Showing posts with label getting me on the government watch list. Show all posts
Showing posts with label getting me on the government watch list. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

I Love This Dog

Uno! The Best Dog in the World! here he is on the Early Show

OMG it is the most perfect dog I've ever seen too. He's sooo cute I can barely stand it

Some other thoughts on last night at Westminster:

  • I've decided I really want a long haired chihuaha- Paloma was so pretty last night
  • The Pekingese may be the ugliest dog ever
  • I didn't realize Great Danes are that chill that they could live in an apartment- that was surprising. Eva from last night was gorgeous.
  • The Samoyed was just stunning and so pure and white
  • The Tibetan mastiff from the working group had the most heart string adorable face ever
  • The Neapolitian Mastiff, which apparently was the same breed as Fang from Harry Potter, was the scariest dog ever but I liked its gait
  • The woman who judged the working dogs was so old as she went around calling them out and picking their order it was so slow but added so much drama
  • My dog could never do any of the dog show stuff- he'd go around peeing on everything and barking. He does both a lot

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Monday, November 26, 2007

Tim Minchin: Definitely Funnier Than Yahoo Serious

The L.A. Times today had a profile of the Australian comedian Tim Minchin that asked the question: "Could this be comedy's next superstar?" With the subtitle "[he] might or might not be the next big thing" and so of course in my pursuit of new hottness and things that I can find and love but then disavow when they get big and "sell out" I decided to check out some of his stuff and I have to say he is really hard to categorize

hH ranges from a pretty straight cover of Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah (the only thing in it that's funny is the guy at about 1:02 who proclaims in disbelief "You've gotta be fucking kidding me)

to a surprisingly heartwarming original song about acceptance and being okay with what you've got called "Not Perfect"

A song that sounds like it really could be from like Ben Folds, "Rock n Roll Nerd"

to a song about true love and relationships, "If You Really Loved Me"

or the benefits of synthetic humans, "Inflatable You"

A poetic reading and exploration of one's own psychology "Angry [feet]"

and a summary of Donnie Darko (that finally helped me understand that film)

and his interest range all the way to the geopolitical, and environmental concerns as can be evidenced by this medley of "A Peace Anthem for Palestine/ Canvas Bag"

but all in all he's pretty brilliant (with songs that are really catchy). His piano playing is really impressive and unlike Flight of the Conchords I can actually listen to him for more than 5 minutes at a time without getting annoyed. And so while I don't know what makes the "next big thing" (middle america/frat types-I can't get into their heads) I really enjoyed him (the first thing that really made me laugh over the past few days) and he is probably the greatest Australian comedic export ever (though when your main competition* is Yahoo Serious and Paul Hogan that distinction may not be that hard to achieve.)

*and I'm sure there are a lot of great Australian comedians, but I'm drawing a blank right now

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Hmm...Maybe I Should Rethink My Plans

so as I wrote to one of my friends if the election "turns out wrong" (i.e. Barack wins) I was going to move to South America, maybe Venezuela to live under a socialist government but anywhere really.As I told her I'm sure I can find a revolution down there in some country, there always seems to be a few bubbling at any given time, and in America we don't talk or think of "revolution" we talk of "change" which is just b.s..... I'm just horribly restless right now and want something different.

Then I plucked up the energy to check CNN.com this morning and found this story (one in a new series of people who are a lot like me/ maybe I'm not that special anyway) about a Dutch woman who went to Colombia to join FARC and fight, in her mind, for equality and hope and freedom and all that idealistic jazz.
But apparently the dream of heroic and beautiful revolutions and that ideal that has been seen from Lord Byron to Che to Fielding Mellish, unfortunately maybe it's not quite the reality

"I'm tired, tired of the FARC, tired of the people, tired of communal living. Tired of never having anything for myself," wrote the author, a 29-year-old Dutch woman.

This would be worth it if I knew I was fighting for something. But I don't really believe that anymore"
Yeah, disillusionment sucks.

In the diary, Nijmeijer abhors the strict discipline imposed by FARC's male commanders -- no smoking, no phone calls, no romantic relationships without their consent. She says the rank and file are hungry and bored, and describes FARC leaders as both materialistic and corrupt.

"How will it be when we take power? The wives of the commanders in Ferrari Testa Rossas with breast implants eating caviar?" she writes.

[snip]

"In certain circles in Europe, there still exists the romantic image of the guerrillas as Robin Hood, or Che Guevara, fighting the bad guys for the benefit of the poor," he said.

So what you’re saying is that these brutal paramilitary groups aren’t heroic and good hearted but rather full of those who have been corrupted by the very evils of the society they fight against?
Who knew?

Felipe Salazar, who quit the rebels last year, said Nijmeijer likely was punished for indirectly aiding the enemy -- forced to build trenches or demoted to cooking duty -- but not killed. He said Nijmeijer's only hope of being reunited with her family probably would be to embark on a risky escape

That sucks , though I was worried that she would’ve been executed; thank god for small mercies.


I still think her mistake was she joined up with the FARC who haven't been "good guys" for decades. What I think I'll do is maybe get with a less hierarchical and perhaps smaller and less strict organization. A grassroots revolution. Because seriously if I can't dance I don't want to be a part of your revolution...
as "Red" Emma Goldman said: "I insisted that our cause could not expect me to behave as a nun and that the movement should not be turned into a cloister. If it meant that, I did not want it. I want freedom, the right to self expression, everybody's right to beautiful, radiant things"
exactly.

Either way let’s hope she gets out of it all okay...

[Related: From the 11/27 L.A. Times comes an article about "Female rebels' fates diverge in Colombia" that deals in large part to disillusionment, gender inequality and government programs designed to lure out and change guerilla fighters]

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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Hubby Mix: II (Post 700!)

So in one of her rare trips into town Hubby sent me a request for some other songs I guess she's been missing, and me being in love with her in our way of course had to oblige.
Once again these are songs she wanted, a few of them I had never heard before or hadn't heard in years so it was a good little refresher. And hopefully it'll make a nice Christmas present for her ( U.S. to Burkina Faso mail takes like 3 weeks- pretty ridic.)

And so since this is my 700th post I decided to give you all a gift as well.
Anyway here is The Hubby Mix II
(the first 18 songs she specifically requested)
1.) Delta Goodrem- Born To Try

2.) Squeezed- Tempted

3.) Dispatch- The General

4.) Prince- Kiss

5.) Dusty Springfield- Son of a Preacher Man

6.) Billy Joel- Vienna

7.) Better Than Ezra- Desperately Wanting

8.) Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo`ole- Somewhere Over the Rainbow

9.) The Calling- We’re Forgiven

10.) Sly and the Family Stone- Que Sera, Sera

11.) Van Morrison- Crazy Love

12.) Van Morrison- Caravan

13.) Tori Amos- Father Figure [download]
14.) Bill Withers- Lean on Me [download]
15.) Philip Glass- Metamorphosis Two [download]
16.) Don Mclean- American Pie


Disc 2
17.)Sinead O'Connor- Nothing Compares 2 U

18.) Rihanna- Umbrella


(and since I didn’t want to waste a disc justfor two songs here were some songs I put on that I thought she might like or that related to the above songs. i'll keep any other meanings, as obvious as they are, unsaid.)
C.S.S- Music is My Hot Hot Sex

Doris Day-Que Sera, Sera

Philp Glass- “Heroes”

Mandy Moore- Umbrella
Dishwalla- Counting Blue Cars

PJ Harvey- Before Departure

Joanna Newsom- Sawdusts and Diamonds

Carole King- You’ve Got A Friend [download]
Sarah Mclachlan- The Rainbow Connection

Emilie-Claire Barlow-La Belle Dame Sans Regrets

Oasis- Live Forever
Hair Original Cast -Flesh Failures (Let The Sunshine In)

as always there's amazon and iTunes.

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Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Revolutionaries or Terrorists: Who Decides?

to misquote Barry Goldwater (of whom I watched a pretty good documentary and no longer hate as much) Extremism in the pursuit of Liberty is no vice.
Anyway I don't know why exactly I thought about it* but last night for what must have been about an hour while lying in bed half asleep all I could think about was the notion of who decides a revolutionary from a terrorist. The acts of a revolutionary can often be confused with the methods of a terrorist. Is it because revolutionaries are thought to be following a more political ideology and fighting for a "more rational" end and terrorists, at least in our present conception of the idea, follow a more religious path which is irrational just by its very nature.
Are the Sons of Liberty thought to be terrorists, even though many of their acts can be considered terroristic? No they're thought of as patriots and revolutionaries?
Were not all of those who took up arms against the Crown in the Revolutionary War terrorists/insurgents/ and Al Qaida in America?
Was the bombing of the King David Hotel the act of terrorists or patriots?
The 26th of July Movement- revolutionaries or terrorists?
The May 1968 student protests?
The Black Panthers/ Weather Underground/SLA- where do they fall? Will their public perception rise or have they been painted with a tar that can't be washed out.

I realize that history is written by the winners, often in the blood of the defeated, and I kind of wish I had written this this morning when I woke up and was still full of thoughts and passion, but will if the "terrorists" achieve their aims, as amorphous as they may seem, will Al Qaida be recognized in a greater part of the world as a modern day band of revolutionaries. Or must we agree and support with their goals before we bless them with the more heroic title of revolutionary. I guess maybe I thought of this whole subject and argument (which was weak and full of repitiion and no solid evidence) because I was thinking about the PKK and how they have been branded as a terrorist organization, even though by the Kurdish people I'm sure they're thought to be fighting for freedom, extremist in pursuit of liberty and that that title has only been given to them by those who are against their ideals and goals and beliefs and to label someone with such a title is to strip them of any dignity and credibility and legitimicy.

And so while I was thinking about that and thinking of maybe trying to figure out how to use that for BBE* I thought of some songs that kind of remind me of revolution. So here are some poems from the 60s when revolution was really in the air

Imamu Amiri Baraka- Our Nation Is Like Ourselves


The Last Poets- Wake Up Nigger


The Last Poets- Niggers Are Scared of Revolution


Gil Scott Heron- The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

The Last Poets- When The Revolution Comes


The Last Poets-Run Niggers


Sometimes I think I was born too late...

* I just remembered. I was thinking about an animation parody for like youtube, or whatever, of what would have happened to the "indians" in the Boston Tea Party if it had taken place in today's climate. I figured that they would be sent to a Gitmo or a "black site" unless they were able to watch the brown from their skin and be seen as white men. Something like that.

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Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Pictures of The Prophet

So I heard about the controversy over Lars Vilk and his cartoon, the one where he depicts the prophet Muhammad's head on a dog but I could find it nowhere on the internet, as I wished to satisfy my morbid infidel curiosity (and then be disappointed by the fact it is really nothing more exciting than a cartoon.) But while google image searching the prophet Muhammad I came upon these (as well as this nifty chart). So enjoy.النبي محمّد ، بركات وسلام على ه
(P.S.The two best college basketball player's names: God Shammgod and Jihad Muhammad. I'm sure the latter has easy times getting on planes.
and on a totally different topic today is the 29 anniversary of my favorite Christian Karol Wojtyla becoming my favorite pope John Paul II, who after he died I played and won many a game of beiruts and dedicated it to him. JP 2!
And I've decided I really enjoy being an infidel. I mean you can kiss boys, drink, smoke, show your face, eat a ham sandwich and go to hell with all the cool kids. What's not to love?)

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Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Best Band Ever*

*according to me, at this moment, subject to change
let's continue with the revolutionary ideals of last night, shall we? Anyway today is the 40th anniversary of Ernesto Guevara's execution. Though he's known as Che after seeing the Motorcyle Diaries I think I like calling him Fuser more. Che was an inspiration to me, as he must be in order for me to hold onto my poser socialist revolutionary self image, the whole idea of taking off before medical school and seeing the truth about the injustice of the world, of being born to privilege and still turning your back on it, the beret, are all things that I'm still trying to attain. Plus the idea of him fomenting revolution in Africa as well as Latin America is really cool (and yeah I know all the horrible things he did in pursuit of revolution but let's not ruin a perfectly good narrative with gradiations of character and facts) When he was captured in Bolivia he was ordered to be executed because They did not want to give him a stage to espouse his beliefs and so he was killed and cleaned up and lain on a table to prove that both the man and his ideals had been killed.
Yeah about that...when the president of Bolivia comes to the site of his execution and proclaims his an inspiration, when he are venerated as a saint, if not messiah (though I'm sure the anti religious Che would love that), it is probably a sign that neither the man or his core values are dead. Though having his image plastered on any and everything it can be plastered on is like the sickest irony ever. And so in order to honor Che there was only one band that came to mind the only band that actually seems to believe in the ideals of Che (or at least as much as an american rock band who still sells merchandise can) and so Rage Against the Machine is the Best Band ever.*

I think I first heard or was first exposed to Rage (as the kids call them) when I was like 13 and Bulls on Parade exploded. There was a crew of kids at my middle school who I kind of labeled informally as the Rage crew, who skateboarded and smoked and were so into the music that they were trying to start a band called Rebel Against the System, or something similar. I mean I liked the band but not to that level- I think I was more drawn to the heaviness of the music and the rap cadence more than anything else (this was in kind of my angry/disaffected phase) but now when I read the lyrics you can see the message and knowledge that passed way over my head at the time, but are still shamefully relevant today when we spend hundreds of billions on war but our schools and infrastructure are crumbling and underfunded. From Bulls on Parade
Weapons not food, not homes, not shoes
Not need, just feed the war cannibal animal
I walk tha corner to tha rubble that used to be a library
Line up to tha mind cemetary now
What we don't know keeps tha contracts alive an movin'
They don't gotta burn tha books they just remove 'em
While arms warehouses fill as quick as tha cells
Rally round tha family, pockets full of shells


Bulls on Parade [download]
(and wow I don't think I've seen that video in like ten years) Anyway I got the album Evil Empire and I remember having it in my discman while my mom was trying to take me to LACMA or something (ah teenage years) I think People of the Sun was really big to me, with the references to the spanish genocide (conquest) of the indigenous people of the americas (and really resonants after Columbus day yesterday) and the california latino history that is taught in schools in L.A.
Check it, since 1516 minds attacked and overseen
Now crawl amidst the ruins of this empty dream
Wit their borders and boots on top of us
Pullin' knobs on the floor of their toxic metropolis
But how you gonna get what you need ta get?
Tha gut eaters, blood drenched get offensive like Tet
Tha fifth sun sets get back reclaim
Tha spirit of Cuahtemoc alive an untamed
Now face tha funk now blastin' out ya speaker, on tha one Maya, Mexica
That vulture came ta try and steal ya name
But now you got a gun, yeah this is for the people of the sun

People of the Sun [download]
and their song Vietnow was another favorite having one of my favorite lines ever " I'm a truth addict/ ah shit I got a head rush" and the chorus one of those mantras I tend to live by "fear is your only god."

Vietnow [download]
Their third album Battle of Los Angeles has some of my favorite songs ever (and i apologize if the already poor writing gets even worse now, i just snuck a sandwich and to be honest, as Trent Reznor said, I like the band but all of their songs kind of sound the same, and there was no real emotional subtlety to explore. Pure visceralness leads to me repeating "the lyrics make you think and the music is awesome, which makes it even cooler that all the sounds are made by guitar, bass guitar, drums and voice." so with that warning on with the slop.)
the usual Testify

[download]
and Guerilla Radio

[download]
(there really is no band that pumps me up the same way they do, where i want to throw a molotov cocktail just to start the revolution) to Mic Check (here's a performance from a benefit for Mumia Abu-Jamal)

Mic Check (once Hunting, Now Hunted) [download] it was just a tremenous album though their self titled debut is probably my favorite of all of them. I already wrote about Wake Up as a stuck in my head song of the day [download] and Killing in the Name just so intense as is everything else about them

[download]
This video for Freedom [download]

actually inspired me to vote for Leonard Peltier in the 2004 election ( I vote in california- it's not going red)But even after they broke up I still felt I had to support them, listening to Audioslave (until I couldn't stand it anymore) and waiting and still waiting) for Zack de la Rocha's solo album buoyed by the fact it had to be amazing, based on his work with KRS-One and Last Emperor on "C.I.A. (Criminals in Action)

I still don't understand how they could have broken up right before the time they were needed most. I mean if they were that angry and militant during the 90s and the Clinton Years I can't even imagine the level of Rage (pardon the pun) they would have reached over the last 6 years. It would have been pure fire...until they were shipped to Gitmo undoubtedly.
and so for all of those reasons plus the fact that my biggest regret (ok not really but still) was leaving the DNC protests in 2000 even though I knew they would be playing a free concert that night (which turned into a mini riot and I missed :( , and plus I love the socialist khaki and star style, Rage Against the Machine is the Best Band Ever*
and you can study the lyrics to and the knowledge in all of their songs here
including the lyrics to No Shelter off of the Godzilla Soundtrack Album

[download]

Cinema, simulated life, ill drama
Fourth reich culture, Americana
Chained to the dream they got ya searchin for
The thin line between entertainment and war
There'll be no shelter here!
The frontline is everywhere

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Monday, October 8, 2007

Your Stuck in my Head Song of the Day

First off I'd like to apologize for the suckiness of today, I was just really lethargic and didn't want to write, which was a good thing because I kind of had writer's block.I was going to write about how today Columbus, who unleashed one of the greatest genocides in history is being honored, because it was done in the name of progress it is acceptable, but I didn't want to think that hard or be that passionate. So once I found out today was an actual holiday I decided to term my lack of productivity as either taking advantage of the holiday or protesting it.
And in the spirit of protest Public Enemy's Fight the Power came to me, especially the infamous lyrics
"Elvis was a hero to most
But he never meant shit to me you see
Straight up racist that sucker was
Simple and plain
Motherfuck him and John Wayne
Cause I'm Black and I'm proud
I'm ready and hyped plus I'm amped
Most of my heroes don't appear on no stamps
which is how I feel about Columbus- he's no hero to me and then when I started listening to Ice Cube back when he was a militant socially conscious rapper instead of trying to finish houses in family comedies and so that kind of made me go with that first instinct, the instinct that goes back to when Flavor Flav was a hype man sidekick instead of a racial embarassing (and quite entertaining) minstrel. And so here is Your Stuck in my Head Song of the Day, Fight The Power by Public Enemy (and here's the long version of the video- droppin' knowledge you know)

Public Enemy- Fight the Power (mp3)
I'll try to do better tomorrow, I promise.

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Sunday, October 7, 2007

Pandering to Hold Out States

So as I was studying Google analytics I was kind of surprised that not every state has sent someone to this site- there are still six hold out: Idaho, (I think) Wyoming, North Dakota, Arkansas. Delaware and Vermont- and so I decided in order to fill out the map to try to be the new source for North Idaomanwaront. I mean they even love me in Syria (p.s. سيكون البراغيث على الكلب قريبا ميّتة غير أنّ لا دون حمام. سيكون الماء قريبا يتأهّب) So on with the obvious and shameless attempts to get new fans in new states by writing about things I have no knowledge or idea about:

Idaho- Home of my favorite gay senator but also other things. I was actually pretty good friends with two guys from Idaho at Duke, one who is from Emmett, went to Parma High School and worked on a cattle show farm (or something like that) and the other from Eagle High. But in other news I am actually shocked that a grizzly was shot and killed near Priest Lake just because it would stand its ground when a human came near. Isn't that the American Way and the way of the West to not back down? For shame, I blame Gov. Butch Otter, maybe if he wasn't galavanting all over Red China he'd know what it means to be an American and work on getting the the family doctors that Idaho needs-Idaho has the fewest doctors per capita of any state in the nation, with just 169 per 100,000 residents. And making women remove their bras before entering a courthouse, even if it does somehow set off the metal detector seems like poor form. no matter, Go Broncos! And Free Lil' Wayne!- the one time a black guy goes to Idaho he gets arrested. I'm just sayin' y'know Mark Fuhrman retired there...


Wyoming-I agree that the Mount Carmel youth ranch should be investigated and anyone who says otherwise is complicit in the abuses taking place there. And I can't believe Casper College beat Central Wyoming in volleyball. I mean Casper sucks and even they know it. And maybe if the intersection by Division just south of 33rd street had more adequate safety precautions (or lighting or something) we wouldn't have such horrific accidents as this. Go Cowboys!


North Dakota- I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing that Chuck Klosterman is the most distinguished University of North Dakota alum that I can think of. but if Lorriane Thompson keeps having games like she's been having, including 2 goals against IPFW she'll make her name as a North Dakota State legend. And is it just more or does anyone else see a relation between the number of vehicle deer collisions being more likely in these last three months of the year, 2 more people being killed in car accidents, the number of deer starting to level off and the UND Indian Services director calling the nickname policy unfair? I mean you don't want to piss of Native Americans everyone knows how much havoc and ruin can be brought by building on Indian graveyards but imagine what power live Native Americans could have, especially as they gather at the Crazy Horse Memorial for the Native America Day events which would be cool to go to. The story of that Monument is amazing- a lot more compelling than Mount Rushmore (oh those are in South Dakota right?)


Arkansas- The story of John McLendon of Monticello kind of getting revenge for a 4 foot alligator biting his friend, by killing a 12 foot alligator probably would have been more interesting if it was the same alligator all grown up. But i guess it is still a feat, I know I would have fled in terror at the mere sight of either. I'm not big on hunting but I'm calling on all hunters and boaters or whoever to do their part and help battle the spread of zebra mussels in Bulls Shoal Lake. Contrary to what Otis Kirk says 20 oral commitments to the Razorback football team is the end of the world, especially considering the fact I see no 5 star game breakers which we'll need when Darren mcfadden goes pro. I think this is another indication that Houston Nutt (hehe) is not the recruiter he was once rumoured to be and so he needs to go. Better now than later. And Mike Huckabee, who I hate because he's conservative but enjoy because his last name is Huckabee and he doesn't seem that angry, looked really weird when he was fat, like he was only wearing a fat suit (and his dramatic weight loss was faked and all part of an elaborate campaign strategy. That would be genius)


Delaware- Um has no sales tax.
"Wayne Campbell: Or, imagine, being able to be magically whisked away to... Delaware.
[pauses]
Wayne Campbell: Hi. I'm in Delaware."
j/k I actually like Delaware and actually applied to be a Blue Hen (before I reconsidered) which would have sucked this weekend, losing to New Hampshire and all and so I feel a connection and am in favor of the Rehoboth Beach turbine program because even if it ruins the aesthetics it is better for everyone in the long run- like Joe Biden becoming president. And something really needs to be done about US 113, I mean can't a man walk in a traffic lane at 1 in the morning in a dense fog without fear of getting hit by two cars? Did I mention it has no sales tax (or at least it didn't once upon a glorious time)


Vermont- As I said before I was actually shocked that no one from Vermont has been on this site because it actually is one of my favorite states. I really wanna move up there and run a record store/book store/coffee shop, when I'm like 50 and have my hair in long braids and a small part of me wants to go there now and work for Outright Vermont (but probably not) I remember going there once and staying with a few AmeriCorps friends who were at Goodard college and we saw the first Kill Bill in the theater in downtown Montpelier. And so in honor of my favorite New England state, and their amazing and simple license plates here is the 802 rap which I first heard about through this article in the times.
C$ and Run Rhyme with 802

I wonder if they're going to UVM- i mean they better. Catamounts are the shit (you can watch their women's hockey play against Sacred Heart here)

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Friday, October 5, 2007

Thoughts I Had Today

while reading this week's Rolling Stone in a waiting room.
1: For some reason Rolling Stone still thinks Kid Rock is relevant. I mean the cover is so full of cliches that it must be a parody of Kid Rock. He's surrounded by 4 implanted models in black lingerie, two of whom are staring at him with an unmistakable look of lust while the other two models are gazing at the other girls with that same lustful leer. It's really sad and the fact this is the "hot issue" I know I'm not the target audience but I really thought Rolling Stone tried to appeal to most demographics and not just frat types who view this cover as their fantasy and American Bad ass as their theme song.

Due: Sometimes I really don't think about things but just know them to be wrong. Like the Republican mantra " we fight them over there so we don't have to fight them over here" it never really made sense to me, but I never thought about it- it was just one of those things that GWeeB always said so I just assumed it was dumb and wrong. But while reading Matt Tabibi's profile on John McCain's campaign and his questioning about why or how is that true "if the terrorists want to fight us here, how are we going to stop them by going to Iraq? Are we tying up air traffic controllers?" I think I understand the rationale- it's not we fight them over there so they can't come here, it's hopefully we kill them all so they can't, but you can't kill everyone of them and more will grow, and even if you kill all the organizers, you can't kill ideas and, in many areas the youth are more radical and gung ho than the elders. Then I thought, and I may be the only person who wold think this, but that since the goal of terrorists is to kill Americans, to humiliate America and basically destroy removing it from the Middle East, that are fighting them over there is almost a concesssion to them. That we will offer up the 150,000 or so American troops and others who will serve as targets, so that all terrorists or jihadist will come to Iraq seeing it as a hunting ground where they can kill and do their part to humiliate Americans, in a way keeping them busy with abundant targets in a more accessible location so they won't feel as strong a need to satisfy their thirst for American blood by coming over to the states, or attacking other targets. Like a trap, we lure them all there (except our closing mechanism is a little broken) And by offering the soldiers as sacrifices and potential sacrifices it is a very morbid and brutal mutual beneficial deal- regular American civilians aren't being bombed weekly at night clubs (see Israel) in exchange for extremists getting a chance to humiliate us on the world stage, leading to a loss of prestige and power and (probably eventually) driving us from the Middle East. (if that made any sense at all.)

C: i'm horrible at being a guy.

and Four:that Jerome Corsi, who was behind the Swift Boat Veterans For Truth, fears John Edwards- though he may not see it that way. When asked to "swift boat" major democratic candidates, he labeled John Edwards as "The Emotional Basketcase"- from his analysis "The obvious thing about Edwards has already been done- the Breck Girl stuff, his vanity. I would go back to his medical malpractice cases and read them all closely; he tends to give emotionally driven presentations as if he is talking to a jury. I would push him to express his feelings. The more he does that the less the American People will trust him"
What? Is he trying to say that John's emotions are phony are that they are too real but Americans don't trust emotions? I am obviously biased and a big believer in emotionality so I don't buy the fact that if he expresses his feelings, and they are genuine that such a thing could hurt him. Sure he has passion but that's what we need- when is passion in pursuit of the right cause a bad thing? I think that Corsi is trying to label John as effeminate, vain and emotional (gay.) Whatever, America loves him and he really is the strongest Democratic candidate- from my Edwards propaganda email: (see video)
Yesterday, in Columbus, Kentucky - a town of 229 people - about 2,000 people turned out to see John speak. That's almost nine times the number of people who live there.
They literally came from miles around for one simple reason - they want change, and they know John is the man to deliver it.
The crowd proved what we've all known all along: John is the only candidate in this race who can compete and win in places like Columbus, Kentucky.
Can you imagine what it would be like to have a Democratic candidate who can compete and win anywhere in the country? A candidate who can connect with people in Columbus and put states like Oklahoma in play?
I can - because I saw it with my own eyes. And I know you can, too - because that candidate is John Edwards. Yesterday, the good people of Columbus, Kentucky proved us right.
Want hard evidence? Look at the facts. Just yesterday, the political website Real Clear Politics ran a story with the headline, "Edwards, Not Hillary, Is Dems' Best Chance." Also yesterday, the polling firm Rasmussen Reports summed up the polling they've been doing since the race started with the headline, "Edwards Strongest Democrat in General Election Match-ups." And the day before, a major poll came out showing John beating all of the Republican candidates in Oklahoma - a state that George Bush carried by double digits in 2004!
I've been in politics a while, and I've never seen anything like what I saw yesterday. Everyone I talked to agreed that this was the biggest crowd Columbus, Kentucky had ever seen.

Damn straight.


and I didn't learn this from Rolling Stone but I'd like to point out that the 2 of the Biggest American Disgraces, and liars of the past year, Mike Nifong and Marion Jones are both Tar Heels. I'm just saying...

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Thursday, October 4, 2007

Can I Sign Up for the Mujaha-queen?

I guess this was last night (my body is so out of whack I can't stay up late anymore) but I don't know...

Steven Colbert, in my new favorite segment The Gay Roundup (the intro is a.maz.ing.), talks to Dan Savage who is cursed with the same surname as his total opposite (who will never be mentioned by me because he's a moron.)


And I don't fault Larry Craig. Now that he's not resigning I have to support our LGBT senator(s.) I really think that he's going to full embrace the culture and community and so is waiting for the 11th, and National Coming Out Day.
Yup- that is soo what's going to happen...

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Tuesday, October 2, 2007

A Song Written and Produced by The RNC

Note to ONN: videos of domestic abuse and rape not funny. Videos making fun of conservatives I can get behind.
Country Music Stars Challenge Al-Qaeda With Patriotic New Song �Bomb New York�

and you can download it here!I know Gweeb will; he's been singing this song for years.
Amazing. I would not be surprised if Toby Keith did a cover version of this and invited Rudy on stage with him. With an orgy of red white and blue in the back of the stage of course.

Sometimes I wonder if another attack did happen would people lean towards the rhetoric of the republicans and rely on them for safety, or would another attack push voters away and maybe make them blame the republicans and their policies for not actually doing anything they said they would over the past 6 years to prevent such an attack.

Seriously though let's hope we don't find out.

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Friday, September 28, 2007

Do I Deserve To Be A Citizen?

Good thing I don't actually have to worry about my citizenship by the luck of me being born here but for those millions who weren't so lucky they have to pass tests to see if, I guess if they're worthy of this great land. Do other countries have these kind of tests? I'd just like to know for when I inevitably renounce my U.S. citizenship and become an expat.
This is a new redesign of the test with I think more open ended or multiple answer questions so I suppose people will actually learn the spirit of America instead of just memorizing obscure facts (when was the war of 1812?)
Anyway.
Here are the questions reproduced below so you can see how well you'd do if you were as motivated and proud as the new citizens are.

  1. What is the supreme law of the land?
  2. What does the Constitution do?
  3. The idea of self-government is in the first three words of the Constitution. What are these words?
  4. What is an amendment?
  5. What do we call the first ten amendments to the Constitution?
  6. What is one right or freedom from the First Amendment?
  7. How many amendments does the Constitution have?
  8. What did the Declaration of Independence do? [this one seems pretty obvious, I must say]
  9. What are two right in the Declaration of Independence?
  10. What is freedom of religion?
  11. What is the economic system in the United States? [I feel "unjust" would not be accepted here]
  12. What is the "rule of law"?
  13. Name one branch or part of the government?
  14. What stops one branch of government from becoming too powerful?
  15. Who is in charge of the executive branch?
  16. Who makes federal laws?
  17. What are the two parts of the U.S. Congress?
  18. How many U.S. Senators are there?
  19. We elect a Senator for how many years?
  20. Who is one of your state's U.S. Senators?
  21. The House of Representatives has how many voting members?
  22. We elect a U.S. Representative for how many years? [this really should be doubled]
  23. Name your U.S. Representative.
  24. Who does a U.S. Senator represent?
  25. Why do some states have more Representatives than other states?
  26. We elect a President for how many years?
  27. In what month do we vote for President?
  28. What is the name of the President of the United States now? [Gweeb doesn't count]
  29. What is the name of the Vice President of the United States now? [asshole doesn't count]
  30. If the President can no longer serve, who becomes President?
  31. If both the President and the Vice President can no longer serve, who becomes President?
  32. Who is the Commander in Chief of the military?
  33. Who signs bills to become laws?
  34. Who vetoes bills?
  35. What does the President's Cabinet do?
  36. What are two Cabinet-level positions?
  37. What does the judicial branch do?
  38. What is the highest court in the United States?
  39. How many justices are on the Supreme Court?
  40. Who is the Chief Justice of the United States?
  41. Under our Constitution, some powers belong to the federal government. What is one power of the federal government?
  42. Under our Constitution, some powers belong to the states. What is one power of the states?
  43. Who is Governor of your state?
  44. What is the capital of your state?
  45. What are the two major political parties in the United States?
  46. What is the political party of the President now?
  47. What is the name of the Speaker of the House of Representatives?
  48. There are four amendments to the Constitution about who can vote. Describe one of them.
  49. What is one responsibility that is only for United States citizens?
  50. What are two rights only for United States citizens?
  51. What are two rights of everyone living in the United States?
  52. What are two rights of everyone living in the United States?
  53. What do we show loyalty to when we say the Pledge of Allegiance?
  54. What is one promise you make when you become a United States citizen? [I never signed up for any of these]
  55. How old do citizens have to be to vote for President?
  56. What are two ways that Americans can participate in their democracy?
  57. When is the last day you can send in federal income tax forms?
  58. When must all men register for the Selective Service?
  59. What is one reason colonists came to America?
  60. Who lived in America before the Europeans arrived?
  61. What group of people was taken to America and sold as slaves?
  62. Why did the colonists fight the British?
  63. Who wrote the Declaration of Independence?
  64. When was the Declaration of Independence adopted?
  65. There were 13 original states. Name three.
  66. What happened at the Constitutional Convention?
  67. When was the Constitution written?
  68. The Federalist Papers supported the passage of the U.S. Constitution. Name on of the writers?
  69. What is one thing Benjamin Franklin is famous for? [hint; they don't include the key on the kite string story.]
  70. Who is the "Father of Our Country"?
  71. Who was the First President?
  72. What territory did the United States buy from France in 1803?
  73. Name one war fought by the United States in the 1800s.
  74. Name the U.S. war between the North and the South. [hmmph: they don't accept The War of Northern Aggression]
  75. Name one problem that led to the Civil War.
  76. What was one important thing that Abraham Lincoln did?
  77. What did the Emancipation Proclamation do?
  78. What did Susan B. Anthony do?
  79. Name one war fought by the United States in the 1900s? [what, no Grenada?]
  80. Who was President during World War I?
  81. Who was President during the Great Depression and World War II?
  82. Who did the United States fight in World War II?
  83. Before he was President, Eisenhower was a general. What war was he in? [ok this question is misleading because I'm pretty sure he served in World War I. AAAnd I'd be wrong.]
  84. What movement tried to end racial discrimination?
  85. What did Marin Luther King, Jr. do?
  86. What major event happened on September 11th? [besides Rudy getting a legacy and Gweeb finding a "destiny"]
  87. Name one American Indian tribe in the United States?
  88. Name one of the two longest rivers in the United States?
  89. What ocean is on the West Coast of the United States?
  90. What ocean is on the East Coast of the United States?
  91. Name one U.S. territory.
  92. Name one state that borders Canada.
  93. Name one state that borders Mexico.
  94. What is the capital of the United States?
  95. Where is the Statue of Liberty?
  96. Why does the flag have 13 stripes?
  97. Why does the flag have 50 stars?
  98. What is the name of the national anthem?
  99. When do we celebrate Independence Day?
  100. Name two national U.S. Holidays?


That's all of them, give or take one or two that I may have missed. I did well enough, but of course I had the answers in front of me. And I'm a nerd.



Full U.S. Citizenship Test: Questions and Answers (pdf)

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Tuesday, September 25, 2007

There Are No Gay People in The World of Islam

and by no gay people I mean everyone in Islamic Countries seems at least a little gay.
As I'm sure you've heard Mahmoud at Columbia yesterday asserted that he can't oppress homosexuals because there are none in Iran. Interesting.
Radar however has some rather convincing evidence to the contrary including the documentary Out in Iran which is actually incredibly interesting.
Even the layout of the country, in relation to the Strait of Hormuz seems to imply Iran is the "passive partner" in boi-on-boi fun time. And who knew Tehran is the sex change capital of the world? Here I was thinking about moving and working in Brazil, or just going to Thailand or Trinidad, Colorado. Silly Silly me. Oh well; the more you know.
Maybe such effeminate behaviors and appearances are common in Persia This slideshow from Slate V of Thomas Dworzak showing secret Taliban photographs shows that many of these Holy Warriors may be better than I am at make-up

But to be honest maybe they can't help I mean have you seen the Prophet Mohammed? Sooooo gay. In every one of these images he's literally "flaming" even when he's giving away his daughter Fatima to Ali

seriously do you notice where Ali's hand is in this picture?

(but no I'm not necessarily suggesting the prophet Mohammed was gay. Maybe bi.)
In all serious I thought this was very good stuff to learn about Iran and that maybe I could work there- I do love my queer kids.

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Monday, September 24, 2007

Political Porno: On "Beefcakes" And Beef "Fakes"

I was so happy to see this headline and this question that I think I actually blurted out loud an OMG yes! Jezebel, on the occasion of Mahmoud Ahmadineajd coming to America is running a poll on whether he is kinda hot. I wouldn't say hot; as I think I've said before I think he's really cute* in an impish Dennis the Menace way, especially with that khaki jacket he always wears, but I was really happy to see I wasn't alone in my strange attraction to
here are the results at 12:15

I really enjoy being an infidel- I'm glad to see I'm not alone :)

but back to our country all of those people who have donated all those millions of dollars to Barack's campaign are beginning to complain and wonder why he's still all those tens of percentage points behind (Probably President) Hillary Clinton**. And there are now wondering if those crowds that Barack brings in will translate into votes (answer: no.) I think I speak for all of those donors when I ask, where's the beef, Barack, where's the beef?


(and yeah I just wanted to use this commercial because it's awesome)
* but no I don't think he's a beefcake"- i just like the parrallellism and alliteration of the title
**p.s. Vote Edwards- he's a real beefcake...policy wise of course.

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Monday, September 10, 2007

Notes On a Sporting Weekend

So I think this weekend was the start of that time of year when it is either a bit of a sports overload, or paradise depending on your perspective, with college football, NFL opening weekend and baseball pennant races. It was weekends like this where I wish I was at Devine's like all day, where the chili is always amazing and the same regulars are always there with their quirks, and I would laugh at the misfortunes of my friends' teams. Great times. So anyway these are a few random thoughts that I accumulated this weekend.

  • Jonathon Broxton, you're not dead to me yet (we're still [barely] in the race) but I am very close to pulling the plug. Not only did you make us lose.To the Giants. Twice. But if we had won those games we could have moved up in the West or at least the Wild Card. That is not okay in the slightest. C'mon Jonathon,we need you. Shake it off, but don't let it happen again.
  • Watching the Auburn/South Florida game (and why is the University of South Florida in Tampa?) when it ended it was close to midnight and I realized something about college life. First when you go to an SEC school you have to dress up to go to a game. Secondly when your team wins a game you go out drinking and celebrating. When they lose you're angry so you stay in and angrily drink, but either way you drink. I miss that, I think.
  • When Bo Schembechler died last year the day before the Michigan/Ohio State game I really thought he loved the Wolverines so much that he died in order to inspire them to victory over their biggest rival which would give them a shot at the national title. I've come to think differently, however. Now I kind of think that Bo allowed the Wolverines to be humbled and embarrassed with their worst season ever, in an attempt to gain entry into heaven. I don't know why exactly St. Peter would want Michigan to suffer but he accepted the Curse of Bo Schembechler. I mean they haven't only not won a game but the losses have been historic. I mean how else can you explain App. St and then losing to Oregon in the worst home loss, since the season before Bo's first season at Michigan. Maybe Bo really didn't curse Michigan (though he probably did), instead maybe he is orchestrating these repeated shamings so Michigan will adapt and come out of it stronger. At least I'll hope so, for next week at least- they cannot lose to the Irish.
  • This doesn't really have anything to do with this weekend specifically, I just thought it was funny. Joe Pa and his wife just recently discovered the show M*A*S*H and have never seen Cheers and are hoping to "discover it soon." Seriously I can't be surprised-it's Joe Pa. He's so old school I would be shocked if he actually had a color t.v.
  • And the whole Rodney Harrison-HGH story has been so brushed over it's sickening. Here's a leading defender on a 3 time Championship team admitting to using a banned substance and you hear about a tenth of the outrage as one hears about Rick Ankiel and his hgh-ness (or about half according to a very quick unscientific google poll) And it's not like it's being shushed because Rodney Harrison is a good guy, he's the dirtiest player in the league.Then what is it? Is the NFL really that bullet proof? (I mean, have you even heard about this?) And yes I do apply a double standard to teams and players I hate as opposed to the clean and upstanding citizens of my favorite sporting clubs. (Also about the Jets game, when Chad got hurt and his back up came in, while I was watching live I just thought the crowd was applauding to offer encouragement to the back up, not to express their delight in an injury, though apparently I think too kindly of people.)
  • On Sunday night football John Madden and Al Michaels were talking about a new official who is in charge of the kicking balls and one of them said something like "they call [this official] Dr. K." To which John responded something like " you know those officials can be women too" Al: " Yeah we would call them Mrs. Dr. K" (and that transcription was very loose and paraphrased. but you get the idea) Guys you do realize women are allowed to be doctors- there are millions of them, and I'm sure there's a female heart surgeon waiting to operate on John if he keeps on eating turduckens. It reminded me of a riddle that I saw on the Cosby Show.
  • The Nextel Cup Chase or whatever is starting soon and I still have no idea how it works. Do the other drivers who aren't in the chase just not race? And so will there be only 12 cars on the track? And speaking of fake playoffs I don't understand- in golf now that Tiger won a match (don't think thats the right term) and Phil has a win as well, they both have to show up this weekend, right?
  • Roger Federer, excuse me, God beat Djokovic Novak which I think is his name (or vice versa maybe-either one works) for the US Open title which everyone knew would happen. Like the sun rising too early and Monday would come too soon after the weekend. I didn't know too much about Novak Djokovic but when I saw him in his semifinal match against Ferrer he reminded me of someone. Then it came to me; he is the total twin of (the great) Lee Melchionni. God Lee was awesome; I miss that kid. But check for yourself


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Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Your Simply Amazing Stuck in My Head Song of the Day

I had a few songs in my head today: Nirvana's Aneurysm which I think I want to save for another day (and to be truthful it hasn't been in my head since like 10 this morning) and then a lot of Weezer songs from the Green Album/Maladroit (or maybe just one in a very long medley; it is surprising how similar a lot of those songs are.)
But the one that stuck most is from an all time favorite Rage Against the Machine, and if they were this angry during the Clinton years it's probably a good thing they disbanded for most of the last 7 years; they probably would have exploded. Anyway your stuck in my head song of the day is Calm Like a Bomb (check the knowledge in the lyrics) from the (f**king sweet) Battle of Los Angeles album and this video is taken from the last live show of their first go round, at the Grand Olympic (they have an amazing website) in Los Angeles and now that I've gotten this second chance I really need to see them live. Otherwise I'm totally the worst l.a. socialist poseur ever

Yeah that shouldn't pump you up too much for sleep; not at all.

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Friday, August 31, 2007

Duke Football: You Heard It Here First

College Football season started last night ( ?!) and watching it and the pregame shot of all the college kids tailgating I realized, seemingly for the first time that I'll never be in college again and in those tailgate situations I'll from now on be a sketchy old fart. It was sort of sad. But of course there are millions of people no longer in college who still enjoy those festivities in those settings so that made me happy. And in honor of that, and the fact the first Duke tailgate of the year (coinciding and competing with the actual game) is tomorrow I thought I should give you my predictions for our season this year. Of course what I'm going to say now may be biased and of course it is, and to be honest I just want us to win a game. But the future is now ( and according to SI there are 19 worse teams then us. #100 with a bullet!) And just to be clear and open I fully expect us to make a bowl game this year ( I don't care if I've thought the same thing for the last three years it's happening now) and, to a lesser degree, once again, I expect "The" Thaddeus Lewis to garner himself a lot of praise and be thought about in the Heisman race for next season. And when it all comes to past just remember who you heard it from first.
Here's the schedule with my predictions in italics

Sat, Sep 1st, 2007 Connecticut (win by 7. god I hate UCONN)
Sat, Sep 8th, 2007 at Virginia (UVA is a lot better than UCONN. We'll be underprepared. I Blame Ted Roof. We lose.)
Sat, Sep 15th, 2007 at Northwestern (win by 10. Northwestern; I'm not impressed)
Sat, Sep 22nd, 2007 at Navy ( their jets are really cool. But we run a guerilla style insurgent type game and we eventually sap their will. Allahu Akbar, that's a win.)
Sat, Sep 29th, 2007 at Miami (win on last second field goal. We should have won last year but we got hosed. This time we shock the world. No probably not. 4 road games in a row is tough, Though don't be surprised if we pull it out.)
Sat, Oct 6th, 2007 Wake Forest ( We should have won last year's game by like 30. We're a year older and we won't have those same mistakes. This is the game that gets Thaddeus national recognition. We win by 14.)
Sat, Oct 13th, 2007 Virginia Tech ( I mean I know I can't root against Va Tech but their team is so dirty and full of cheap shot artist. They are still better then us though. Bastards. We don't win.)
Sat, Oct 27th, 2007 at Florida State (we're this years Wake. They beat FSU last year in Doak Walker, so will we. Winner.)
Sat, Nov 3rd, 2007 Clemson (a classic let down game, though Clemson is no push over. I think Tommy will want revenge for us whupping his Daddy. He gets it. We don't win.)
Sat, Nov 10th, 2007 Georgia Tech ( we beat them a few years back and now they don't have Calvin Johnson. We win and clinch bowl eligibilty.)
Sat, Nov 17th, 2007 at Notre Dame (why did we schedule this game? I feel our team may be overwhelmed by the aura and the environment. We don't win.)
Sat, Nov 24th, 2007 at UNC (win by 4. GTHCGTHC. The Bell belongs with us. And we get into a bowl game. Sweet.)
Final record 7-5 (not including the bowl result.)
There you go people the 2007 Duke Football season in a nutshell.
Get excited people. DUKE FOOTBALL ( wooooooo!!!!!! god I hope we win a game)

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