A Literal LOL

This actually made me laugh out loud, something which was exceedingly difficult today and that i thought might be impossible.

Brief setup: David, son to be internet superstar, just went to the dentist to hvae a tooth pulled and hilarity ensues


Ha! I mean, poor poor kid; in 15 years he's going to have to pay for that kind of high.

PJ Harvey- When Under Ether [mp3]

P.S. I love how words uttered the influence of pain meds can sometimes seem so profound. Y'know like the last words of Dutch Schultz; they're a bizarre and thus beautiful read

Sphere: Related Content

True Love Lives

awwww and I'd bet it lives on lollipops and crisps, too.


(the two loves are centered and on the right; the little sister was to be a witness)

It's a short but undeniably sweet story so I'll just yoink a lot of it (from The Daily Mail)

Police in Hanover, northern Germany, identified the pair only as Mika and Anna-Lena, who have different parents but now share a home in the city's suburbs after his father and her mother moved in together.

The story began on New Year's Eve when the family were watching a documentary about Africa and its wildlife.

'From this, the children began to make plans for the future,' said police spokesman Holger Jureczko.

The two youngsters were 'very much in love and decided to get married in Africa where it is warm, taking with them as a witness Anna-Lena's little sister Anna-Bell'.

As the first dawn of 2009 broke, the trio packed three suitcases with all the essentials for the journey, including sunglasses, swimming trunks, a lilo [air mattress], summer clothes and sandwiches made from chicken paste and processed cheese.

While their parents slept, they crept out of the house wrapped up against the freezing weather and walked two-thirds of a mile up the road to a tram stop from where they caught the service to the central station.

Waiting for a train to the airport 30 miles away, they attracted the attention of the guard, who contacted police.

Two officers managed to convince the young lovers that they would struggle to get to Africa without money or a plane ticket. 'They were very put out that they couldn't carry on their journey,' added Mr Jureczko.

'But they calmed down when they were promised a hot drink and some breakfast.'

As a further consolation, the children were given a tour of police headquarters where they were 'especially taken with the detention cells'.

Their relieved parents picked them up from the station, said Mr Jureczko, adding: 'They can still put their plan into action at a later date.'

awwww...my ovaries are aching

Sphere: Related Content

When Barack is President...

life will be like one long trip On the Good Ship Lollipop

Yay! I can't hardly wait!

Sphere: Related Content

And don't you know that it's just you, hey Jude, you'll do

OMG alert this is probably the cutest thing ever
If the Beatles were to be begin today this kid would definitely be "The Cute One." Watch as he outshines Paul at his own song and performs Hey Jude

I love how he tries to hit that high scream that Paul does and of course he's little "L"s as "R"s
I want this kid-he's so heavy

Then you'll begin to make it
Better better better better better better, oh.

Na Na Na Na Na Na, Na Na Na

Sphere: Related Content

evoL in a Backward World

This film tells the story of a couple who spot each other across a crowded street and fall in love. Although everyone else in the world around them moves backwards, the couple moves forward as they find each other.

Directed by Chris Vincze. Starring: Rick Warden & Lucy Barker
Platinum Remi Award winnder, WorldFest film festival, Texas
First Place Winner, StudentFilmmakers Summer Shorts 2006
Shortlisted: Kodak Short Film Showcase 2006

And it gets my award for being totally adorable



love, love, love…

Sphere: Related Content

Oh Uno

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you
You'd be like Heaven to touch.
I wanna hold you so much.

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you

Sphere: Related Content

I Love This Dog

Uno! The Best Dog in the World! here he is on the Early Show

OMG it is the most perfect dog I've ever seen too. He's sooo cute I can barely stand it

Some other thoughts on last night at Westminster:

• I've decided I really want a long haired chihuaha- Paloma was so pretty last night
• The Pekingese may be the ugliest dog ever
• I didn't realize Great Danes are that chill that they could live in an apartment- that was surprising. Eva from last night was gorgeous.
• The Samoyed was just stunning and so pure and white
• The Tibetan mastiff from the working group had the most heart string adorable face ever
• The Neapolitian Mastiff, which apparently was the same breed as Fang from Harry Potter, was the scariest dog ever but I liked its gait
• The woman who judged the working dogs was so old as she went around calling them out and picking their order it was so slow but added so much drama
• My dog could never do any of the dog show stuff- he'd go around peeing on everything and barking. He does both a lot

Sphere: Related Content

OMG! Cuteness Overdose!

excuse me as I go all girly but AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW



and I adore the description on its College Humor page "This kitten was found nuzzling up to a sneezing bunny rabbit while a 5-year-old girl giggled and called them "aminals."

Sphere: Related Content

Monday Morning Cuteness

Oh, if this were my kid...

Ha! Such a natural born entertainer...I love it

Sphere: Related Content

Puppy Bowl IV: Get Excited

The best part of the super bowl; It’s not the game or the commercials.
It’s Puppy Bowl!

It’s actually counterprogramming to the real Super Bowl but it’s probably better and it is like the cutest thing ever. No wait, check that- it’s not like the cutest thing ever, it is the cutest thing ever.
Here are some clips from Puppy Bowl III , last year’s epic (The winner? I have no idea)
And they are all amazing

See and scout out the starting lineup
(my dog looks like Janet
And I love the halftime of Puppy Bowl where they have all the kitties


Just remember at halftime on Sunday turn on Animal Planet and check it out- you won’t regret it, unless you’re heartless. You’re not heartless are you?

Sphere: Related Content

Here's a monkey, dressed like a cowboy, riding a dog

that is all.


(and if you absolutely need background:
"A monkey shows off his sheep-herding skills on dog-back.

A dog in Fort Worth, Texas gets a case of whiplash - but the mutt doesn't seem to mind.

The audience at the Fort Worth Stock Show witnessed a new breed of cowboy put his trusted steed, a border collie, through his paces.

Whiplash is an 18-year-old capuchin monkey trained to ride border collies and herd sheep. ")
damn context.

Sphere: Related Content

Who Could Be Sacred of Santy Claus

obviously not this guy


but apparently every small child that's ever lived










and you can see hundreds more here or here; it's an epidemic. I do feel I'll still make my kids meet Santa every year and sit on his lap just so they would cry and I could laugh.I mean what else are kids good for, besides amusement?

Sphere: Related Content

Twin Baby Pandas at Play

aka "the most enticing setup ever" or simply the "Cutest. Thing. Ever."
My money's on the white and black one (not the black and white one)

I could watch that all day. I really want one. They're so frickin' cute . I mean can't we, with all of our technological advancements, clone pandas as like pets. I think that would be best for everyone because if I can't have a panda I don't want to be a part of your genomic revolution.
I'd settle for a panserbjørn though or better yet a panserbambusbjørn*; the cutest and deadliest thing at least since the Olsen Twins circa 1990 infected with plague**

*panserpanda(?)
**y'know, if they were

Sphere: Related Content

Monday Morning Cuteness

These actually really got me over my case of the Mondays.
I like when babies are assholes-so cute!


and I've decided I really like when babies curse-it may be my new favorite thing. I feel like I'd do this a lot with my kids


Fire Truck!


Cracker Truck!


so horrible I know, but it's so hilarious.

Sphere: Related Content

Monday Morning Cuteness

I really don't like Mondays, and after the weekend I just endured it's all the worse. Sometime I wish I were an alcoholic so I wouldn't have qualms about drinking when I wake up. I wish someone had taken the time to set me on that path when I was younger

Two things I found wrong about this video: 1- was there nothing else for her to play with? i mean we don't need her to start experimenting with alcohol soo early. Give her another twelve years. Though I guess she'll be an absolute champ in college.
and secondly, Heineken comes in a can? who knew.

And I really don't know why but this video continues to amuse me.I blame little asian babies for being so adorable.

Sphere: Related Content

Kid Nation-I Want Alex

I kinda really want to kidnap him. I mean he's soooo cute,he wears those shaded glasses, has that one big tooth in the front of his mouth, talks about things like futures and carbon dating, is half asian,totally confused everyone when he recieved his star, is so adorable and soo small I just want to hug him and hold him (and maybe transport him in a duffel bag)

I''m really glad they had an episode that focused on him- he's always been one of my favorites. But you know what was weird was that they are still spotlighting kids that you've never seen before, like Migle who I'm sure is a great girl and all (despite the unfortunateness of her name and the fact I don't know how to pronounce) but I would think at this point the producers would just dance with the ones who brung 'em. Though to be honest if I sent my kid away to be on some controversial reality show and then didn't have my kid seen on camera or talked to even once I would be quite pissed, so I think the producers may either release a dvd of deleted children, or maybe even better to have a compilation for each family of footage that focuses on their kid.
I was also absolutely shocked that Sophia actually was a kid last night and was swayed by the mob for the immediate enjoyment of the hot air balloons over the plaque (the one that choked up my absolute favorite Laurel) though I feel like the plaque will be left there anyway- I mean CBS already made it and why would they want to lug it back.

Not gonna lie before last night's episode I was really smelling a dramatic redemptive arc where Taylor who had been so vilified, justifiably so, would at the end change her ways and impress the council so much where she would get one of the last gold stars, and it could happen though that seems quite unlikely for the last episode, especially considering the number of good quiet kids who haven't gotten a gold star (but of course haven't really added much to the awesome wtfness of the show) I hope everyone in the town gets some type of gold star, even if it's smaller, just to have something to show. It seems only right.

Oh and speaking of gold stars everyone should hold onto them- gold is always rising in value. (I learned that from Alex- he's soooo cute.)

Sphere: Related Content

'Tis The Season

Tonight is the first night of Hanukkah (or Chanukah-that always confused me) so to those that are Jewish and to those that just like holidays and candles, Happy Hanukkah!

Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, asher kid'shanu b'mitzvotav v'tzivanu l'hadlik neir (shel) chanukah.
(Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe, Who sanctified us with His commandments and commanded us to kindle the Hanukkah lights.)

Sadly I think this is the most famous of Hanukkah songs, but it is really funny, makes me laugh every time I hear it still and Adam Sandler's finest moment (besides Happy Gilmore of course.) The Chanukah Song! Here he is performing it on SNL, which is probably the first version


Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, she-asah nisim la-avoteinu, bayamim haheim, (u)baz'man hazeh.
(Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, Who performed wondrous deeds for our ancestors, in those days, at this moment.)

The Story of Hannukah
About 2200 years ago, Greek kings, who reigned from Damascus, ruled over the land of Judea and the Jews living there.

One Greco-Syrian King, Antiochus Epiphanes, forbade the Jewish people from praying to their God, practicing their customs, and studying their Torah. Antiochus forced the Jews to worship the Greek gods. It is said that he placed an idol of the Greek God Zeus on the alter in the Holy Temple of Jerusalem.

In response to this persecution, Judah Maccabee and his four brothers organized a group of resistance fighters known as the Maccabees. They fought against paganism and oppression.

The tenacity of the rebels, which came from their steadfast faith in one God, is one reason this military victory has been so celebrated by Jews in future generations.

In one battle near Beit Horon, Judah's small army is intimidated by the size of the enemy army and Judah tells them to have faith that God is on their side:

But when they saw the army coming to meet them, they said unto Judah: 'What? shall we be able, being a small company, to fight against so great and strong a multitude? ...' And Judah said: 'It is an easy thing for many to be shut up in the hands of a few, and there is no difference in the sight of Heaven to save by many or by few; for victory in battle standeth not in the multitude of an host, but strength is from Heaven. They come unto us in fullness of insolence and lawlessness, to destroy us and our wives and our children, for to spoil us; but we fight for our lives and our laws. And He Himself will discomfort them before our face; but as for you, be yet not afraid of them." (The First Book of Maccabees)

Against great odds, after three years of fighting, the Maccabees succeeded to drive the Greco-Syrians out of Judea. Hanukkah proclaims the message of the prophet Zachariah: "Not by might, not by power, but by My spirit."

The Maccabees reclaimed the Holy Temple in Jerusalem. They cleaned the Temple, removing the Greek symbols and statues. When Judah and his followers finished cleaning the temple, they rededicated it. On the 25th day of the month of Kislev in 164 BCE, the Temple was purified and rededicated.

According to tradition, when the Maccabees entered the Holy Temple, they discovered that the Greco-Syrians had defiled the oil which was used to Temple's menorah. Only one vat of purified oil remained - enough for only one day. It would take the Jews a week to process more purified oil. Then a miracle occurred. The Maccabees lit the menorah and it burned for not one, but eight days, by which time the new, purified oil was ready. This is why the Hanukkah Menorah has eight candles (not including the shamash candle used to light the others) and one reason why Jews celebrate Hanukkah for eight days.

Baruch atah Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, shehecheyanu, v'kiyemanu, vehigi-anu laz'man hazeh.
(Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, Who has kept us in life, sustained us, and brought us to this moment.)
This is easily my favorite Hanukkah song, The Dreidel Song, and what could be better than it being sung by a kindergarten class?


Have an amazing Eight Days

Hanneirot hallalu anachnu madlikin 'al hannissim ve'al hanniflaot 'al hatteshu'ot ve'al hammilchamot she'asita laavoteinu bayyamim haheim, (u)bazzeman hazeh 'al yedei kohanekha hakkedoshim. Vekhol-shemonat yemei Hanukkah hanneirot hallalu kodesh heim, ve-ein lanu reshut lehishtammesh baheim ella lir'otam bilvad kedei lehodot ul'halleil leshimcha haggadol 'al nissekha ve'al nifleotekha ve'al yeshu'otekha.

(We light these lights for the miracles and the wonders, for the redemption and the battles that you made for our forefathers, in those days at this season, through your holy priests. During all eight days of Hanukkah these lights are sacred, and we are not permitted to make them serve except for to look at them in order to express thanks and praise to Your great Name for your miracles, Your wonders and Your salvations.)

Sphere: Related Content

Monday Morning Cuteness

for post 800 I decided to repost like the first actual entertaining thing I put up on on this site and one of my all time favorite videos. It is for Trigun, a company I know nothing about, besides they have a great sense of humor and advertising touch. AnywayI hadn't actually seen it since I posted it originally but it is still amazing, that kid is sooo adorable and doesn't this kinda sum up what mondays feel like? ain't life a kick in the pants?



FIN.

Sphere: Related Content

Story Pirates, Arrrggh!

After that last post I feel I need something pure and innocent and good to counteract the evil of the Republican Party and so I remembered a video from earlier this morning. After the Bud Light "Dude" commercial played a set of realted videos showed up and one seemed so random I clicked on it.
It's called "This Movie is About Cats Flying" and it is a little frightening

While I was watching I read the description and it piqued my interest more. You see "This story is about cats flying."
Based on this sentence by 8 year-old Jah-Kym McMillan, and adapted into a film short by The Story Pirates - a non-profit company that promotes a love of creative writing.
The Striking Viking Story Pirates (www.storypirates.com) adapt and perform stories written by kids as a way of celebrating the words and ideas of young people."

It seemed like such a great and fun idea, and I'm sure it must give the authors and their families such a thrill that I started watching most of the videos that they've posted out of happiness and so I thought you should enjoy them as well.
Here is "Abby is Sile" written by 6 year old Sofia Morales-Bello Barcelo

(And you may have noticied as I did that Abby looks familiar. So I checked out the Pirates' bios and found out it's Kristen Schaal the one fan of Flight of The Conchords.)
The Day I Got My Head Stuck in A Barstool written by 4th grader Russel Kay (from the stage show)

"Teddy Bear Cottage" by Eli Land, age 4.

Fourth Grader Michael Breen's "Giant Bugs 2"

And finally, from Madeline Desrochets "I Love You The Best" (because that's what I do!)


(I think at this age I wrote stories about murderous robots and monkeys moving to the city- this kids are far more well adjusted than I)
This totally had to have been my most kid friendly post ever,btw; I'll try to slut it up later...

Sphere: Related Content

Monday Morning Cuteness

let's see how well today goes...

Here are two videos of dogs and cats living in harmony. Forgetting that they're different species and falling in love. I mean if they can do it, why can't we humans?


and this is from my friend Chelsea and her Lady & Peanut in love


my dog and cats kinda just ignore each other...not as cute but kinda keeps the peace

Sphere: Related Content