Slumdog Ketchupaire

So I read this story weeks ago and I wanted to comment on it but I didn't really have "an angle"...
Anyway here's the story (from the Daily Mail)

Speed is the word for Guinness Rishi as he powers his way through a giant 490 gram bottle of ketchup in just 39 seconds.

Guinness believes he holds the fastest time for drinking the world's favourite condiment, which he sups through a straw.

Guinness puts his motivation down to the need to stand out in a country of over 1 billion people.

'People consider me an extraordinary person, not an ordinary person,' he said.

His records include 'taking on the world's oldest adoptee', after he legally took custody of his 61-year-old brother-in-law.

Guiness also built the tallest sugar cube tower in the world, which stands at 64 inches.

He took his new name in 1991, after keeping a motor scooter in continuous motion for 1,001 hours for another bizarre record.

'Persons who have no money wish to do something in their lives, so the poor people try to break records by their strength or their will,' said Guinness, who is joint owner of an auto-parts factory.

The ketchup-crazed pensioner said he will continue to find new records to break until he achieves his dream of official recognition.

'I hope to make my family proud,' he said.

I had planned on talking about how kind of sad it is that in a country that size the only way he feels he can stand out is to....well, do something like this and maybe about how the individualism and quest for exceptionalism that once defined the American spirit has taken root (or infected, depending on your point of view) the world and how at least this way is a lot better than what seems to always tragically happen when someone takes a gun and kills for recognition or infamy, like Arthur Bremer, Keith Jesperson or others (who don't deserve the extra google hits.)
First all I ended up thinking of was "ewww; that's really kind of gross." Secondly I was confused that you could legally adopt a 61 year old.
But then my thoughts went back to Slumdog Millionaire, which I saw last week while visiting a friend (who somehow already has it bootleg, which worked out well because it was snowing in New York) and how, admittedly in the immediate afterglow, I had perhaps hyperbolically declared that I wouldn't call it the best movie I've ever seen but that I'm not sure I've seen one better and about how this reminded me of it. I guess in the way that it was a story of "Persons who have no money wish to do something in their lives" and how they've both ended up getting their dreams; after all Rishi was featured in an international publication, which isn't too shabby for a guy who pretty much just drinks ketchup fast.

It's a pretty universal story, though if he were black he'd totally have to be drinking hot sauce...I' wonder how hot sauce would taste on ice cream...i'm a teensy bit obsessed.

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Iron Maiden Can't Be Serious...

...can they? They "got it" and were just kind of goofing on the whole "satanic heavy metal band" right? Because I just saw their video for "The Number of The Beast" on VH1's beyond positive superlatives "2009 for 2009" marathon (they're on the "The"s and it seriously made me LOL. I mean, watch it for yourself- it's probably my new favorite video

After seeing that I actually thought for a second that their whole career had been an elaborate performance art piece where they were "Spinal Tap" before "Spinal Tap." Seriously what was up with that dancing couple just waltzing on stage? or the whole 5.99 costumed red devil? That weird sea creature-thing? Godzilla?!?! They must've been the most random band ever; what fun, what fun

God I love it! (and what a good song). I have a feeling they put on an absolutely amazing live show- where's my time machine when I need it?

[ADDENDUM: According to Wikipedia, and I quote,"When the music video was first shown on MTV, Eddie's appearance at the end was edited out after complaints from frightened viewers." Who were these viewers? I mean seriously? Were the 80s that "innocent" and "peaceful" a time that a cartoonishly grotesque stitled costumed guy would terrify you? Hopefully such people were done away with in the Great Idiot Purge of 1995, though I doubt it.

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Funky Cold Medina

So Vh1 Classic is doing a 2009 for 2009 video marathon where they're going to play 2009 straight videos (in alphabetical order! for those obsessives among us) and it is pretty clearly the greatest thing ever. It's like if someone created the wheel, except if that wheel was made of sliced bread; anyway it's awesome and you should all be watching it and it's just begging for a far braver and wittier soul to give it the Beavis & Butthead" or MST treatment. (like i mean for this video of Ray Parker Jr's "Ghostbusters"- that's ripe for mocking. Watch it... "Busting makes me feel good" I'm sure it does Ray, I'm sure it does)

But anyway I was watching it and on came Tone Loc's classic (and only hit?) Funky Cold Medina, and it put me in the mind of something I used to do in the before time of this site; encourage alcoholism with fun and different cocktail recipes-woo! And in case you don't know the song, here it is (and don't mind the blatant trans/homophobial the 80s weren't all together perfect)

and for you all, here is apparently all you need (minus whatever gives it that bubbly cauldron vibe- dry ice would probably work I guess)

Funky Cold Medina
1 oz vodka
1 oz Southern Comfort
1 oz peach liqueur
1 oz blue curacao liqueur
top with cranberry juice
top with ice

Pour over ice and top off with cranberry juice.
Serve in "Mason Jar"

I wonder what to add to make a Funky Warm Medina*...it's been snowing off and on for weeks, and that's just not ok.

*though after a few of those I think anyone is gonna be feeling quite warm and funky

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Hillary Should Do This More Often

Hillary unveils a great new campaign strategy at a Rhode Island rally-open mockery


I personally enjoy mockery and sarcasm- it goes a long way with me and since L'État c'est moi it goes a long way with everyone else. And since she is trailing and everyone is writing her off she should just keep mocking and like during debates just roll her eyes or maybe smuggle a halo on stage to hold above Barack's head like bunny ears.
At least it would be incredibly entertaining and people seem to want entertainment more than policy nowadays so have at it.

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The Brawling Rooneys Return

Thank god for the Brits…and their gossip.
From the Daily Mail comes more information about my favorite British "should be made into a sitcom" family

The Rooneys are a formidable lot. The men all look like Wayne, simply with varying belly sizes and crew cuts. Most seem to be amateur boxers.

The nicest thing the Mail heard about them this week, in Liverpool, was that they were "good, solid, Irish Catholics, the salt of the earth, and dead good with their fists". Eek!

The last time she extended common courtesy to her husband's relatives, inviting them to her 21st birthday party, Coleen was rewarded with one cousin baring her boobs to photographers.

The time before that - her 18th birthday - the £10,000 of "refreshments" behind the bar were a little too enthusiastically received, and the evening ended in a punch-up.

How high can the poor girl's standards be, given that she is marrying a man who once paid for sex with a granny, and - as worryingly, perhaps - thought it was perfectly normal to propose in a petrol station?

This week there has been much huffing about the very public snub, and endless family conflabs about whether the cousins should boycott the post-wedding party that Coleen has said she will be throwing for them as compensation.

Yet hilariously, Coleen's efforts to airbrush her soon-to-be in-laws from her new glossy life have served only to throw the spotlight on them. Our curiosity is whetted.

Never mind whether Posh will be maid of honour, or if Wayne will wear a floral waistcoat, when it comes to this wedding, it's the groom's family we really want to know about.

Who are all these Rooney "rellies", as they are so quaintly called in Croxteth, and can they really be so hideous that they must be banned from the pages of a publication that routinely makes goddesses out of Jade Goody and Kerry Katona?

Perhaps the old Coleen McLoughlin would have snorted loudly and slapped an ample thigh when she heard that one of her intended's cousins - a gay transvestite, no less - was offering his services as a bridesmaid.

It certainly seems that Stephen, the son of Wayne's uncle John, thought that the Coleen he knew and loved would appreciate his quirky sense of humour.

As he pointed out, while confirming that he likes to dress up in a Danny La Rue-type wig and slap on red lipstick: "I'm good mates with Coleen and she knows what I'm like.

"I came out about two years ago and both she and Wayne are cool about it."

For some reason he felt compelled to tell the world: "I've worn knickers and bras when I've been with boyfriends."

Then added: "If Coleen wants me as a bridesmaid then she won't be let down. I've been hitting the shops."

Heavens! Stephen is 23, often paints his nails scarlet, likes to show off his tongue stud and works in Kentucky Fried Chicken, though presumably not all at the same time.

Still, Stephen seems positively harmless when you compare him to his younger sister Natalie.

It was Natalie, 18, who famously fell out of her dress in front of the massed ranks of celebrity snappers at Coleen's "tasteful" 21st birthday party.

Following the pattern of holding every family do in a more upmarket venue than the last, Coleen - ever anxious to buff up her image - had pulled out all the stops for her 21st.

Indeed, friends have said that she saw the party as a precursor for her wedding - a chance to banish the awful memories of previous chavtastic events and practise how to throw a proper regal party, as befitting the King and Queen of Hello!

But she hadn't reckoned on the lovely Natalie being determined to grasp her ten minutes in the limelight with that dramatic self-exposure.

And it didn't end there. Pursued by the red-tops, and actively encouraged to think of herself as some sort of fledgling celeb, Natalie gushed to the Press about her famous cousin, his fiancé, their family - but mostly about her own breasts.

Just weeks later, she underwent a boob job, upping herself from a 34C to a much more mediafriendly 34FF.

And she couldn't resist telling how even Wayne had given his seal of approval.

She said: "My mum has told Wayne about it and he just laughed. I can't wait to get it done and I'll be getting them out all over the place."

She went on to threaten to flash even more if she got an invite to their wedding, joking: "If Coleen doesn't like my new boobs, I'll squeeze her head between them.

"My aim is to look like Jordan. I've met her and she looks fantastic."

Oh dear. These blatant shrieks for attention were terribly embarrassing for all concerned.

But Coleen was furious. She had already warned Wayne that he had to keep his wayward family under control at public events.

There had been much gnashing of teeth in the McLoughlin home after the first(very) public hint that all was not well between the families.

Coleen's 18th had ended in either a "little upset" or a mass brawl between the Rooneys and the McLoughlins, depending on whose version of events you believe.

One report said there was then a stand-up row between the young couple's mothers over who was to blame when things got out of hand.

"You've ruined my daughter's night," Coleen's mum is said to have screamed.

"Your ******* family started this," retorted Mrs Rooney.

Whatever, the police were called, and the PR advisers who were already starting to work with Coleen realised that they might have a struggle on their hands. And since then, they have.

Take the tale of Uncle Eugene, who found himself branded a "neighbour from hell" by the family next door, and plastered over the papers.

Back in 2005, Liverpool mum Julie Worsley, 36, told of her "nightmare" at the hands of Eugene, a keen boxer and keep-fit addict.

Julie was convinced he wanted to drive her from her home, "to buy our house and turn it into a gym for him and his mates".

His supposed method of driving her and her four children out?

Playing loud music, shouting abuse, and displaying some of those infamous Rooney fist flurries.

"He and his mates are always shouting abuse through the walls into our living room.

"I went round once to complain and they all started telling me I should leave my husband and go in there with them for some 'fun'.

"Wayne Rooney has been round there himself singing karaoke from 1am to 11.30 the next morning."

Then there is John Morrey - Wayne's favourite uncle, and the brother of his mother, Jeanette - who was fined £4,000 for illegally showing Sky Sports matches at his pub.

In normal circumstances, such an indiscretion would hardly have warranted coverage, but when he appeared before Liverpool Magistrates Court last year, the Press were on the case, so potent is the Rooney connection.

But it is not just the extended family that have been found wanting in the public decorum stakes.

Last year, Wayne's brother Graham came in for some serious stick in the red-tops when he was caught on camera singing distasteful songs about the serial killer Harold Shipman.

Graham presumably didn't engage his brain before allowing himself to be filmed singing with a guitar in his Liverpool bedroom, while a friend egged him on.

The ditty, to the tune of Winter Wonderland, went something like: "One Harold Shipman/There's only one Harold Shipman/Scousers say thanks, cos he only kills Mancs/ Walking in a Shipman Wonderland."

The Rooneys, however, were "grittier" types.

Wayne senior was a keen boxer and his brother, Graham, had the potential to be an amateur international had he not given it up for football.

Their uncle, Richie Rooney, runs the Croxteth Amateur Boxing Club.

"They are a very tough family," says a long-standing family friend.

"You can say what you like about them, but they don't have any pretensions. With them, what you see is what you get.

"They don't take kindly to being crossed and don't go in for all the glitzy, showbiz world.

"They still see Wayne as being one of them, but Coleen is wrapped up in a glamorous world they are not a part of."

The couple grew up in Croxteth, a rundown working class suburb just east of Liverpool city centre.

Rooney and his family were regulars at the tough Western Approaches pub, which has framed memorabilia signed by him on the walls.

It's all a million miles away from Hello! magazine, and that is where the trouble lies.

Because it's definitely in this glossy world that the couple's future lies.

Wayne may have the multi-millionpound feet, but Coleen is the one with aspirations, and the drive to make it happen.

She has already amassed a £5million fortune of her own, through canny self-promotions in everything from clothing to perfume to publishing. And brand Coleen sells.

The trouble is that the more it has to sell, the more upmarket it has to appear, and there is simply no room for the sort of tackiness that characterised Coleen's early days in showbiz.

When was the last time she was photographed in one of those hideous tracksuit/Ugg boot combos?

Her image today is sweet, cool and decidedly collected. Yet, is she trying to move just that little bit too far away from her roots?

There is something a little poignant about one of Coleen's latest interviews, in which she confirms that she finds it easier these days to make new friends from within the celebrity world.

"There's nothing wrong with having celebrity friends," she gushed.

"Trust is a big thing when you're meeting new friends. You don't know whether they're just being friends with you because of who you are.

"I think that's why you see a lot of relationships between celebrities - because they can trust each other."

It's true that other celebs are unlikely to embarrass you by whipping out their boobs at your cameraladen party, but attempting to completely wipe Wayne's relatives from the picture might be taking things a little too far.

What Coleen might not have grasped is that once that ring goes on her finger, they are her "rellies", too.

And no amount of airbrushing is going to change that.

If they didn't exist someone would have had to invent them. God I LOVE THE ROONEYS

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The "Lights" Are Flickering

The Lights MAY be kept on!
From Variety

"Friday Night Lights" may shine on for another season -- and on more than one network.

NBC Universal execs have decided they want to go the extra yard to ensure the drama returns for a third season. To make sure that happens, conglom is having serious conversations with several networks about a plan to carve out multiple broadcast windows for the show, which has received critical worship and has a cult-like following.

Peacock has had talks with the CW, Comcast Entertainment Networks (E!/G4) and TNT about sharing "Friday Night Lights" with NBC. DirecTV, which last year picked up the rights to NBC sudser "Passions," has also been brought into the mix.

Just how the shared window plan would work is unclear, but one model may be the plan NBC worked out for "Law & Order: Criminal Intent."

Starting this season, episodes of "CI" premiered on USA Network and aired a few months later on NBC. Skein has generated solid numbers in both windows.

Whether NBC U can work out a similar deal with a network it doesn't own remains to be seen. Already, some people familiar with the talks have complained that Peacock's asking price for "Friday Night Lights" is too high.

Still, the show's loyal core audience and attractive demos -- it's among the most popular shows on TV with upscale viewers -- could help close the sale.

Reps for the Peacock and producer Imagine Television declined comment.

Please Please Please! I’d even watch the CW for it (p.s. what does CW stand for anyway?)
But any celebration may be premature

Variety reports that Taylor Kitsch, who plays hard-boozing, lady-killing fullback Riggins, has signed on to star in the next installment of the X-Men franchise—and that he did so with with blessing of NBC brass. Great news for Kitsch, of course, except that the movie's May 1 release date means his 2008 schedule is kind of booked. Which means NBC knows FNL isn't coming back this year, or else they'd never have given Kitsch permission to go play Gambit in the first place.

I mean he could still do both, now that writers are back they can write in a reason for him to be gone half the season so I’m not totally defeated yet. But in another way Taylor Kitsch as Gambit? That’s hot! And by that I mean Taylor- Riggins is a sex god
(unfortunately will.i.am. would be in the movie too which dooms it to being unwatchable or enjoyable)
But screw will



Save Friday Night Lights! Don't let it become one of these TV tragedies.

Clear Eyes, Full Heart, Can’t Lose

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Adapting

adapting- that's a strange looking word.

Anyway heres the trailer for Son of Rambow, a story about two British (maybe Irish) kids attempt to remake Rambo and it looks cute to all get out (which I think is an expression and not just something I mangled)

Adorable, right?
Well when I saw that on BWE, seeing that trailer about children trying to remake a movie I was immediately reminded of an amazing true story about 3 12 year old friends in Mississippi who decided to make a shot by shot remake of Raiders of the Lost Ark and over the course of their teenage years they pulled it off! It’s amazing (and so amazing that I think someone is making a movie about these kids trying to make a movie about another movie- so meta)
Raiders of the Lost Backyard
Here’s the articles opening just to whet your apetitite because if you don’t know about it it is such an amazing story about so much, growing up, growing apart, the things that hold us together, youthful dreams and devotions, friendship... and some other jazz

Chris Strompolos was a rowdy, pudgy kid who craved attention. He once bit a classmate, and he had a habit of barking at his teachers, which didn’t go over very well at the Episcopal schools he attended in southern Mississippi. In their efforts to get him to behave, teachers made Chris sit on his hands, copy pages from the Bible, and stay in a dark room for hours by himself. On one occasion, Chris recalls, he even got paddled in front of his classmates. More and more, he drifted into a fantasy world—the world of his favorite movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark. Ever since seeing it in the summer of 1981, he had idolized the film’s hero, the swashbuckling archaeologist Indiana Jones. Chris loved Indiana Jones. He wanted to be Indiana Jones. Cracking the bullwhip. Rescuing the girl. Making wisecracks all the while. Whenever he could, Chris slipped into the swampy woods near his hometown of Gulfport, and he swung from vines and pretended to be Indy in a world of adventure far from the awful reality (whap) he had to endure (whap) as that wooden paddle smacked his behind (whap).

When he wasn’t playing Indiana Jones, Chris often pored over his Raiders of the Lost Ark comic book. It was a good way to pass the time during the hour-long school-bus rides. One day on the bus, the 10-year-old Chris showed his prized comic book to a skinny older boy, a sixth-grader named Eric Zala, who was known in school as a comic-book collector and talented graphic artist. Eric, 11, seemed impressed. It turned out he was a Raiders fan, too.

During a school assembly that spring, Chris noticed Eric again: he was up on the screen, playing a Gestapo-type villain in a super-8 movie made by a group of sixth-graders under a teacher’s supervision. Chris loved every minute of it—and it wasn’t lost on him that Eric had modeled his character after Toht, the sadistic Nazi from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

After the school year was over, in June of 1982, Chris called Eric. He had an idea. Eric was surprised to be hearing from a kid he barely knew, but invited Chris over to his house anyway.

What ensued was halfway between a playdate and a Hollywood pitch meeting. The two boys sat in Eric’s damp basement, listening to a sound-effects record and brainstorming about doing their own shot-for-shot remake of the movie they loved. Chris planned to play Indiana Jones. Eric said he would take the Toht role.

For most kids, an afternoon spent daydreaming out loud about taking on some grand project would have been enough. But for Chris and Eric, it was just the beginning. As partners, they would prove to be strangely suited to the huge task they had begun. And so their little undertaking became something that occupied them for the rest of the 1980s.

While countless American kids spent the Reagan years numbing their brains with the new adolescent crazes of cable-TV channel surfing and cramming for the S.A.T.’s, Eric and Chris were routinely pulling all-nighters to run lines of dialogue, hammer sets, and make stuff explode. Other boys asked for toys; they asked for props and supplies—a bullwhip, a leather jacket, six cans of spray paint, a VHS camcorder (which Chris got for his birthday one year). Eventually, their project would grow into something big enough to devour their teenage years, but their goal still seemed out of reach even when they had deep voices and girlfriends, with both of them burned out and practically hating each other’s guts. And even 21 years past their start date, when Chris and Eric were finally and absolutely through with each other, their insane project would bring them together once again.

Here’s a trailer for a showing of the finished product


And I can’t recommend reading the rest of this Vanity Fair article enough .

Speaking of different and unexpected adaptations here's a screen shot of the computer matrix i have no idea from the new Smurfs Movie

I wonder what Smurfette looks like- she was my favorite
(p.s. Vanity Smurf-gay? I'm saying yeah)

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And don't you know that it's just you, hey Jude, you'll do

OMG alert this is probably the cutest thing ever
If the Beatles were to be begin today this kid would definitely be "The Cute One." Watch as he outshines Paul at his own song and performs Hey Jude

I love how he tries to hit that high scream that Paul does and of course he's little "L"s as "R"s
I want this kid-he's so heavy

Then you'll begin to make it
Better better better better better better, oh.

Na Na Na Na Na Na, Na Na Na

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Crank Dat Dwight

(I’m not sure what “crankin” is but it probably fits)
Remember when it was predicted that if Dwight Howard were to lob the basketball bounce it off the backboard with his left hand and dunk it with his right that he would win?
Well that dunk did get thrown down and the prediction was correct but as I’m sure you know if you care the dunk that won it for him was when he donned a Superman costume and actually seemed to fly so high that he could throw down the dunk with intense force (though to be nitpicky is it actually a dunk if you don’t touch the rim)



I didn’t see the contest last night but I dvr’d it and to be honest I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun watching like a “skill contest” I mean I was actually laughing out loud at some of the stunts, like the whole birthday cake thing, which was just so unique and enjoying it so much that the guy I was with got a big kick out of it just by enjoying my enjoyment (and the fact I usually don’t laugh that much without the aid of some substance)
Here’s the contest in case you didn’t see it
Part 1

Round 2 (the Superman Dunk is at about 7:23)

and the Finals


A few thoughts:

• when Gerald Green dunked in his socks I know that that;s physically hard to do but following the “lob the basketball bounce it off the backboard with his left hand and dunk it with his right dunk” which was just so big and in Kenny’s Top 5 dunks it was like why bother (and when Magic said something like “why did he do the same dunk?” and someone noticed that Daryl Dawkins had knocked Green’s shoes off the table in seeming contempt I was dying)
• The reason Gerald Green lost was because he had Rashad McCants help him and Rashad is just all around horrible
• Dr. J with his grey hair and beard looked so distinguished I kind of wished he could be our first black president
• Does Magic eat other HIV + people? Is that what keeps him healthy? because not only does he look incredibly healthy but he’s just so huge my mom calls him fat
  
• the fan voting was a good idea but next time they need to learn how to fill those five minutes better- maybe have somebody perform or something but after Dwight’s dunks and in the interval until he was officially the winner there was like a commercial and a noticeable draining of energy and excitement. Just something to work on.
• that may have been the dunk contest to end all dunk contests but it definitely won't be the last, sorry Scoop
  
• And finally how in the world is anyone going to be able to top this for next year’s contest? I can't wait to see them try

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What can Brown do for you?

I think that may be my new nickname for Barack- sure it may sound a little racist, or whatevs but it's inspired by that UPS ad campaign and the fact that Barack can and will do anything and everything to help everyone. He's dreaaamy.
And you can see what Barack (or Brown) with this, which may be my new favorite website. I've always wanted a new bicycle Here- try it
here is a small selection of favorites (aka some I’ve seen- I don’t know how far this rabbit hole goes)

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Oh Uno

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you
You'd be like Heaven to touch.
I wanna hold you so much.

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you

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LOLBible- Famous Scriptures If Written By LOLCats

As if some divine feline, Celing Cat had imparted her infinite and absolute wisdom to her beloved cats to inscribe and share.
Oh wait, she did in what may be my new favorite thing and the absolute best thing ever
The LOLCat Bible Translation Project

In the Beginning (Genesis Chapter 1)
1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.

2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.

3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1

6 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling.7 An Ceiling Cat doed teh skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen.8 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.

9 An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet.10 An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good.

11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz.13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.

14 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day.15 It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly.16 An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day.17 An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs.18 An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good.19 An so teh furth day w00t.

20 An Ceiling Cat sayed, waterz bring me phishes, An burds, so kittehs can eat dem. But Ceiling Cat no eated dem.21 An Ceiling Cat maed big fishies An see monstrs, which wuz like big cows, except they no mood, An other stuffs dat mooves, An Ceiling Cat sawed iz good.22 An Ceiling Cat sed O hai, make bebehs kthx. An dont worry i wont watch u secksy, i not that kynd uf kitteh.23 An so teh...fith day. Ceiling Cat taek a wile 2 cawnt.

24 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has MOAR living stuff, mooes, An creepie tings, An otehr aminals. It happen so tehre.25 An Ceiling Cat doed moar living stuff, mooes, An creepies, An otehr animuls, An did not eated tehm.

26 An Ceiling Cat sayed, letz us do peeps like uz, becuz we ish teh qte, An let min p0wnz0r becuz tehy has can openers.

27 So Ceiling Cat createded teh peeps taht waz like him, can has can openers he maed tehm, min An womin wuz maeded, but he did not eated tehm.

28 An Ceiling Cat sed them O hai maek bebehs kthx, An p0wn teh waterz, no waterz An teh firmmint, An evry stufs.

29 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.

31 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthxbai.


The Ten Commandments

1 Then Ceiling Cat spoked all them werds:

2 I iz Ceiling Cat An I iz Top Cat, An I broughted u out of hawt lend wit no cheezbrgrs for hard werk at all

3 No can has other ceiling cat!! U gotz other Ceiling Cat, I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes.

4 If u try be Ceiling Cat of any of mai creayshunz up in floaty skai, down in erth or in watr or I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes.5 If u think faek Ceiling Cat iz Ceiling Cat, I mek u ded An ur children ded An ur children-children ded, for being stupid.6 If not I wuv u An all ur childrenz-childrenz-childrenz!

7 U sez Ceiling Cat bad, I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes, cuz I dun liek it. Srsly.

8 Remembur caturday An keep holy.9 U werk 6 dais An finish werk, K?10 Caturday, u no werk. U An all ur peepz go wrship me.11 I maded heavenz An erth An see An the stuff that does teh funney hoppey stuffz in An on it - so I make it holy cuz I no werk.

12 Bez u good to papa An mama so u has long lief.

13 U no maek peepz ded! Srsly!

14 U no maek sexxes wit other gurlz or menz than ur wief (so no awsum treesum alowed!).

15 U no taek stuffs for free if not getz for free.

16 U no tell bad stuff about ur neibor.

17 U no wantz neibor stuff! No wief, no gurlz, no menz, no animulz, NO BUKKITZ! DEY NOT UR BUKKITZ, K?


23rd Psalm
1 Ceiling Cat iz mai sheprd (which is funni if u knowz teh joek about herdin catz LOL.)
He givz me evrithin I need.

2 He letz me sleeps in teh sunni spot
an haz liek nice waterz r ovar thar.

3 He makez mai soul happi
an maeks sure I go teh riet wai for him. Liek thru teh cat flap insted of out teh opin windo LOL.

4 I iz in teh valli of dogz, fearin no pooch,
bcz Ceiling Cat iz besied me rubbin' mah ears, an it maek me so kumfy.

5 He letz me sit at teh taebl evn when peepl who duzint liek me iz watchn.
He givz me a flea baff an so much gooshy fud it runz out of mai bowl LOL.

6 Niec things an luck wil chase me evrydai
an I wil liv in teh Ceiling Cats houz forevr

Ecclesiastes 3 (the inspiration for The Byrds’ Turn! Turn! Turn! )
1 sup. there has is a sison 4 everthing, and a tiems 4every purpos under teh ceiling, lol.

2 a tiemz 2 get kittehs, an a tiems 2 get ded.

3 tiemz 2 mades cookies, an also tiems 2 cheezburgers.

4 teimz 2 hugs, and loltims 4 buttsecks. u gets teh pichur.

9 what gud is it the kitteh from all that trbl?10 i has sees what all teh mans did ther, from teh ceiling cat11 teh ceiling cat mades teh bestes cookies and cheezbuergrs. but he aslo mades us wantz the invisibl sandwhiches he keep up in teh ceiling, omg, nfw.12 i knows teh invisibil cheezcakes has are not filling, but better is to do gud, liek mading cookies, upgradin ram, ect., k, srsly.13 an also of cours teh surprize buttsecks wenever possibl, lol. ceiling cat sez so.14 teh buket of cookies meads by the ceiling catz, is ful 4ever. no wai. wai!

15 now iz alredez haz been eaten. ceiling catz wants moar but iz hungree lol.

16 in teh sun iz judgd teh cookeez, an teh wikid buttsecks, an thai dont compair to teh rightisnez of teh cheezbuergrs.

17 ceiling cat iz teh judge, jury, xecushioner 4 a purpiz. itz hiz job.

18 ceiling cat gits in the est8z of men's kidz an showz them hoos bestes, so they see they has buttsecks 2.19 4 kiddiez an bestes rofl; one dies, and then another; thez cant breeth from the lolz; men an bestes make a big buttsecks sandwhich to the ceiling. Thai likez it.20 evereeone cumz from teh littursbox an goez back when they takes a break.21 men and bestes upgradez and downgradez as ceiling cat watchus.

22 i knows what it looks liek, an we should be happy, 4 their iz plenty to share: who wants sum? wink wink. tis teh sison.

The Birth of Christ
18 Now, teh burth of teh Christ was liek dis: After Marry and Joseph waz all "We's gonna get marrieded, kthnx", but before dey could had hankiez pankiez Mary was all pr3ggerz from Teh Ceiling Cat.19 Joseph was liek "I has virjn - NOOOO dey be stealin my virjn! Must hied hur".20 But when he was tihnkin, zomg, a WallCat frm Ceiling Cat was liek, "Oh hai! I'm in ur dreemz, givin u messij. Don't be scairdy cat. Taek Mary as ur wife - is virjn. But teh Forse is strong in tihs wun, lol! HovrCat is on hur, givn hur feetus, srsly." So joseph was liek " Oh yey I'm gonna love him and squeez him and call him george."21 But Wallcat was liek "No, you gonna call him Jebus, cso George bad name, srsly. cuz he save kittehs frum bein bad kittehs. Kthxbai."22 So all dis was all did cuz Ceiling Cat had sed it wud be. His proffit was all liek:23 "Hay guise, look! teh virjn iz all pr3ggers, and dey gonna call him A-manual", dat be joospeek for "Ceiling Cat wit us"24 Then Joseph waked up, done wat teh anjel frm Ceiling Cat tolded him to, and was all liek "U wit me now lol" at Mary.25 And dey didnt has teh HARBL GOES WHERE!?!? til affer dey gets a son and calleded him Jebus. Kthnx.

The Beatitudes (or Teh Catitudes)
Wen he seez lotz kittehz, he climbz tree. His BFz climbz tree too.

2 He sez hai and he teaches teh kittehs, he sez:

3 U r doin good if U iz liek a n00b on teh inside; U can has teh Ceiling.

4 U r doin good if U iz sad kitteh; U can has petting.

5 U r doin good if U no want 2 pwn otehr kittehz; U can has urths when otehr kittehz is daid.

6 U r doin good if U iz liek "I can has justices, plz?"; U can has it.

7 U r doin good if U no pwn teh n00bz; Ceiling Cat will not pwn U.

8 U r doin good if U is cleen on teh inside; Ceiling Cat not invisble 4 U.

9 U r doin good if U iz makin teh peece; Ceiling Cat is liek "U mi kittehz."

10 U r doin good if U iz pwned by otehr kittehz just coz U iz fair n reeznable; U can has Ceiling (and share it wif n00b on teh inside kittehz).

11 U r doin good if U iz pwned by otehr kittehz coz of me and thei make up stupid lies abt U, k?

12 B happy and make teh celebrazns coz u can has cookiez n cakez in Ceiling, cos itz liek wen kittehz pwned Ceiling Catz kittehz.

The Crucifixion (from Luke)

26 Whiel dey wuz draggin him awai dey seed Simon from Cyrene an maed him carri teh cross.27 Lotz of peepl wuz dere, includin sum ladiez who wuz cryin.28 Jesus wuz liek "U shudnt crai for me. U shud crai for urselvz an ur childrin.29 Bcz teh tiem wil com when u wil wish u nevr hadded eni childrin at all.30 Den
" 'u will be liek Mountinz, fall on us!"
an hillz, covr us!" '
31 If peepl do dis when there is cheezeburger, what thei do when thei can no has cheezeburger?"

32 Two othr d00dz wuz dere to be eksekutid. Dey wuz criminalz k.33 Dey caem to dis plaec called teh Skull (rock!) an crucified Jesus betwin teh criminalz.34 Jesus sed, "Ceiling Cat, forgiv dem, dey duzint know what dey iz doin." An teh guardz playd diec to desied who got Jesus's yarnz.

35 Evribodi maed fun of Jesus. Dey wuz liek "If he is Ceiling Cat's son he shud saev hizself."

36 Teh soljrz wuz liek "LOL" an gaev him vinigar to drink.37 Dey wuz liek "If u iz teh king of teh Jews, saev urself."

38 An dey putted a sien on him dat sed KING OF TEH J00Z LOL.

39 Wun of teh criminalz wuz bein all rude.

40 But teh othr wun wuz liek "Izint u afraid of Ceiling Cat? U gotted teh deth penalti too, remembr.41 We dizrv it, but Jesus didint do ennithin rong."

42 Den he wuz liem, "Jesus, remembr me when u getz bak to ur kingdm."

43 Jesus wuz liek "Todai u wil be wif me in hevn."

44 It wuz around six an it gotted dark for three hourz,45 bcz teh sun stoppted shinin. An teh curten in teh templ wuz torn in half. Dat wuz a mirakl, no wun wuz sharpnin dere clawz on it or nothin, srsly.46 Jesus wuz all "Ceiling Cat, I sendz mai spirit to u." An den he died :(

47 Roman kitteh see whut happin, say 2 Ceiling Cat "Jesus good kitteh, not should die D:"48 Teh ppl that saw gotted sad. Dey rode away wif invisible bike.49 Peeple taht knew Jesus (teh wummenz too, lol) from Galilee, dey staid 'n' wached.

50 Honurable man is honorrble, he name Joseph.51 When Cross happn he say "Do not want." Josph from Arimthtehea, he wantid Ceiling Cat 2 come.52 He say to Pilate, "I taik Jesus' body, kk?"53 He take down & wrap it in soft yarn and placed it in cave, whut was emptyt.54 Yay, verily, it was Caturday.

55 Teh wummenz what came wif Jesus from Galilee followeded Joseph saw tomb & yarn & body of Jesus.56 Dey go home and make nice Cheezburger. But dey rested on teh Sabbath 'cuz Ceiling Cat liek dat.


The Resurrection (Mark Version)
1 K so tehn on Mondy Mary Magdaln an Mary hoo wuz Jamses mom taekd sum spisez to rub on teh Jesus husk soes it dont stank. 2 An dey getz to teh cavez rly erly in teh mornan, liek sunries. 3 An dey wuz wundrin hoo wuz gunna maekded teh srsly big rokk door opind. 4 An dey lookded an seen teh door alredy opind. 5 And wen dey goed in teh caev dey seen a d00d thar in wite robes, an dey got skeert. 6 Teh d00d sez 'O HAI THAR, don be skeert. U comed heer lookin fer teh Jesus u lef heer, rite? He camed bak frum teh deds an aint heer no moar. 7 Now GTFO an txt Hiz d00dz an Pete an tell em dat dey can haz meetz wit teh Jesus in Galalee liek He sed befoer He wuz ded. kthxbi' 8 An teh chikz GTFO rly kwik cuz dey was srsly skeert, an dey dint tawk teh hole way homed. 9 An teh frst persn teh Jesus shode up fer wuz Mary Magdaln. He wonse pwnd sevn demans taht wuz livin in her hoo-haa. 10 An she teld Hiz d00dz abowt her meetz an dey maed a cry. :*( 11 Wen dey thunkd abowt teh Jesus seein Mary an not dem, dey stard thunkin 'No wai. He stil dedz' 12 Den teh Jesus apeerd to 2 moar uv His d00dz wile dey out taekn a walk. 13 Dey told teh udder d00dz bowt it but dey sez 'No wai.'
14 So den Jesus shode up to all his d00dz wile dey was NOM NOM teh cheezbergrs an yelt an pwnd dem fer not baleevin He wuznt ded no moar. 15 An He sez, 'GTFO an GBTW tellin all teh cats an kittehs on Urfs abowt meh. 16 Tell dem teh cats dat baleev r full of WIN, an teh wons dat dont r on teh FAILBOAT an gonna get pwnd in teh hell. 17 An teh peepz full of WIN getz mah lvl ups an gonna b abl to pwn demans an 5P3@I< l33t w0RdZ, 18 an jugl snayks, an drank poysin witowt gittin hert, an respawnd ppl. k, bai.' 19 An wen he wuz doen talkin wit dem he taekd a INVISIBLE EVEVATER to teh skai an sat at da rite paw of Ceiling Cat. 20 An dey went an telded all teh catz and kittehz wat happn, and Ceiling Cat halpded dem do amazn shit to proev it. Kthxbai.

Finally a translation of the Bible I can get behind...yeah I think my god may be Ceiling Cat
Kthxbai

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Shangri-La and Xanadu

Two perfect seeming places I want to visit

Abu Dhabi has started to build what it says is the world's first zero-carbon, zero-waste car-free city.

Masdar City will cost $22bn (£11.3bn), take eight years to build and be home to 50,000 people and 1,500 businesses.

The city will be mostly powered by solar energy and residents will move in travel pods running on magnetic tracks.

The city will make use of traditional Gulf architecture to create low-energy buildings, with natural air conditioning from wind towers.

Water will be provided through a solar-powered desalination plant, Masdar says. The city will need a quarter of the power required for a similar sized community, while its water needs will be 60% lower.

The city forms part of an ambitious plan to develop clean energy technologies.

In January, the government of Abu Dhabi announced a $15bn five-year initiative to develop clean energy technologies, calling it "the most ambitious sustainability project ever launched by a government".

As part of the plan, Abu Dhabi will become home to the world's largest hydrogen power plant.

The money is being channelled through the Masdar Initiative, a company established to develop and commercialise clean energy technologies, and Abu Dhabi hopes it will lead to international joint ventures involving much more money.

Abu Dhabi will invest $4bn of equity in the project and borrow some of the rest, Masdar said.

"We are creating an array of financial vehicles to finance the $22bn development," Masdar chief executive officer Sultan al-Jaber told Reuters news agency.

"We will monetise all carbon emission reductions... Such innovative financing has never been applied to the scale of an entire city."

Of course all of the money used to pay for this oasis in the desert will have come from oil revenues, but let's not worry about that part.

In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure-dome decree:
Where Alph, the sacred river, ran
Through caverns measureless to man
Down to a sunless sea.
So twice five miles of fertile ground
With walls and towers were girdled round:
And there were gardens bright with sinuous rills,
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree;
And here were forests ancient as the hills,
Enfolding sunny spots of greenery.
-Coleridge

and in a less scary part of the world with a lot of fun things converging
Feeling singer Dan Gillespie revealed to us that singer Sophie Ellis Bexter is to start up a gay themed 80s club in London, inspired by David Bowie.
Gillespie, spilt the beans on the plans of the wife of his bassist, Richard Jones saying 28-year-old is in talks with the owners of the late Rebel Rebel gay night club.

80s? Sophie? Bowie? Buggers? Brits? I am totally there.
And I am really all about this club just as long as they promise to play this song.
For at least one straight hour. Each and Every night.

It's murder on the dancefloor
But you better not kill the groove
Dj, gonna burn this goddamn house right down
Oh, I know I know I know I know I know I know
About your kind
And so and so and so and so and so
I'll have to play
If you think you're getting away
I will prove you wrong
I'll take you all the way
Boy, just come along
Hear me when I say
Hey, It's murder on the dancefloor
But you better not kill the groove
Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey It's murder on the dancefloor
But you better not steal the moves
Dj, gonna burn this goddamn house right down
Oh I know I know I know I know I know I know
There maybe others
And so and so and so and so and so and so
You'll just have to pray
If you think you're getting away
I will prove you wrong
I'll take you all the way
Stay another song
I'll blow you all away
Hey, It's murder on the dancefloor
But you better not kill the groove
Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey Murder on the dancefloor
But you better not steal the moves
DJ, gonna turn this house around somehow
Murder on the dancefloor
But you better not kill the groove
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Murder on the dancefloor
But you better not steal the moves
Dj, gonna burn this goddamn house right down

(I LOVE THIS SONG)
Sophie Ellis-Bexter Murder on The Dance Floor [download]
Dj, gonna burn this goddamn house right down

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I Love This Dog

Uno! The Best Dog in the World! here he is on the Early Show

OMG it is the most perfect dog I've ever seen too. He's sooo cute I can barely stand it

Some other thoughts on last night at Westminster:

• I've decided I really want a long haired chihuaha- Paloma was so pretty last night
• The Pekingese may be the ugliest dog ever
• I didn't realize Great Danes are that chill that they could live in an apartment- that was surprising. Eva from last night was gorgeous.
• The Samoyed was just stunning and so pure and white
• The Tibetan mastiff from the working group had the most heart string adorable face ever
• The Neapolitian Mastiff, which apparently was the same breed as Fang from Harry Potter, was the scariest dog ever but I liked its gait
• The woman who judged the working dogs was so old as she went around calling them out and picking their order it was so slow but added so much drama
• My dog could never do any of the dog show stuff- he'd go around peeing on everything and barking. He does both a lot

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‘Cause This is Thriller Night

I wrote about this long long ago as my stuck in my head song of the day but apparently 25 years ago today was the day this album was released (sorry I misthought- today is the day the Thriller anniversary remix album is released) so this may be more appropriate
Here's a tonne of Michael Jackson info
From an LA Times retrospective

"Thriller": If ever a video killed the radio star, "Thriller" was it. The song was adequately groovy -- funked-out beat, lyrics seemingly lifted from some little kid's "scary storybook" -- but the video was legendary: bearing a price tag of $800,000, the 14-minute mini-film was the most expensive video of its time. Back then it was over the top; to today's viewer, jaded by bloated-budget videos, it still looks epic -- and deliciously campier than ever. That dialogue ("I'm not like other guys")! That Vincent Price rap interlude! And, most of all, those choreographed zombies, dancing in a style that -- thanks to Usher, Ne-Yo and Chris Brown -- still gets its close-up on MTV. (Baz Dreisinger)

It's close to midnight
something evil's lurkin' from the dark
Under the moonlight
You see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream
But terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze
As horror looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed

'Cause this is thriller
Thriller night
And no one's gonna save you
From the beast about to strike
You know it's thriller
Thriller night
You're fighting for your life
Inside a killer
Thriller tonight, yeah

You hear the door slam
And realize there's nowhere left to run
You feel the cold hand
And wonder if you'll ever see the sun
You close your eyes
And hope that this is just imagination
Girl, but all the while
You hear a creature creepin' up behind
You're outta time

'Cause this is thriller
Thriller night
There ain't no second chance
Against the thing with the forty eyes, girl
(Thriller)
(Thriller night)
You're fighting for your life
Inside a killer
Thriller tonight

Night creatures call
And the dead start to walk in their masquerade
There's no escaping the jaws of the alien this time
(They're open wide)
This is the end of your life

They're out to get you
There's demons closing in on every side
They will possess you
Unless you change that number on your dial
Now is the time
For you and I to cuddle close together, yeah
All through the night
I'll save you from the terror on the screen
I'll make you see

That this is thriller
Thriller night
'Cause I can thrill you more
Than any goule would ever dare try
(Thriller)
(Thriller night)
So let me hold you tight
And share a
(killer, diller, chiller)
(Thriller here tonight)

'Cause this is thriller
Thriller night
Girl, I can thrill you more
Than any goule would ever dare try
(Thriller)
(Thriller night)
So let me hold you tight
And share a
(killer, thriller)

I'm gonna thrill you tonight

[Rap]
Darkness falls across the land
The midnight hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize y'all's neighborhood
And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul for getting down
Must stand and face the hounds of hell
And rot inside a corpse's shell

I'm gonna thrill you tonight
(Thriller, thriller)
I'm gonna thrill you tonight
(Thriller night, thriller))
I'm gonna thrill you tonight
Ooh, babe, I'm gonna thrill you tonight
Thriller night, babe

[Rap]
The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of forty thousand years
And grizzly ghouls from every tomb
Are closing in to seal your doom
And though you fight to stay alive
Your body starts to shiver
for no mere mortal can resist
the evil of the thriller

And here's that most famous of videos

Michael Jackson - Thriller
Uploaded by hakim93200

Michael Jackson-Thriller [download]

and because I can’t do this without mentioning not only one of the best songs on this album and probably ever but also one of my personal favorites
on "Billie Jean":

Twenty-five years later, "Thriller's" central chamber has lost none of its fevered mystery. This is where the album's material plane gives way to a haunted interior, excavated by that remorseless bass line and shaped by a taut interplay of instruments -- the arrangement is ingenious, so lean and spare that it's hard to accept that there are three synthesizers at work. Jackson finds a new voice here, a victim's voice that shudders in the shadows of this remarkable sonic space, lashing at his own naiveté and at the false accusers who were just starting to gather at his door. (Richard Cromelin)

this is the official video which still confuses me a lot but this is the performance that my mom (constantly) tells me is the one that made Michael Jackson “Michael Jackson” and yeah it’s hot. From Motown 25


She was more like a beauty queen
From a movie scene
I said, don't mind
But what do you mean
I am the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round
She said I am the one who will dance
On the floor in the round

She told me her name was Billie Jean
As she caused a scene
Then every head turned with eyes
That dreamed of being the one
Who will dance on the floor in the round

People always told me
Be careful what you do
And don't go around
Breaking young girls' hearts
And mother always told me,
Be careful who you love
Be careful what you do
'Cause the lie becomes the truth

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that
I am the one
But the kid is not my son
She says I am the one
But the kid is not my son

For forty days and forty nights
The law was on her side
But who can stand
When she's in demand
Her schemes and plans
'Cause we danced on the floor in the round
So take my strong advice
Just remember to always think twice
(Do think twice)
Do think twice
Hooo

She told my baby
We’d danced ‘til three
Then she looked at me
Then showed a photo
My baby cried
His eyes were like mine (oh, no!)
Coz we dance on the floor, in the round, baby

People always told me
Be careful of what you do
And don't go around
Breaking young girls' hearts
(Don't break no hearts)

She came and stood right by me
Then the smell of sweet perfume
This happened much too soon
She called me to her room

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that
I am the one
But the kid is not my son
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that
I am the one
But the kid is not my son
No, no
She says I am the one
(Oh, babe)
But the kid is not my son

Hee, hee, hee!
Hoo!
Hoo!

She says I am the one
But the kid is not my son
No, no, no
Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that
I am the one

(You know what you did to me, babe)
But the kid is not my son
No, no, no, no
No, no

She says I am the one
But the kid is not my son

No, no

She says I am the one
You know what you did
She says he is my son
Breaking my heart, babe
She says I am the one

Billie Jean is not my lover
Billie Jean is not my lover

and here’s Chris Cornell’s version


Michael Jackson- Billie Jean [download]
Chris Cornell- Billie Jean [download]
I really really love that song.

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Uno!

Best in Show!!!

I so want this dog. It's probably like the cutest dog in the world

Uno is so much cuter minus the "J"

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Save Friday Night Lights

Tonight could be the last ever episode of one of the best shows of this decade. Don't regret not fighting to save it. Sign the Petition here join the Dillon Panthers Booster Club.


Even though, according to EW it may find a second chance on another channel, don't put too much hope into that- remember when Arrested Development was "supposed to" move to Showtime? And even if the strike ends by next week so this season could conclude Ben Silverman is a moron who has not been supporting it at all and may not let that happen

E! has "Three Easy Steps" that everyone can do

1. Watch the Friday Night Lights Finale Tomorrow Night at 9 p.m. on NBC: You don't have to know anything in advance. This is not Lost; there's no complicated mythology to learn. If you've ever been a person, known a person or wondered about becoming a person, you'll get Friday Night Lights.

2. Watch Other Episodes: They are available on nbc.com's Episode Rewind or in the season-one DVD (a ridiculous $18.99 on Amazon.com for 22 episodes), and every single click and purchase counts. You don't even have to watch in order. If you just want to watch one to test the water, I recommend the season-one eps "Full Hearts" (Matt & Julie's first date), "Black Eyes & Broken Hearts" (I dare you not to cry at the end!), "Blinders" (the powder puff game), "Mud Bowl" (it's what it sounds like)...Hell, just watch one, and then good luck not watching them all.

3. Spread the Word! Email this article to everyone you know who needs help in seeing the Lights! Let them know you are concerned for their own well-being and that you will help them do whatever it takes to get on board with this amazing show. Then wear your Panthers number 7 jersey with pride, try to keep your drool over Taylor Kitsch to a minimum, and remember...

"Clear Eyes. Full Hearts. Can't Cancel!"

You can watch all the episodes on Hulu
and here are the episodes that were recommended by E! online. Watch because to know this show is to love it
"Full Hearts"

"Blinders"

"Black Eyes & Broken Hearts"

"Mud Bowl"

and here's the Pilot, which is utterly amazing


Save Friday Night Lights!
'Clear Eyes, Full Heart, Can't Lose'

{UPDATE: Send Light Bulbs to NBC-"So grab a bulb, write “Lights On” on the side of it, and send it to NBC honcho Ben Silverman at: Ben Silverman
c/o NBC Studios
3000 W. Alameda Ave.
Burbank, CA. 91523
It worked for Jericho

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One Lucky Fan

It could happen to you
Deadspin has the incredible amazing true story of one lucky Giants fan who got had the “greatest day of his life” and… it's really cool. It's an amazing story

Hello everyone, I know many of you have heard about my story so far but for those of you that haven't......Take the time to read below (it's long but worth it) and look at the pictures and watch the videos. I had the best day of my life yesterday and it is one of the funniest stories you will ever hear.

So I got home from Arizona late Monday night after seeing the Giants win an amazing Super Bowl. I had an unbelievable weekend and I didn't think it could ever be topped....until yesterday.

Around 11:30 yesterday morning I decided to go and checkout the Giants ticker-tape parade. I figured I would just go for an hour or so and then head back home to get some work done. Little did I know it would turn into an 8 hour affair.

I received a pass to get onto the City Hall grounds, which got me relatively near the action. Once I realized that my designated section was actually pretty far away from the stage, I decided to move a little closer. I then snuck into the press section directly in front of the stage. I was sporting my Eli Manning Super Bowl jersey with a Giants hat and around my neck I had my lanyard and ticket stub from the Super Bowl. That is what saved me all day. The lanyard looked very "professional" so I was able to sneak into the press area.

Once the ceremony was over and the Giants started to move off of the stage, I creeped up to the stage. I then looked behind me and John Mara was there with his wife (the majority owner of the team). I then kind of blended in with his family as they were walking out and next thing I knew I got through the first security checkpoint. There were three more security checkpoints and with each one I got more and more nervous. I simply just walked aside Mr. Mara and his family (which was about 20 people deep) so it wasn't hard for me to blend in really. Next thing I know, they are guiding us to the other side of City Hall where there are four luxury buses waiting. I just kept walking along and next thing I know I had two of the four buses to choose from. I wanted to find the players bus but I didn't want to press my luck so I stayed with what worked. I just kept following Mr. Mara. I actually got on the bus directly in between him and his wife. I then sat down on the bus and just kept my head down. I didn't make eye contact with anyone or speak to anyone, I was so nervous. Sitting next to me was David Tyree's mother (he was two rows back with his son) and one row in front of me to my right was John Mara and his daughter (who happens to be gorgeous) [Ed. Note: I think he may mean Kate Mara]

As we are pulling away from City Hall, the streets are lined with Giants fans cheering for "us" and we had a police escort the entire way to Giants Stadium. That's where things got interesting. We got off the bus and were escorted directly into the Stadium tunnel. This is where I thought I was going to get caught. I had no idea what to do next. All of the players went in the locker room and all the Mara's said they were going up to the owner's box for the ceremony. I had to make a decision. I then saw David Tyree walking in with his little son and decided I would act like I was with them. I walked right behind him and got right into the locker room. So now the real fun starts. I'm hanging out as if I'm a player while all the guys in the locker room are just getting each other's autographs on the game balls and on their jerseys. This was my time to shine. I walked around and took some pictures of some of the lockers and then I got to Eli's. I asked Eli if he could sign my ticket stub from the Super Bowl, which he did. I then asked him to sign my Super Bowl jersey, which he did. I was then ecstatic and didn't know what to do. I even had people coming up to me asking me for my autograph. They must have thought I was Lawrence Tynes or something.

I stopped getting autographs at that point other than Brandon Jacobs signing my hat. By then all of the players were being called onto the field for the ceremony. So I figured...why not go with them. I walked right out into the tunnel with them and as they announced the players coming out, I just stood there shaking, thinking I was bound to get caught. I look to my left and Tom Coughlin is literally about 6 inches from me holding the Lombardi trophy (see great picture). Then I just went for it....I walked out there like I was on the team. I came out and there were probably 20-30,000 fans at the stadium all screaming and going crazy. I tried to take as much video as I could but I was so nervous/scared/excited at the same time. I watched the whole ceremony from literally right in front of the stage.

After the ceremony, I had to try to sneak back in to the locker room. I then saw a couple people of the Mara family (there were so many of them) that must not have gone up to the luxury box and once again I just acted like I was a family member. Next thing I know, I make it through two more security checkpoints and I'm right back in the locker room. This is where it was awesome. All the players were just dancing around and having a good time. Many of them were cleaning out their lockers and throwing things away. This is where I took all the pictures with the players. I could care less if I got caught at this point. I was just a lucky Giant fan that happened to sneak his way into the press section, then on to the owners bus, onto the field and into the locker room, all while going unnoticed. I then walked around the locker room and got every single player to sign my hat and I even got Gibril Wilson's game sweatshirt from him that he signed for me.

So I walked away with an Eli Manning signed Super Bowl ticket, an Eli signed Super Bowl jersey, a hat signed by the whole team, my City Hall access pass signed by Strahan and Gibril Wilson's signed game sweatshirt.

All more importantly I walked away with the great memories of the entire weekend and I was lucky enough to live them first hand. Thank god I have the pictures to prove it because I knew none of you would ever believe me.

I had an angel looking down on me yesterday making sure I had an unbelievable day and I know that angel was my (late) sister Jaime. I can just picture her now...........smiling from ear to ear and being so happy for me.

That’s really sweet and actually made me smile.
I guess the moral of this story is, if you want your dreams to come true, look like you belong and have no fear. Seriously, what's the worst that can happen?

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Keep the "Lights" On!

Best Week Ever has started an official petition to save one of the best shows on television "Friday Night Lights"
The text of the petition is below
And you should sign it:

In a primetime TV landscape dominated by reality shows and reheated cliche, every so often a television series of supreme quality and bold originality comes along and challenges our conception of the quality of entertainment we can expect from network television. Shows like Arrested Development, Firefly, and Freaks & Geeks, to name a few. And when these special miracles do come down from the TV heavens and find their way into the hearts of viewers hungry for programming that’s actually worthy of their precious time, the ratings-focused studio Lords who giveth always seem to taketh away.

NBC’s critically-acclaimed but woefully under-watched hour-long drama series Friday Night Lights is the next great series facing cancellation far before its time. If industry rumors are to be believed, tomorrow night’s final episode of FNL’s strike-shortened season could very well be its last, ever.

As fans of the show, and the kind of exciting television it represents, BestWeekEver.tv is willing to use our site as a platform to lend support to those who share our interest in keeping this vital series alive. The Dillon Panthers Booster Club be providing the Friday Night Lights fan community with regular updates on the status of the show’s fate, creating our own original content to help raise awareness about the great television so many people have been missing, and providing a place where the fans of the Dillon Panthers will have their message to NBC heard more loudly and clearly: “Keep The Lights ON!”

If you love Friday Night Lights, or haven't yet seen the show but support all TV of greater depth and quality, please sign this open petition to NBC asking that they renew Friday Night Lights for another season.

You can sign the petition here. Sign it and share it.
Do it for all that is good in the world.

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Notes on a Victory

89-78
and maybe the sky isn't Carolina Blue after all

An e-mail I wrote just as the game was ending:

y'know how everyone says about Duke-UNC that they hate but respect the other side? well i always thought that was bs. but then i realized as i was in my apartment living and dying with every call and unable to sit down for the last ten minutes that i there were probably carolina fans doing the exact same thing and we were both living and dying in the same moments and we had some connection and I could respect that. I still hate them but I can respect that passion. It must be like what opposing sides in war feel- hate but mutual respect earned on a razor's edge.

Because it was so true-I am not able to watch a Duke game of any importance with my friends out here and so last night I didn’t even try. I just locked myself in my apartment, turned off the lights, so I could rock back and forth, curse and yell at the tv, scare my cats into the other room over whatever their crazy mommy was doing, hopping up and doing strange dancings after each big play-I’m sure if I had been filmed I would have looked totally Brit to the outside observer.
But I now I just know that every other Duke fan and every other Carolina was feeling it so intensely as well and they would be the only ones who could actually understand what it means to have, for a few hours a game mean more than breathing.
It’s fantastic, especially when you win.
To Hate Like This is To Be Happy Forever


Barry Jacobs’ Take
Convention And Carolina Take A Beating

This was no classic moment in a cherished series, no game to remember for its twists and turns, its suspense and drama. Then again, what emerged from Duke’s 89-78 victory over the homestanding Tar Heels, the most points scored against North Carolina this year, will likely shape the remainder of the 2008 ACC regular season race.

And, most assuredly, the first clash between the ACC’s reigning powers will bolster each team’s expectation of success when they re-engage a month from now at Cameron Indoor Stadium.

Duke continues to emerge as what coach Mike Krzyzewski said is a “very unconventional team,” finding its strength where others might see weakness. Basketball is usually played from the inside out – getting high-percentage interior shots and earning trips to the foul line have been coaching staples for a century. But this Blue Devil squad has inverted the formula, its success indicated by a 20-1 record, eight wins and no losses in the ACC, and a No. 2 standing in the national polls.

Krzyzewski has been informed by his sojourn as head coach of the U.S. Olympic team, where he trades ideas and stratagems with professional colleagues Mike D’Antoni of the Phoenix Suns and Nate McMillan of the Portland Trail Blazers, among others.

Instead of trying to force his 2007-08 squad into a mold that did not readily fit, Krzyzewski altered the mold.

These Blue Devils attack from the outside in, either by shot or drive. Leave too much space and Duke begins firing from the perimeter. Guard too closely and the Devils take the ball to the basket, garnering layups and fouls or passing unselfishly to a dangerous cadre of shooters who lurk around the 3-point arc like buzzards circling a promising snack.

Duke employed its preferred approach from the outset at the Smith Center, unleashing a barrage of 3-pointers against the more conventionally configured Tar Heels.

North Carolina feeds the ball assiduously to the low post, where Tyler Hansbrough wreaks havoc on defenses and Deon Thompson provides stylish accompaniment. Against Duke, 17 of the Heels’ first 23 points came from that pair.

Clemson extended UNC to overtime a month ago by deploying its deep corps of powerful frontline players to stifle Hansbrough. The arrangement essentially dared other Heels to pick up the scoring slack. Wing Wayne Ellington responded to the tune of 36 points, a personal best, as UNC won by a basket.

Duke made a different choice. With limited options in the low post, it harassed Hansbrough but ceded sufficient room for him to contribute 28 points and 18 rebounds. “The kid’s a great player,” Krzyzewski said. “He takes competitiveness to the highest level.”

Aided greatly by the absence of injured UNC playmaker Ty Lawson, the Blue Devils’ aggressive perimeter defense kept the remainder of the Tar Heels off balance. Exclude Hansbrough, and the Heels made a third of their shots (16-of-48).

“We knew Tyler was going to score the ball, but one of the keys to the game was that really no one else scored points or really did much,” said Duke freshman Kyle Singler. He contributed 14 points and 10 rebounds matched against Hansbrough. “We stand by our defense with great ball pressure, contesting the wings, just force people to be uncomfortable.”

North Carolina’s chief outside threats, Ellington and Danny Green, were a combined 1-11 on threes. Neither scored enough to threaten the two-basket working margin the Blue Devils maintained for most of the second half.

“We weren’t patient,” Roy Williams said of his UNC squad. “I thought we rushed our shots. We didn’t make them play defense.”

Duke also forced 20 turnovers, one short of North Carolina’s season high, and thereby negated any disadvantage on the boards. UNC's young big men Thompson, who fouled out in 18 minutes, and Alex Stepheson, with five turnovers and no assists, were repeatedly caught in uncomfortable situations away from the basket on both offense and defense.

The Devils themselves appeared relatively at ease amid the Dean Dome din. They took the lead for good midway through the period by hitting four consecutive 3-pointers, part of an 8-for-16 onslaught in the period. On the night, Duke hit 13 of 29 from long range, 44.8 percent accuracy. Junior guard Greg Paulus was 6 of 8 on threes, the highest output of his career.

“They got any shot they wanted,” Williams groused. “I don’t know very many times tonight that our defense dictated what shots they got.”

The North Carolina coach did pronounce himself “very impressed” with Duke, however. “They’ve got great chemistry,” he said. “The most disciplined team won the game tonight. The team that did most of the little things well won the game tonight.”

Clearly, though, the absence of Lawson, North Carolina fleet point guard, altered the equation. “You want everybody” able to play, Krzyzewski said. “And certainly you want the quickest point guard in the country to be playing. That has to hurt, no question about it.”

So Duke emerged with a victory, a two-game lead in the ACC race, and the confidence it can defeat UNC even on its home court. The Tar Heels came away from the game knowing that, with the return of Lawson, their catalytic agent, they will be a different and probably better team the next time they face the Blue Devils.

No doubt,but then it’ll be in The Greatest Place on Earth, Cameron Indoor. I can't hardly wait

This may interest only me but, then again most of the stuff on this site probably only interests me.
Here are some game notes from GoDuke.com

No. 2 Duke defeated No. 3 North Carolina, 89-78, on February 6, 2008, at the Dean Smith Center. Duke improves to 20-1 overall and 8-0 in the ACC while the Tar Heels fall to 21-2 and 6-2, respectively.

Series Notes

• Duke snaps a three-game win streak by UNC in the series, including a one-game streak in the Smith Center, and Duke now trails 127-97 overall and 13-10 in Smith Center all-time In ACC regular season play, Duke trails 85-76 in regular season conference play, including trailing 58-30 in Chapel Hill
• Coach Mike Krzyzewski improves to an even 32-32 against North Carolina. [Ed. Note: Yay K!]
  
• Duke’s 10 wins at the Smith Center are the most by any opponent in UNC history. In the ACC, Maryland has eight wins here, N.C. State five, Wake Forest four, Florida State and Georgia Tech three, Virginia two, Boston College, Miami and Virginia Tech one apiece and Clemson has not won at the Smith Center.
• Wednesday marked the 125th straight game that at least one team was ranked in the AP poll and 143 of the 159 match-ups since the inception of the AP poll in 1947-48. When both teams are ranked, Duke leads the series 32-31, including a 25-18 mark under Coach K. Duke is 20-18 when both teams are ranked in the Top 10 and now 3-3 when both teams are ranked in the Top 3.

Milestones

• Duke’s 20-1 record through 20 games matches the best start in school history.
• Duke now has 43 seasons with 20 or more wins, including 23 under Coach K and a streak of 12 straight seasons.
• Duke now has 33 wins against teams ranked in the Top 3 of the AP poll.

Win Streaks & Records

• Duke has won 10 straight games overall and all eight of its ACC games at the mid-point of the conference season.
• Duke is 8-0 in the ACC this season and now has a two-game lead in the ACC standings with North Carolina holding onto second place at 6-2.
• Duke has now played in front of a sold out venue in 225 of its last 263 games.
• Duke has won 24 of its last 34 games when both teams ranked in the Top 10 of the AP poll.
• Duke is now 19-11 in 30 games under Coach K when both teams are ranked in the Top 5 of the AP poll.

Duke In February

• Duke is now 488-258 all-time in February, including 161-60 under Coach K. Duke has won six of its last seven and is 65-20 since 1997-98.
• Duke is 3-1 vs. UNC on Feb. 6, including 3-0 all-time in Chapel Hill. The last Duke-UNC game on Feb. 6 was 48 years ago. Overall on Feb. 6, Duke is 16-13 on this date, including 4-2 under Coach K.

Team Highs & Lows

• Duke scored a UNC opponent season high 89 points.
• With 27 free throws, Duke matched UNC’s opponent high for the season.
• Duke’s 47 points matched the most given up by North Carolina in a half this season.
  

Duke Offense

• Duke was 13-of-29 from long distance against North Carolina, marking the ninth time this season the Blue Devils have connected on 10 or more from behind the arc and Duke is 9-0 in those games.
• Duke had six players score in double figures including all five starters and Jon Scheyer off the bench. It was just the second game all season that six Blue Devils scored in double figures along with seven players in the season opener against N.C. Central.
• Duke’s bench outscored North Carolina’s bench 22-4, including 17 points from Scheyer.

Duke Defense

• Duke held North Carolina to just 3-of-17 from behind the arc, extending its streak to all eight ACC games holding opponents to four or less three-pointers. In ACC games, Duke’s opponents have connected on 28-of-101 (.277) from behind the arc.
• Duke forced 20 turnovers from the Blue Devils while allowing 17 assists. It marked the 11th time this season Duke’s opponent has had 20 or more turnovers and is the 18th time in 21 games that Duke’s opponent has had more turnovers than assists.
• Duke had 11 steals against North Carolina, marking the sixth time in eight ACC games Duke has had 10 or more steals. Duke is averaging 10.4 steals per game in ACC action.
• Duke held North Carolina to 28-of-69 (.406) from the field, marking the 18th time this season Duke has held its opponent under 50 percent. Under Coach K, Duke has accomplished that feat 693 times in 925 games and is 613-80 in those game.
• Duke was outrebounded by North Carolina by nine but were down 10 in the category at halftime. Duke outrebounded North Carolina 22-21 in the second half.

Coach K

• Coach K is now 795-262 as a head coach, ranking sixth on the NCAA wins chart and second among active coaches. Only Eddie Sutton, who is fifth overall and tops among active coaches with 800 wins is ahead of him while first overall is Coach K’s college coach the recently retired Bob Knight, with 902 wins.
• With 795 career wins in his first 33 seasons, Coach K is currently second on the NCAA’s list of most victories in a coaches’ first 33 season. He trails Dean Smith, who had 802 wins through 33 seasons.
• Coach K now has 795 wins in 1,057 career games and is looking to become the third-fastest coach to 800 wins based on number of games. Adolph Rupp (972) and Dean Smith (1,029) are already out of reach and Bob Knight is currently third, accomplishing the feat in (1,102 games).
• Coach K now has 722 wins at Duke and ranks seventh on the NCAA’s chart for most wins at one school. In sixth place is DePaul’s Ray Meyer with 724. Coach K is also second among active coaches behind Syracuse’s Jim Boeheim (765).

DeMarcus Nelson

• The senior scored 13 points, shooting 6-of-7 from the line with the majority of those down the stretch, and added five assists, four rebounds and a steal in just 23 minutes with foul trouple.
• Nelson now has 1,160 career points and surpassed Carroll Youngkin (1959-71 – 1,154) to move into 39th on Duke’s career scoring chart. Immediately ahead is Tommy Amaker (1984-87 – 1,168).
• Nelson now has 18 games in double figures this season including six straight and 13 of his last 14, and in 61 career games.

Greg Paulus

• The junior led Duke with 18 points, connecting on 6-of-9 from the field and was 6-of-8 from behind the arc. He recorded a season-high tying four steals and added three assists and three rebounds, as well.
• He now has 11 games in double figures this season, including five straight (and 10 straight games with nine-plus points). He now has 43 career games in double figures.
• Paulus now has six games with three or more steals this season and 16 such games in his career.
• Paulus now has eight games this season with three or more three-pointers and 21 such games in his career.

Jon Scheyer

• The sophomore scored 17 points, including 7-of-8 from the line and 2-of-4 from behind the arc. He added six rebounds, three assist and three steals in 33 minutes off the bench.
• Scheyer now has 12 games in double figures, including his first in the last five games, and 34 double figure scoring games in his career.
• Scheyer’s three steals is a season high and the fifth time in his career he’s had three or more steals.

Kyle Singler

• The freshman had 14 points and 10 rebounds in 37 minutes while shooting 5-of-11 from the field, 3-of-6 from long range, and 1-of-2 from the line. He added two assists, two blocks and two rebounds.
• Singler has 15 games scoring in double figures, including three straight and seven of his last eight.
• Singler now has three games with 10 or more rebounds and three double-doubles, as well.
• Singler now has four games with three or more threes on the season and he has hit at least one three in nine straight games, the third longest streak in the ACC.
• Singler matched his season best with two steals.

Gerald Henderson

• The sophomore scored 12 points, grabbed seven rebounds, dished out three assists and had two steals against the Tar Heels.
• Henderson now has 17 games scoring in double figures this season, including seven of the last eight, and 24 in his career.
• Henderson was just one rebound shy of his career high of eight.

Lance Thomas

• The sophomore scored 10 points, grabbed five rebounds and had two blocks in 25 minutes while shooting 5-of-7 from the field against North Carolina.
• Thomas matched his season high for points and now has two games in double figures and five in his career.
• Thomas recorded a new career high with two blocks.
• Thomas matched his season high with five rebounds.

With The Win, Duke Improved To...

• 1,841-805 all-time, including 722-203 under Coach K
• 504-270 all-time in ACC regular season play, including 280-123 under Coach K and 149-35 since 1996-97
• 830-470 all-time against current members of the ACC
• Duke is 171-43 outside of Cameron since 1997-98 and 80-24 in road contests and 85-24 in ACC road play since 1997-98
• 240-240 all-time vs. ranked teams, including 160-110 under Coach K and 44-18 against ACC ranked teams since 1997-98
• Duke improves to 12-21 vs. the No. 3 ranked team in the AP poll all time.
• 253-47 this decade, more wins than any other team in the NCAA
• 899-227 all-time as a ranked team all-time, including 104-15 as the No. 2 team, 391-73 as a Top 3 team, 481-89 as a Top 5 and 757-170 as a Top 10 team

Oh and that's a 2 game lead in the ACC, most practically.
And with that this should be my first and only Carolina post of the day…unless of course

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