Friday, August 24, 2007

Your Stuck in my Head Song(s) of the Day

So today I got really happy to the point I started crying. And it was all because of Facebook, well not all because of Facebook, but you'll see. Anyway I had friended a girl I went to middle school (and I thought some high school as well.) She was one of my favorite people back then and shameful for me I hadn't thought about her for many a year until then and I had actually forgotten her last name. Anyway today she accepted my request and she looks so happy and just like I remember and she's also a lesbian. And when I saw that I just got really happy, and I realized it was a similar emotion, of crying with joy, that I felt with the Christine Daniel's announcement. I guess it is the feeling that I'm not alone but also that there's another one "on our team." And like I said that made me so happy (along with the fact she had some pictures of another one of my really good friends from H-W) that I couldn't really contain it all without tears. I'm sure some of it was the fact that it continues my belief that all real lesbians are the nicest and my favorite people, but also that I'm not the only queer kid. Then The Cure's "Just Like Heaven" came on and it seemed perfect for my mood, like the one happy Cure song. And the idea of something being so good and beautiful and feeling you with enough happiness as to be comparable to our perception of heaven, well it's a good thought.

Then I read the lyrics and, yeah it's not as happy as I thought it was (I think). But the music is happy at least! I started thinking of our interactions in school and trying to remember if there were any "signs" though it is such a ludicrous statement (mainly on the basis I can't remember what happened a month ago.) And I'm sure if she was intrigued enough to check my profile she would realize she's not the only one who's "changed" and I started thinking could we ever have imagined where and who we are now back when we were 13. So I started thinking of songs that expressed that kind of idea of "wow who could've guessed" type vibe, but one that specific didn't come to mind (I'm beginning to slack with having a song at the ready for every occasion; maybe I'll just write one) though the idea that I really wanted to meet up with her (and she would be the 2nd person I know when i move to San Francisco!) made me think of the chorus of a Pulp song "let's all meet up in the year 2000. Won't it be strange when we're all fully grown" Yeah growing up is strange, but it's a beautiful thing. The song is Disco 2000 and (thinking about it the last time I may have seen her might have been around the year 2000.) So what do you say Chelsea, wanna meet up in the year 2000? I'm sure I can find a fountain down the road. Ah I really love how life turns out sometimes. It can be truly wonderful and beautiful with its surprises and paths(oh and back to the song; it's a really cool video)

Have a good weekend everyone. I'm going to spend it writing letters to people I haven't talked to in awhile ( I had planned on that long before today's events) and applying to jobs so I can actually afford to live. You all stay safe out there. buona fortuna a tutti

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