Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I Think I Just Threw Up in My Mouth


So He Who Will Not Be Named is coming down to Dodger Stadium, with his band of losers (ha! last place!) for a 3 game series. I should be more apathetic to this thing considering how everyone not wearing black and gold knows that its gonna be a b.s. moment branded in history with boos and asteriks but I just know that he's going to do it against the Dodgers, because it seems that he always gets milestones against us (and i had a feeling that if this day would ever come it would come against us- 71*, 500th steal, 500th homer, ugh). And the whole thing just offends my sense of decency . If I was a manager, and I've been saying this for at least 5 years, any time he came to bat I would have my ptichers throw at his head and I would gladly take the suspension and fines. I would be a hero for ever.
So I'm hoping that over the next three days whenever he's introduced that we don't boo him as we do, it only feeds his steroid enlarged head and ego, but rather just silence, I'm talking like crickets, or everyone at those moments can turn their back to the field and not acknowledge it. It's impossible to organize 5 peoplenot to mention 50,000 but how awesome would that be? I know people are going to go and cheer and be loud, its the fuckin' Giants who I've hated since before I was born (they cheated in '51), but those moments will say a lot. When they were playing the Cubs in Wrigley I remember Sportscenter showing fans who were boasting about how much they hate him and how much they were going to boo him, but it seemed that the only time there was an enthusiasm in the stadium was when he was at bat when it seemed the whole crowd was standing, which really pissed me off, especially because The Unnatural noticed. The Padre fans did it right last year with the syringe on the field (and that will be the last thing I ever say good about the Padres)
So fuck him, eat a Dodger dog whenever he's at bat and don't give him the honor of your jeers. He's not worth and the Giants, they're going to lose anyway.
I feel so bad for Vin Scully, but I know if it happens he'll handle it exactly like he needs to, the right way; he always has.
Here are a few things I would rather do then witness that moment:
Try to use a bathroom in J0-Ann's Fabrics.
Be a sheep in this guy's town.
Have her as my teacher (possible Harry Potter spoiler; I didn't actually read the article)
Watch Kelly Osbourne in Chicago, nightly
Be Britney Spears right now.

Whatever. Let's go Dodgers, and welcome to your blue heaven Scott Proctor

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