't try to take a speck out of your eye if I've got a log in my own
  89. I believe that God wants me to be president.
  90. I know that change is possible. I know where hope leads us. The only reason I'm standing here before you is because of hope. I know what's possible in America. When I talk about hope, it isn't just the rhetoric of a campaign; it's been the cause of my life, a cause I will work for and fight for every single day as your president.
  91. I think it is a worthy goal in America to have every child protected by law and welcomed in life. I also think we ought to continue to have good adoption law as an alternative to abortion.
  92. America has never been united by blood or birth or soil. We are bound by ideals that move us beyond our backgrounds, lift us above our interests and teach us what it means to be citizens.
  93. For too long, many nations, including my own, tolerated, even excused, oppression in the Middle East in the name of stability. Oppression became common, but stability never arrived. We must take a different approach. We must help the reformers of the Middle East as they work for freedom, and strive to build a community of peaceful, democratic nations.
  94. American foreign policy must be more than the management of crisis. It must have a great and guiding goal: to turn this time of American influence into generations of democratic peace.
  95. Americans are a free people, who know that freedom is the right of every person and the future of every nation. The liberty we prize is not America's gift to the world; it is God's gift to humanity.

Now, I'm not saying that Barack is like GWeeB or Hitler but I'm just saying.
I would like to point out in 2000 I called Bush leading us into a war (something about presidents from Texas) and that he was the AntiChrist so...just consider me a Erich Ludendorff

some of the sources:

oh and Barack hates old people…not really related but I’m trying to cut back on negativity in the new Year so I had to put that out there now in this dying polluted one.
Now, talk amongst yourselves.

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Saturday, December 29, 2007

My New Addiction

I woke up this morning at like 5:30 after a rather horrible night of sleep and try as hard as I did I couldn’t fall back to sleep. I had wanted to continue reading The Subtle Knife but it was too dark and I didn’t want to turn on the lights so I turned on the laptop and turned down the brightness and checked out the hometown paper.
I was drawn to an article titled something like (at least in my mind) Barack"I'm a demagogue" Obama following Edwards’ lead and suddenly spouting populist ideals (Obama Moves onto Edwards' Turf). So I read for a few paragraphs (even though at this point I actually cannot stand to see his face)And I think it was at the pint where Barack “All Sizzle-Steal Someone Else’s Steak) Obama said something like his grandma lives in a hut in Kenya when I just got incensed and had to quickly leave that article before I started screaming harsh obscenities at my computer that early in the morning. SO i went to explore what the LA Times deemed “things to watch on the Web in 2008” so I could be on the cutting edge, y’know.
Anyway as I was reading it it reminded me of something I had heard the Prom Queen mini web series that Eisner was making and since I was nowhere close to getting out of bed I decided to give it a whirl and check them out. I didn’t watch them originally because it was on MySpace and MySpace is creepy but I figured at this point they would be on youtube and so “safe.”
So instead of next year’s hot new thing I stumbled late on to this year’s thing. And OMG it was so fucking addictive. I found that they compiled each week’s worth of episodes into one video to watch and the individual episodes are so short you don’t feel like it’s taking so much of your time to watch and so you keep watching (kinda like snacking on those 100 Calorie snack packs.)
And it really is such a delicious drama that I at first though was disposable but I couldn’t not see what would happen or what secrets everyone was hiding. Awesome. Simply awesome.
SO here are all the episodes from "Prom Queen" broken down into their 12 week compilations (sorry about the Hairspray commercials-those were really really annoying)

Week 2

Week 3

Week 4

Week 5

Week 6

Week 7

Week 8

Week 9

Week 10

Week 11: The Prom (!!!!!!)

Week 12

(My high school didn’t have Prom Court or Senior Superlatives actually-I guess admin felt it would either end up being too competitive (with the type A+s) or that no one would actually care. Probably to spare people’s feelings I guess...)
So Danica did all of that? Her alter? What? And what was up with Nolan (and that guy who looked like a cross between an ugly Brad Pitt and the Beast from that old tv series)? Ugh I’m hooked and I have to watch Summer Heat now (I’m so excited! I can’t hardly wait)

And of the music in it I really enjoyed the rising of tension because of the discordant sounds but I think I was sucked into the drama of the moment because I really liked that song at Prom that’s playing after Jill is shot; it’s called The Feast (spring Roses) by China Room and my favorite “song” the one that played every time whatsername was cutting was I Won’t Let You Down by Mulally - I really like that one

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Tuesday, December 25, 2007

It's A Wonderful Life

Sparklehorse- It’s a Wonderful Life [download]

y’know sometimes it really is. a wonderful life.

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Fairytale of New York

It was Christmas Eve babe
In the drunk tank
An old man said to me, won't see another one
And then he sang a song
The Rare Old Mountain Dew
I turned my face away
And dreamed about you

Got on a lucky one
Came in eighteen to one
I've got a feeling
This year's for me and you
So happy Christmas
I love you baby
I can see a better time
When all our dreams come true

They've got cars big as bars
They've got rivers of gold
But the wind goes right through you
It's no place for the old
When you first took my hand
On a cold Christmas Eve
You promised me
Broadway was waiting for me

You were handsome
You were pretty
Queen of New York City
When the band finished playing
They howled out for more
Sinatra was swinging,
All the drunks they were singing
We kissed on a corner
Then danced through the night

The boys of the NYPD choir
Were singing "Galway Bay"
And the bells were ringing out
For Christmas day

You're a bum
You're a punk
You're an old slut on junk
Lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed
You scumbag, you maggot
You cheap lousy faggot
Happy Christmas your arse
I pray God it's our last

I could have been someone
Well so could anyone
You took my dreams from me
When I first found you
I kept them with me babe
I put them with my own
Can't make it all alone
I've built my dreams around you

The boys of the NYPD choir
Still singing "Galway Bay"

And the bells were ringing out
For Christmas day

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Monday, December 24, 2007

Twas The Night...

before Christmas and all through that jazz

Here is Mary K Mart the mistress and hostess of the too much fun Drag Bingo in Durham (which I wrote a huge paper on) doing her "Trailer Park" version of the classic "A Visit from St. Nicholas (The Night Before Christmas)" at Flex, a gay club in Raleigh

and here are a few of the hundreds/thousands/millions of re-tellings and reinterpretations
Edwin S. Porter’s 1905 version


Tom & Jerry

Tay Zonday

Al Bundy’s

Blue Collar Comedy

A Cajun Night Before Christmas

John Cleese

and a few rather random ones (by real people!)

by Kaia

some college kids

The Stallions


and Barcelona Edition

I think we’re all lucky I have no follow through and didn’t do my Yiddish version- it’s a Christmas miracle!

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Who Could Be Sacred of Santy Claus

obviously not this guy

but apparently every small child that's ever lived

and you can see hundreds more here or here; it's an epidemic. I do feel I'll still make my kids meet Santa every year and sit on his lap just so they would cry and I could laugh.I mean what else are kids good for, besides amusement?

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Christmas Presents: The "Santa Died For Your Sins" Mix

John Lennon- Happy Christmas (War Is Over)
The Pogues with Kirsty MacColl-Fairytale of New York
Mariah Carey- All I Want For Christmas Is You
The White Stripes-Candy Cane Children
Mannheim Steamroller- Carol Of The Bells
Death Cab for Cutie-Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)
The White Stripes-The Singing of Silent Night
Neko Case- Christmas Card from a Hooker In Minneapolis
Tom Waits- Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis
Sufjan Stevens- Only At Christmas Time
The Vandals- My First X-Mas (As a Woman)
James Brown-Santa Claus Go Straight to the Ghetto
Sufjan Stevens- That Was The Worst Christmas Ever!
Aimee Mann-Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
Robert Earl Keen- Merry Christmas From the Family

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Yes,Virginia,There is a Santa Claus

By Francis P. Church, first published in The New York Sun in 1897.

We take pleasure in answering thus prominently the communication below, expressing at the same time our great gratification that its faithful author is numbered among the friends of The Sun:

Dear Editor—

I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, “If you see it in The Sun, it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus?

Virginia O’Hanlon

Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

(more info)

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A Very Special Holiday Episode

Here are a few Holiday episodes from shows that were a little before my time, but thanks to the wonders of hulu..voila

McHale's Navy- The Day They Captured Santa (season 1 episode 11)

The Bob Newhart Show- His Busiest Season (season 1 episode 14)

The Mary Tyler Moore Show- Christmas and the Hard Luck Kid (season 1 episode 14)

Alfred Hitchcock Presents - Back for Christmas (season 1 episode 23)

Lou Grant- Christmas (season 1 episode 13) [and I had honestly never heard of this show]

Picket Fences-High Tidings (season 1 episode 12)

and (just for kicks and because it's possible) here's 30 Rock's "Ludachristmas"

keep ho ho hoing

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Sunday, December 23, 2007

Five Years

Pushing thru the market square, so many mothers sighing
News had just come over, we had five years left to cry in
News guy wept and told us, earth was really dying
Cried so much his face was wet, then I knew he was not lying
I heard telephones, opera house, favourite melodies
I saw boys, toys electric irons and T.V.'s
My brain hurt like a warehouse, it had no room to spare
I had to cram so many things to store everything in there
And all the fat-skinny people, and all the tall-short people
And all the nobody people, and all the somebody people
I never thought I'd need so many people

A girl my age went off her head, hit some tiny children
If the black hadn't a-pulled her off, I think she would have killed them
A soldier with a broken arm, fixed his stare to the wheels of a Cadillac
A cop knelt and kissed the feet of a priest, and a queer threw up at the sight of that

I think I saw you in an ice-cream parlour, drinking milk shakes cold and long
Smiling and waving and looking so fine, don't think
you knew you were in this song
And it was cold and it rained so I felt like an actor
And I thought of Ma and I wanted to get back there
Your face, your race, the way that you talk
I kiss you, you're beautiful, I want you to walk

We've got five years, stuck on my eyes
Five years, what a surprise
We've got five years, my brain hurts a lot
Five years, that's all we've got
We've got five years, what a surprise
Five years, stuck on my eyes
We've got five years, my brain hurts a lot
Five years, that's all we've got
We've got five years, stuck on my eyes
Five years, what a surprise
We've got five years, my brain hurts a lot
Five years, that's all we've got
We've got five years, what a surprise
We've got five years, stuck on my eyes
We've got five years, my brain hurts a lot
Five years, that's all we've got
Five years
Five years
Five years
Five years
David Bowie- Five Years [download]

I can’t believe I forgot it on Friday but in those last few minutes of sleep this morning I’m not sure why my mind drifted to it but I either remembered the December 21, 2012 Mayan Prophecy or that David Bowie song (sung above in his Thin White Duke glory) 5 years but no matter in what order it came, there may be less than 5 years until apocalypse or rebirth or something. It doesn’t matter much though either way; I always love a good mystery and always work better under deadline.

Here's a short "crackpot" video:
(p.s. you'll probably want to turn down the volume for this)

And though that was incredibly cheesy and right wing (admittedly I can see Barack being The Anti-Christ[UPDATE: I'm glad I'm not the only one]) it did spark some more research on my own, and even though with things as vague or malleable as prophecies they can be twisted to fit any time it was still really [interesting/worrying] intriguing.

Pole Shift Theory
One early popular proponent of a pole shift theory was Hugh Auchincloss Brown, an electrical engineer who advanced a theory of catastrophic pole shift. Brown argued that accumulation of ice at the poles caused recurring tipping of the axis in cycles of approximately 7 millennia.

Charles Hapgood is now perhaps the best remembered early proponent, from in his books The Earth's Shifting Crust (1958) (which includes a foreword by Albert Einstein) and Path of the Pole (1970). Hapgood speculated that the ice mass at one or both poles over-accumulates which destabilizes the earth's rotational balance, causing slippage of all or much of earth's outer crust around the earth's core, which retains its axial orientation. Based on his own research, he argued that each shift took approximately five thousand years, followed by 20 to 30 thousand year periods with no polar movements. Also, in his calculations, the area of movement never covered more than 40 degrees. His examples of recent locations for the North Pole include the Yukon Territory, Hudson Bay, and in the Atlantic Ocean between Iceland and Norway.

This is an example of slow pole shift motion, which displays the most minor alterations and no destruction. A more dramatic view assumes more rapid changes, with dramatic alterations of geography and localized areas of destruction due to earthquakes and tsunamis. Several recent books propose changes that take place in weeks, days, or even hours, resulting in a variety of doomsday scenarios.

Regardless of speed, the results of a shift occurring results in major climate changes for most of the earth's surface, as areas that were formerly equatorial become temperate, and areas that were temperate become either more equatorial or more arctic.

Hapgood wrote to Canadian librarian, Rand Flem-Ath, encouraging him in his pursuit of scientific evidence to back Hapgood's claim and in his expansion of the theory. Flem-Ath published the results of this work in 1995 in When the Sky Fell co-written with his wife, Rose.

Other theories which are not dependent upon polar ice masses include those involving:

* a high-velocity asteroid or comet which hits Earth at such an angle that the lithosphere moves independent of the mantle
* a high-velocity asteroid or comet which hits Earth at such an angle that the entire planet shifts axis.
* an unusually magnetic celestial object which passes close enough to Earth to temporarily reorient the magnetic field, which then “drags” the lithosphere about a new axis of rotation. Eventually, the sun's magnetic field again determines the Earth's, after the intruding celestial object “returns” to a location from which it cannot influence Earth.
* perturbations of the topography of the core-mantle boundary, perhaps induced by differential core rotation and shift of its axial rotation vector, leading to CMB mass redistributions.
* mass redistributions in the mantle from mantle avalanches or other deformations.

Nostradamus' Quatrain 10 72 interpreted to be NIBIRU a comet to strike Earth around the year 2012

The Prophecy of St. Malachy and his 112 popes and coming from a 12th Century Bishop the last few popes and prophecies seem to match up eerily enough

  • 258 Leo XIII (1878-1903) 102 Lumen in cælo(Light in the Heavens)
    • Hist.: Leo XIII wrote encyclicals on Catholic social teaching that were still being digested 100 years later. He added considerably to theology.
  • 259 St. Pius X (1903-1914) 103 Ignis ardens (ardent fire)
    • Hist.: The Pope had great personal piety and achieved a number of important reforms in the devotional and liturgical life of priests and laypeople.
  • 260 Benedict XV (1914-1922) 104 Religio depopulata (Religion laid waste)
    • Hist.: This Pope reigned during the Bolshevik Revolution in Russia which store the establishment of Communism.
  • 261 Pius XI (1922-1939) 105 Fides intrepida (Intrepid faith)
    • Hist.: This Pope stood up to Fascist and Communist forces lining up against him in the lead up to World War II.
  • 262 Pius XII (1939-1958) 106 Pastor angelicus (Angelic Shepherd)
    • Hist.: This Pope was very mystical, and is believed to have received visions. People would kneel when they received telephone calls from him. His encyclicals add enormously to the understanding of Catholic beliefs (even if they are now overlooked because of focus on the Second Vatican Council, which occurred so soon after his reign).
  • 263 John XXIII (1958-1963) 107 Pastor et Nauta (pastor and marine)
    • Hist.: prior to his election he was patriarch of Venice, a marine city, home of the gondolas
  • 264 Paul VI (1963-1978) 108 Flos florum (flower of flowers)
    • Hist.: his arms displayed three lilies.
  • 265 John Paul I (1978) 109 De medietate Lunæ (of the half of the moon)
    • Hist.: Albino Luciani, born in Canale d'Agardo, diocese of Belluno, (beautiful moon) Elected pope on August 26, his reign lasted about a month, from half a moon to the next half...
  • 266 John Paul II (1978-2005) 110 De labore Solis (of the eclipse of the sun, or from the labour of the sun)
    • Hist.: Karol Wojtyla was born on May 18, 1920 during a solar eclipse. He also comes from behind the former Iron Curtain (the East, where the Sun rises). He might also be seen to be the fruit of the intercession of the Woman Clothed with the Sun labouring in Revelation 12 (because of his devotion to the Virgin Mary). His Funeral occurred on 8 April, 2005 when there was a solar eclipse visible in the Americas.
  • 267 Benedict XVI (2005-) 111 Gloria olivæ
    • The Benedictine order traditionally said this Pope would come from their order, since a branch of the Benedictine order is called the Olivetans. St Benedict is said to have prophesied that before the end of the world, a member of his order would be Pope and would triumphantly lead the Church in its fight against evil. While the Holy Father chose the name "Benedict", this does not seem enough to fulfil the prophecy. Nor is it clear how Benedict XVI (a Bavarian) is "Glory of the Olives". Since he is said to have remarked in the Conclave after saying he would take the name Benedict that it was partly to honour Benedict XV, a pope of peace and reconciliation, perhaps Benedict XVI will be a peacemaker in the Church or in the World, and thus carry the olive branch.

And the next prophecy for Pope 112? Petrus Romanus?
In persecutione extrema S.R.E. sedebit Petrus Romanus, qui pascet oves in multis tribulationibus: quibus transactis civitas septicollis diruetur, & Judex tremêdus judicabit populum suum. Finis.
(In extreme persecution, the seat of the Holy Roman Church will be occupied by Peter the Roman, who will feed the sheep through many tribulations, at the term of which the city of seven hills will be destroyed, and the formidable Judge will judge his people. The End.)

Hmm, I think I may go check out Berea, Kentucky

“It is the end of the world, as we know it - nothing more and nothing less.”
In a way that is a horribly exciting and comforting thought

and yeah I know that it’s probably not going to happen , but it’s fun to think so.
Anyway we’re all peacing out by the year 1 mil so drink and be merry for (on some) tomorrow we die.
Carpe diem that shit and que sera, sera

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Friday, December 21, 2007

Your Stuck in my Head Song of the Day

Your Stuck in My Head Song of the Days is Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You” and I know it’s cheesy and cliché but it is a great fun festive song and I’m allowed to be girly. Though if it helps any of my “music cred” the other songs I was thinking about were Marilyn Manson’s “Cake and Sodomy” (and there’s some great footage of them “before they were big”) but I thought that may not fit the “season” (and at home over the next week I feel I’ll get plenty of cake; sodomy? Not so much)
and the song I was actually excited about doing for a while. It’s a song by The Vandals “My First X-Mas as a Woman” a song I think I first heard when I was like 13 on KROQ and one that immediately became a favorite of mine (hopefully at this point I don’t have to spell it out.)
And I was so excited because this year is really like my first Christmas as a Woman and it’s exiting and all and for the first time its true (besides the post-op stuff-I’m planning on that happening before my 10 year high school reunion so I have a few years left.)
But it’s a really fun song and I thought it would be perfect

With Christmas upon us it's time to be honest
and follow my dreams and to face
a life of delusion and gender confusion
no longer will be the case

I never wanted army men or basketballs,
I only wanted pantyhose and Barbie dolls
And dressing up in mother's clothing.

My whole life I've been feeling only feminine
It always seemed so useless trying to be a man
Now that's a ghost of Christmas past

Now it feels like the very first time,
cuz it's going to be the very first time,
that Christmas feels right to me.

And I know that I'm looking good
Just like a real girl should-
It's my first Christmas as a woman

A doctor reconstructed my genitals
And now I'm waiting underneath the mistletoe
for a guy who could love a girl like me.

I took the hormones and I got my breasts
This season's gonna be the best to me.

I won't have to tuck it behind me
Since I got my brand new vagina
It's my first Christmas as a woman.

Chop if off! Chop if off! Chop if off!
My penis, chop it off
It's no use to me.
Cut it off!
Chop it off! Chop it off!
My penis, cut it off so I can finally be
A Woman...

Now I'm finally happy cuz I made my goal
to be a post operation transsexual.
now I'm a pretty lady

Now it feels like the very first time,
cuz it's going to be the very first time,
that Christmas feels right to me.

Cuz I know that I'm looking good
Just like a real girl should-
It's my first Christmas as a woman

But unfortunately there wasn't a video for it (besides this) so I decided that Mariah Carey in her peak and Johnny Depp, together would be an appropriate gift in this season (and plus all really want for Christmas is YOU!) so here is “technically” Your Stuck in My Head Song of the Day- Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You”

(ok there may be some sporadic posts over the next week or so [or maybe forever if I decide I’m bored of this experiment] but this is my last real day of posting. So after a 50 post week, which was my record, here’s a 60+ post week. I think that’s a nice enough send off till the new year. )
It’s a Wonderful Life; enjoy it

The Vandals- My First X-Mas (As a Woman) [download] buy it on iTunes
The Vandals - Oi to the World - My First X-Mas (As a Woman)

Mariah Carey-All I Want for Christmas Is You [download] buy it on iTunes
Mariah Carey - Merry Christmas - All I Want for Christmas Is You

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It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere- "Baby Jesus Wants You Drunk" Edition

I mean he does. And these cocktail recipes should get you there (just like they did for Santy Claus)

Mulled Red Wine

8 whole cloves
4 whole black peppercorns
4 (3 x 1⁄2 inch) strips fresh lemon zest
4 (4 x 1⁄2 inch) strips fresh orange zest
4 cups dry red wine (from two 750 mil bottles)
1⁄2 cup kirsch or other cherry-flavored brandy
1 1⁄2 cups water
3⁄4 cup sugar
1 (3 inch) cinnamon stick
1 vanilla bean, halved lengthwise

Garnish: cinnamon sticks
Special equipment: a 4-inch square of cheesecloth; kitchen string

Put cloves, peppercorns, and zest on cheesecloth, then tie closed to form a bag.
Combine wine, kirsch, water, sugar, cinnamon stick, vanilla bean, and cheesecloth bag in a 4-quart saucepan and bring to a boil, stirring.

Simmer 10 minutes. Serve warm.

Hot Holiday Punch

2 Egg
2 tbs. Sugar
2 oz. Brandy

Beat egg yolks, sugar and brandy. Pour into two warmed glasses or punch cups. Fill with hot milk, stir and sprinkle with grated nutmeg. Preferably fresh.

Steaming Hot Holiday Punch

3 cups Apple Juice
1.5 tsp. ground Cinnamon
0 cinnamon stick
0.75 tsp. ground Cloves
6 cups Cranberry juice
0.75 cup Maple Syrup
0.75 tsp. ground Nutmeg
3 cups Orange Juice
2 tsp. Powdered Sugar

Combine all the ingredients in a very large heavy pan, except the cinnamon sticks. Bring to a boil and turn to simmer for few minutes. You can put the ingredients in a crockpot after it has boiled and keep warm over low heat.

Holiday Punch

2-48 oz. (1.36 L) cans pineapple juice
1-40 oz. (1.14 L) bottle cranberry juice
2-750 mL bottles soda water
1 litre strawberry, raspberry or lime sherbet
Fifth of.Vodka
In a punch bowl, mix juices. Pour in soda water. Top with scoops of sherbet.


-1⁄2 oz. Tequila
-1⁄2 oz. white crème de cacao
-1⁄2 oz. blue Curacao
-1⁄2 oz. cream

Pour ingredients into a mixing glass, shake, strain and serve in a chilled glass.

Christmas Love

1⁄4 oz. brandy
1 oz. sherry
Dash of lemon juice
1 sugar cube
3 oz sparkling white wine

Pour brandy and sherry in a flute glass, and stir in the lemon juice and sugar. Stir until sugar dissolves, and refrigerate. When you are ready to serve, add the sparkling wine.

Three Wise Men

1⁄2 oz. bourbon whiskey
1⁄2 oz. Tennessee whiskey
1⁄2 oz. Scotch whisky

Put ingredients in a glass, drink.

The Cranberry Celebration

3 oz. cranberry juice
2 juice
1/8 oz. lime cordial soda water
frozen cranberries
11⁄2 oz vodka

In a cocktail shaker filled with ice, combine 3 oz cranberry juice, 2 oz orange juice and 1/8 oz lime cordial. Shake sharply and strain into a collins glass filled with ice. Top with soda water and sprinkle with frozen cranberries

The Chocolate Milk Whip

4 oz.chocolate milk
2 oz. cold coffee
whipped cream
shaved chocolate
2 oz. Bailey's

Fill a tall glass with ice. Add 4 oz. chocolate milk and 2 oz. cold coffee and Bailey's. Top with whipped cream and garnish with shaved chocolate.

Feel Like Holiday

1 cl.Vodka
1 cl. Grenadine
100 ml. Champagne

Stir Vodka and Grenadine with Ice. Fill in a champagne glass without the ice and fill up witch champagne.

Black Santa
Liqueur, coffee 3/4 oz.
Schnapps, peppermint 1/4 oz.
Vodka 1/2 oz.

Pour the vodka and Kahlua coffee liqueur into an old-fashioned glass half-filled with ice cubes. Add the peppermint schnapps and serve.

Jäger Nog

Jägermeister 1 part
Eggnog 1 part
Cinnamon 1 sprinkle
Pour equal parts eggnog and Jägermeister into glass. Sprinkle with cinnamon.

Candy Cane Martini

1/2 oz. vodka
1 tsp. peppermint schnapps

Mixing instructions:
Mix all ingredients with ice in a shaker. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass.
Option: Garnish with a small candy cane or create a candy cane "rimmer" with crushed candy canes.


2 oz. Midori
1/2 oz. lemon juice (fresh)
1 tsp. sugar syrup

Mix all ingredients with ice in a shaker. Strain into a chilled martini glass.
Option: Garnish this green drink with a red cherry.

Purple Jesus (I just really like that name)

1.0 oz Ginger Ale
2.0 oz Vodka
1.0 oz Grape Juice
Fill a Highball glass almost full with ice cubes. Pour all ingredients into Highball glass, stir well, and serve.

Santa Claus is Coming

0.5 oz. Cinnamon Schnapps
0.5 oz. Melon liqueur
0.5 oz. Rumplemintz
Layer in a large shot glass, top with whipped cream "snow".

Why Santa Has a Naughty List

Amaretto 1 oz.
Gin 1 oz.
Liqueur, banana 1 oz.
Grenadine 1/2 oz.
Sprite Fill with

Add gin and amaretto to a collins glass filled with ice. Fill almost full with sprite. Add grenadine slowly, then layer banana liqueur on top.

Santa’s Pole

1.0 fill with Lemon Lime Soda
2.0 splash Grenadine
1.0 shot Peppermint Schnapps
1.0 shot Vodka

Merry Christmas
1 oz. cranberry juice
1 tbsp. lemon juice
1 oz. Plymouth Gin
Schweppes ® Club Soda

Mixing instructions:
Stir the gin, cranberry and lemon juice in a highball glass filled with ice. Top up with soda.
Option: Sprinkle with dried, or fresh cranberries and a lemon wedge.

Drink and be merry...

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My, It's Been a Busy Year

good thing JibJab is here to help us all remember what happened
In 2007

There's no way 2008 can be worse.... in fact I feel it's going to be awesome starting the night of January 3rd...

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Liquid Fantasies: Things that are too cool/trendy for me

but I'd still like to taste or try

  • Soapstone and/or Granite Ice Cubes certainly take a scotch on the rocks to a literal level."Put rocks in your freezer and then in your drink, and they do the job of ice without diluting your whiskey" and all this time when I'd try to be old and classy and have a scotch on the rocks whenever I prayed for the ice to dilute it I was being sacrilegious. Good to know.
  • I think these are more up my alley. Just in time for the holidays come Candy Cane shot glasses."These glasses add a sweet minty flavour to your favorite shooters while keeping your breath minty fresh." and the best part, (besides the booze)? They're made out of 100% edible candy canes. I'm sure the kiddies will love those.
  • On second thought maybe the kids should stick to Vessel custom soda.
  • For less than a handle of liquor you too can own your very own "Lush Life Party Ice" Ice Luge. Ah that takes me back to that one time at the frat party where I got creeped out but the disgustingness of the ice luge.
  • I want "the best beer in the world" made by monks who've taken vows of silence. "Westvleteren “Trappist” can only be purchased in limited quantities, by placing an order on the monks “Beer Phone”. It’s a great example of ultra-premium anti-branding: the monks do no advertising, nor do they label the bottles. The beer, which costs from 22 euro a bottle, is available only once a month, and you can only order 2 cases of 24 bottles at a time. Remi Johnson of Boston’s Publick House calls the brew “the holy grail of beers." That really sounds like the classiest thing ever. Ok I've revised my final meal- I'll have Trappist with my ortolan-mmmmm
  • and finally I don't think this has anything to do with alcohol, and it is sad whenever someone dies, but this headline was too good to pass on "Roofing company billionaire dies after falling through roof."

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The Candidates' Christmas Commercials

because 'tis the season. And this will be the only time on this site where I give Equal Time, so enjoy...

Mike Huckabee (the waay too overanalyzed "subliminal cross" ad)

Rudy's “Holiday Wishes”

Rudy's "Same Gift"

Barack's "exploting my family" I mean "Friendship" (he would)

John McCain “ My Christmas Story"

Hillary's “Presents”

John Edward's Season

funny, they've all ended up being arranged in an ascending order of my candidate preference. It's a holiday miracle

(and on an almost related note, Wonkette has a list of the 10 Best Campaign Ads ever and it's pretty sweet)

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