Ad diction: Bad Howie

I really need to think of a name name for these things.
Anyway Tim, from Tim's Take, and a wonderful facebook/internet friend (who has a blog that is so much better than mine I must hate him for it; i forgot about that) mentioned this in a status a few days back and it was so funny because I had been thinking the exact same thing the first time I saw this commercial and as it has been played incessantly I'm sure you've seen it as well. It's Howie Mandel for Buy.com


Yeah, just like Tim thought that is pretty racy to be playing at basically all hours of the day. But another thing about that commercial that gets to me as I see it 4 or 5 times a day is that fact that Howie is pretty OCD and germophobic and so a) I couldn't imagine him going through someone else's lunch and eating it, and b) and probably more obviously I'm not sure he'd have sex with a stranger in a cubicle during the middle of the day, especially considering how on Deal or No Deal he can't shake the contestant's hands but rather greets them with a pound.

Sigh, the more you know....the more your enjoyment of things decreases...
But in honor of Howie here's his first TV appearance

Oh god; he was zany-ugh. was that ever funny?

This is much much better

Ah! Howie's funny!!! And dirty!!!

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God Made Dirt

and dirt don't hurt. And now it's been scientifically proven

From the New York Times

"...indeed, accumulating evidence strongly suggests that eating dirt is good for you.In studies of what is called the hygiene hypothesis, researchers are concluding that organisms like the millions of bacteria, viruses and especially worms that enter the body along with “dirt” spur the development of a healthy immune system.

“What a child is doing when he puts things in his mouth is allowing his immune response to explore his environment, Not only does this allow for ‘practice’ of immune responses, which will be necessary for protection, but it also plays a critical role in teaching the immature immune response what is best ignored.
...

He said that public health measures like cleaning up contaminated water and food have saved the lives of countless children, but they “also eliminated exposure to many organisms that are probably good for us.”

“Children raised in an ultraclean environment,” he added, “are not being exposed to organisms that help them develop appropriate immune regulatory circuits.

.....

In answer to the question, “Are we too clean?” Dr. Elliott said: “Dirtiness comes with a price. But cleanliness comes with a price, too. We’re not proposing a return to the germ-filled environment of the 1850s. But if we properly understand how organisms in the environment protect us, maybe we can give a vaccine or mimic their effects with some innocuous stimulus.”

Dr. Ruebush, the “Why Dirt Is Good” author, does not suggest a return to filth, either. But she correctly points out that bacteria are everywhere: on us, in us and all around us. Most of these micro-organisms cause no problem, and many, like the ones that normally live in the digestive tract and produce life-sustaining nutrients, are essential to good health.

“The typical human probably harbors some 90 trillion microbes,” she wrote. “The very fact that you have so many microbes of so many different kinds is what keeps you healthy most of the time.”
....
Dr. Weinstock goes even further. “Children should be allowed to go barefoot in the dirt, play in the dirt, and not have to wash their hands when they come in to eat,” he said. He and Dr. Elliott pointed out that children who grow up on farms and are frequently exposed to worms and other organisms from farm animals are much less likely to develop allergies and autoimmune diseases."

You see! Cletus isn't just a slack jawed yokel living in stereotypical hillbilly filth- he's just helping to strengthen his 44 kids' immune systems. Take that Park Avenue!

I knew a girl once who had pica and we would randomly find her with a shoe in her mouth...I wonder what happened to her.

Anywhooo, I try to never use antibacterial soap unless I've been doing something really dirty, because I heard a few years back that bacteria can be good for us and I kinda remembered from high school bio about how those little bacterias being exposed to our body enable our body to build resistances to them and thus make your body stronger in the long run, and I'm all about preparing my body for the coming post-apocalyptic wasteland (without actually having to do something too severe and time consuming)

So in conclusion, eat dirt once in a while. Scientist do, however, still recommend you not eat shit. Sorry Divine (r.i.p.)

Red Hot Chili Peppers- I Like Dirt [song download]
(picture source)

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Depressing News

I don't know what to believe anymore...besides maybe some Scientologists were involved

From a BBC article that suggest “anti-depressants’ ‘little effect’

New generation anti-depressants have little clinical benefit for most patients, research suggests.

A University of Hull team concluded the drugs actively help only a small group of the most severely depressed.

Marjorie Wallace, head of the mental health charity Sane, said that if these results were confirmed they could be "very disturbing".

But the makers of Prozac and Seroxat, two of the commonest anti-depressants, said they disagreed with the findings.

A spokesman for GlaxoSmithKline, which makes Seroxat, said the study only looked at a "small subset of the total data available".

And Eli Lilly, which makes Prozac, said that "extensive scientific and medical experience has demonstrated it is an effective anti-depressant".

The researchers accept many people believe the drugs do work for them, but argue that could be a placebo effect - people feel better simply because they are taking a medication which they think will help them.

In total, the Hull team, who published their findings in the journal PLoS Medicine, reviewed data on 47 clinical trials.

They reviewed published clinical trial data, and unpublished data secured under Freedom of Information legislation.

They focused on drugs which work by increasing levels of the mood controlling chemical serotonin in the brain.

These included fluoxetine (Prozac) and paroxetine (Seroxat), from the class known as Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs), alongside another similar drug called venlafaxine (Efexor) - all commonly prescribed in the UK.

The number of prescriptions for anti-depressants hit a record high of more than 31 million in England in 2006 - even though official guidance stresses they should not be a first line treatment for mild depression.

There were 16.2m prescriptions for SSRIs alone.

The researchers found that the drugs did have a positive impact on people with mild depression - but the effect was no bigger than that achieved by giving patients a sugar-coated "dummy" pill.

People with severe symptoms appeared to gain more clear-cut benefit - but this might be more down to the fact that they were less likely to respond to the placebo pill, rather than to respond positively to the drugs.

Lead researcher Professor Irving Kirsch said: "The difference in improvement between patients taking placebos and patients taking anti-depressants is not very great.

"This means that depressed people can improve without chemical treatments.

"Given these results, there seems little reason to prescribe anti-depressant medication to any but the most severely depressed patients, unless alternative treatments have failed to provide a benefit."

Professor Kirsch said the findings called into question the current system of reporting drug trials.
The National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE) is currently reviewing its guidance on the use of antidepressants.

Marjorie Wallace of Sane commented: "If these results were upheld in further studies, they would be very disturbing.

"The newer anti-depressants were the great hope for the future.... These findings could remove what has been seen as a vital choice for thousands in treating what can be a life-threatening condition."

So either I’ve been falling for basically a placebo, which would totally ruin my ego and psychic self and my belief in reality and that I know my body and throw me into turmoil over whether everything was just in my head and or they are actually working but I’m severely depressed

Either way that’s really depressing
Awesome.

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A Very Interesting Combination

Spinning and karoake.
Hmm, I only do karoake when I'm drunk and I definitely do drink before going to the game. And when I'm working out I like to save my breath for, y'know breathing not singing.
Just seems very bizarre to me


from STLtoday

Not the fitness instructor — it's a recording of Janis Joplin, singing "Piece of My Heart" at the top of her formidable lungs, providing a good beat and plenty of encouragement in the process.

Dutifully, the furiously pedaling cyclers step up the pace, and then they join Joplin for the familiar refrain: "Come on! Come on! Come on!"

So it goes in karaoke cycling class, held Tuesday evenings at the Edward Jones YMCA, 12521 Marine Avenue in Maryland Heights. "Singing is not required, but it makes it more fun and the time flies, especially with peppy songs," says Valerie McCool-Fry, 47, the instructor. "The music changes every week, with everything from songs of the '60s to current music."

The participants, most of them wearing exercise shorts and T-shirts, range in age from 30 to 50-plus. Ten stabilized exercise bikes — one up front for McCool-Fry — are positioned in rows in a room that measures roughly 10 feet by 15 feet. The concrete block walls are painted black, and during the 55-minute class, neon black lights take the place of more conventional ceiling lights. Three large fans oscillate throughout the class.

"This class is the best stress-reducer I've found," says Doris Bohannan of Maryland Heights. She adds that she was introduced to karaoke cycling about five years ago at a spa in Florida. "I said then that I could never do anything like that — it's so intense, and you get so sweaty," Bohannan, 57, recalls with a laugh.

Now she's hooked. For more than two years, Bohannan, the manager of a distribution center for an engineering firm, has made karaoke cycling a regular part of her weekly exercise regimen. "It is intense, and you do get sweaty, but it makes you strong."

McCool-Fry backs up Bohannan's assertion, noting that cycling is "an amazing cardio workout, especially good for the lower body" and is said to burn 750 calories per hour. An article on karaoke cycling on the Weight Watchers website (weightwatchers.com) quotes Cecelia Acevedo, a licensed cycle karaoke instructor based in New York City who points out that "singing during exercise is an easy way to monitor your rate of perceived exertion."

In other words, class participants who can easily sing while pedaling probably are not working hard enough, but people who are panting heavily most likely needed to slow down.

"I don't sing during class. I would rather breathe," says Liz Walker, 40, of St. Charles. Walker works in operations for Edward Jones, and she has enrolled in karaoke cycling classes since they were first offered at the YMCA. "You can't be lazy in this class. Besides, it's fun — and even though I don't sing, I will hum."

Liz Borelli, Walker's classmate, says she always sings. "When I get really tired, it helps to sing, because that takes my mind off the fatigue." Borelli, 42, is a registered nurse with AIG, an insurance company, and lives in Maryland Heights. In addition to karaoke cycling, Borelli takes yoga classes and lifts weights.

Mick Jagger's voice fills the tiny room, crooning "Ruby Tuesday." A voice from the back calls out, "Is that the Beatles?" Her classmates fill her in. Next, as the Stones start "You Can't Always Get What You Want," McCool-Fry makes the words come true when she tells the class to adjust the resistance on their bikes to "riding somewhere between mud and quicksand." The cyclers comply. As the workout increases in intensity, another voice calls out, "We need Prince to get us through this." Everyone laughs.

After McCool-Fry calls for the resistance level to be lowered back to "grass," Jimmy Eat World's "The Middle" starts up. The chorus is apropos: "It just takes some time/little girl you're in the middle of the ride./Everything, everything will be just fine,/everything, everything will be alright, alright."

During the song, McCool-Fry pedals so fast that her legs are a blur, just like in cartoons. If she were airborne instead of on a bike bolted to a stand, she would have covered the distance between Maryland Heights and Creve Coeur in no time.

'AN ENERGIZING CLASS'

Vickie Waller, 50, is the "newbie" in the class. "I've been coming for just three months — though I thought about it for a year before I signed up," she says. A preschool teacher, Waller lives in Creve Coeur. "It's an energizing class, more so than some other exercises. I do sing, unless I don't know the song — or if I'm passing out." Everybody laughs again.

Billy Joel whips through "Movin' Out" and Bruce Springsteen (McCool-Fry's favorite) recalls going down to the river (from "The River"). Near the end of the class, the cyclers are breathing hard, reaching deep for every last drop of energy. When Chaka Khan sings "Tell Me Something Good," this reply is heard: "Like class is over!"

That could actually be kind of fun, though when I'm running I need something with a faster rhythm than any of those songs, but I'm still not sold- spinning kicked my ass enough with singing along...

(via Sporting News Blog)

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Do it for America

Eat, drink smoke and be merry for tomorrow you'll die...which will end up helping America.

According to Slate (and some researchers probably) all of the talk about the obese and smokers causing health care costs to rise are just plain hooey

The first paper, published by a Dutch team in the journal PLoS Medicine, challenges the basic assumption that fat people are more expensive to treat. It's true that if you compare two people of the same age and wealth, one slim and the other obese, you can expect the fatter one to have more chronic diseases like diabetes and hypertension. The fatter patient will also make more visits to the doctor, buy more prescription drugs, and otherwise ring up higher medical bills in a given year.

But this analytical approach—used routinely by Finkelstein and other obesity number crunchers—ignores one important fact: Obese people have shorter life spans. Since the elderly are by far the costliest patients, it's possible that early deaths save taxpayers money in the long run. In fact, fatal diseases almost always return net-cost savings to public health care. Smoking, which causes a host of particularly deadly conditions, turns out to be especially cheap—which is to say, government attempts to curb nicotine addiction have actually cost the United States money

If we somehow figured out a way to "cure" obesity—with a pill, an injection, or a law like the one they're proposing in Mississippi—we'd increase the burden on taxpayers. More people would make it to old age, hastening the Social Security crisis and pushing up the costs of Medicaid. Indeed, the analysis in PLoS Medicine revealed that lifetime health expenditures were highest for healthy-living people of optimum weight.

This chew-and-screw narrative feeds on itself. First, it inflates the numbers by ignoring the real effects of an aging population. Then it promotes bias by supplying phony evidence that heavy people are lazy, useless, and a drag on the nation. This in turn makes anyone who thinks he's a little chubby feel even fatter, which worsens his health and lowers his quality of life. As a result, he spends more money on medical bills and more days at home crying into a bowl of ice cream. And guess what? All of this only increases the cost of obesity!

So eat what you want, smoke when you want enjoy your lives, Sure they may be shorter but they will be fuller and by living and then dying early you'll be performing an almost patriotic duty by showing your love for America is so strong that you would sacrifice yourself in order to keep the tax burden down for us all.

I salute you.

And while you’re at it roll around in something disgusting and savor the germs because apparently germs may help our bodies fight tumors
Germs kill Cancer!

IN the 1890s, a New York surgeon named William Coley tested a radical cancer treatment. He took a hypodermic needle teeming with bacteria and plunged it into the flesh of patients.

After suffering through weeks of chills and fevers, many showed significant regression of their tumors, but even Coley himself could not explain the phenomenon.

today, some scientists think Coley had it right: Germs can teach our bodies how to fight back against tumors. Dr. John Timmerman, a cancer immunotherapy expert at UCLA's Jonsson Cancer Center, says this revolution has produced "the most exciting sets of compounds in cancer immunology."

These scientists have not yet proved their case. But new studies are revealing that certain cancers may be reduced by exposure to disease-causing bacteria and viruses, and pharmaceutical companies are testing anticancer treatments that capitalize on the concept by using bacterial elements to boost the body's natural immunity.

The studies also imply that our cleaner, infection-free lifestyles may be contributing to the rise in certain cancers over the last 50 years, scientists say, because they make the immune system weaker or less mature. Germs cause disease but may also fortify the body, a notion summed up in a 2006 report by a team of Canadian researchers as "whatever does not kill me makes me stronger."

Which is why I don’t use antibacterial soup. I'm sure I'll get something weird one of these days but I want my body to be able to recognize it and kill it.

Swear it off healthy living and precautions people, do it for America

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Pepsi Goes Raw

I'm actually really curious and excited by this news because one of the main reasons I don't drink like soda is because I'm always trying to cut out high fructose corn syrup, which is so so hard because it is like in everything.
From the Mail
Pepsi Raw is said to be made from natural ingredients and contains no artificial preservatives, colours, flavourings or sweeteners.

Traditional Pepsi contains fructose corn syrup, sugar, artificial colourings, phosphoric acid, caffeine, citric acid and natural flavours.
In comparison, Pepsi Raw has only natural ingredients including apple extract, plain caramel colouring, coffee leaf, tantaric acid from grapes, gum arabic from acacia trees, cane sugar and sparkling water. It is paler in colour and less fizzy than other cola brands.

By replacing corn syrup with cane sugar, Pepsi claims it has managed to reduce the calorie content of a 300ml bottle, from around 126 calories per serving to around 117 calories.

Cutting the amount of sugar in the drink could also help prevent damage to teeth.

To begin with, Pepsi Raw will only be available in selected bars and clubs in seven cities - London, Manchester, Glasgow, Brighton, Birmingham, Leeds and Liverpool, although a wider roll-out is expected later in the year.

Ah, another reason to want to be British! Though traveling I have noticed that like in other countries Coke is already made from like actual sugar. But how does it taste (the taste's the thing y'know) well according to this Times of London field piece either- the same, sweeter, "more rubbish" or like it has a bit of scotch in it.
Good to know. Let's work out the kinks over there first.

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Jenny and the Queen

*

So recently I’ve been noticing a lot of those Jenny Craig commercials featuring Queen Latifah where she talks about how “so many people are supporting me in my” trying to lose weight with Jenny and that got me thinking- what exactly does it say that Queen Latifah whose girlfriend (I mean really close friend) Jeanette Jenkins is a personal trainer and fitness expert and yet she’s hawking a different approach to weight loss and claiming that it’s working for her?
(is there trouble in The Queen’s castle?)

I know that not everyone can afford to be dating (I mean be friends with and a client of) a personal trainer and so this is accessible to more people (who can afford $61 a pound! ) but…wouldn’t that maybe perhaps in some people’s minds (like mine) kind of be a criticism of the efficacy of The Hollywood Trainer 21 Day Weight Loss Plan?
I don't know but between Jenny and Jeanette I'd have to go with Jeanette- I mean look how intense and focused she looks


*in case you can't read what the Queen had to say about Jeanette's workout plan here's the text
"I'm very excited that Jeanette decided to put together the Hollywood Trainer series because it will give more people a chance to benefit from her workouts. There are a lot of people out there who want to adopt a healthy lifestyle but they don't know how to do it. Jeanette's program will show them how."
"For me personally, traveling as much as I do, I can't take Jeanette everywhere with me. Now, I can take Jeanette on the road with me in a series of tapes and get the same results that I would get if I was working out in a gym with her."

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Welcome Back Dickie V

The New York Times has a fascinating article today about the recovery of Dick Vitale from his throat surgery with all sorts of things that I never knew. And that was a horrible senence and tease, anyway here it is.

For the past three seasons, as lesions on his vocal cords rendered each “dipsy-do-dunk-a-roo” painful, he tried to focus on the games. But all he could think about, he said, was “my throat — how does it sound? What about my throat? It’s killing me.”

He called his wife, Lorraine, during halftimes so frequently for her opinion about his increasing hoarseness that “it got annoying,” she said.

Vitale needed surgery but tried to duck it briefly by clinging to a diagnosis by specialists in Florida who said acid reflux was a leading cause of his raspy, strained voice.

Even after he agreed to travel to Boston for the operation, he feared that surgery might change his voice, that the lesions would be cancerous and that his second career of being synonymous with college basketball at ESPN, of being Dickie V, would end.

“After 29 years, having a blast, I’d have to go out like this wimp,” he said.

Lorraine Vitale, as calm as her husband is outrageously impassioned, said: “We both had the fear. It was a lot of stress and worry” because his voice “is his whole career.”

Vitale wept with his bosses at ESPN when he thought he might have cancer.

“I cried for three hours straight on the plane coming home,” he said, referring to an evaluation at Massachusetts General Hospital by Dr. Steven M. Zeitels, who said he needed to perform surgery to rule out cancer in the lesions.

But Vitale’s health concerns are fading. He is preparing to call Wednesday night’s Duke-North Carolina game in Chapel Hill, his first broadcast in two months.

The lesions are gone, baby, and they were benign.

Zeitels also infused saline through a specialized needle into Vitale’s vocal-cord tissue to improve the cords’ pliability and the sound they produce when they vibrate.

To shift some of the heavy workload from his vocal cords to his diaphragm, Vitale, 68, is being tutored by a vocal coach.

In his 17,500-square-foot Sarasota estate last Friday, he offered a sampler of his exercises:

“Ko-kay-kee,” he said, standing behind his massive desk. “To-tay-tee. So-say-see. Ro-ray-ree. Lo-lay-lee.” Then, “Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream.”

In his off-key Jersey twang, he sang: “My country ’tis of thee. Sweet land of liberty.”

Later, he sought to demonstrate that despite a buildup of phlegm in the back of his throat (don’t cough, he admonished himself, swallow it), his voice was fit for action; the raspiness was gone, and so was the strain evident in his last game, on Dec. 4.

He tried once but kept clearing his throat. He waited a couple of seconds.

“I can feel it coming back clear again,” he said, then shifted to a faster rhythm.

“Hi, everybody, I’m Dick Vitale,” he said. “Tonight we’ve got North Carolina against Duke. We’ve got the transition game. We’ve got the unbelievable spirit of the Dookies against the Carolina Tar Heels.” He quickly added, “See, I’m ready.”

Vitale said he never believed that he was abusing his voice by calling games, making speeches, doing interviews, taping commercials or simply talking to nearly everybody he met, at his typically passionate, high-decibel volume.

“I just always thought I had this loud way about me, you know, the throat became my sound, whether it was clear or not,” he said. “It’s helped me make my living.”

Zeitels, who had barely heard of Vitale before treating him, said the vocal-cord damage was “commensurate and reflective of his career; nothing out of the ordinary.”

But Vitale could not be certain what would come out of his mouth after surgery.

Zeitels ordered him not to speak for three and a half weeks, accomplishing by medical fiat what his critics have wished he would do for years.

“It was very, very weird,” Lorraine Vitale said. “He was never without his dry erase board. He wrote the way he talks. Very urgently.” She mimicked his impatient gestures as she sat beside him at his daily breakfast spot here, The Broken Egg.

At the restaurant, which sells Vitale’s books and motivational DVDs from a packed display case at the entrance, he posted a sign at his table, apologizing in advance to the many customers who wanted to chat about Michigan or Duke or Florida State.

“I cannot talk,” it read. “I just had throat surgery.”

Vitale slipped only once during his monk’s silence, his wife said.

“He woke up in the morning, came out of a dream and forgot and said, ‘Oh, where’s the —?’ like it was the worst crime in the world,” she said. “I said: ‘Don’t worry, it’s fine. But you know what, I heard your voice. I’m happy and it sounds good.’ ”

He returned to voicelessness until Zeitels said it was safe to speak on Jan. 13.

But Vitale froze. Nothing came out whence verbosity once flowed unimpeded.

“It was like stage fright,” his wife said. “And the doctor said: ‘Count to 10. Just relax.’ ”

Vitale added: “So many people told me after surgery, you don’t know, your voice might change. I was afraid to hear it. I had tears. I was afraid.”

When that familiar trumpet of a voice finally awakened, it sounded healthy again.

“With the emotion of it all, Dick just broke down,” Lorraine Vitale said.

But he had relatively little time to celebrate.

An enlarged prostate required laser surgery four days after Vitale’s speech returned and led him to use a catheter for four days.

Vitale is back to his usual routines now, working out and playing tennis in the morning; planning his annual cancer research fund-raiser to benefit the V Foundation, named for Jim Valvano; recording his ESPN.com podcasts (“It’s time to act 12 again!” he said last week, after a couple of months of acting old); and visiting his daughters, Sherri and Terri, who live in the same planned community with their husbands and children.

Last Friday, he talked to fans (“Hey, you look like a young Lou Holtz!” he said to one) while signing books as he ate his breakfast in a banquette. Later on, he stopped his Mercedes sports car (one of three vehicles he gets in an endorsement deal) on a street near his house to chat with neighbors glad that his voice is healing.

“We were praying for you,” one man said. “When are you back?”

“Wednesday,” he said. “Don’t forget to watch.”

But now that he is back at work, can Vitale preserve his restored voice? Can he back away from a schedule born of a bottomless well of enthusiasm?

“I’m really going to try,” Vitale said. “It’s something I’ve never been good at.”

Dan Steir, an ESPN senior coordinating producer, said: “In retrospect, we’ve learned that we want to make sure we maximize Dick on our big events and be smart about it.”

Zeitels has advised him to avoid doubleheaders (he received the go-ahead only for the Atlantic Coast Conference tournament semifinals next month) and games on back-to-back nights, to speak as little as he can before games and to eliminate doing interviews that are not crucial.

“My guess is if he regulates himself, he’ll be fine for years to come,” said Zeitels, who has treated Julie Andrews and Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler. “His old ways are O.K., just modified. How he uses his voice is part of his charm.”

The intensity of that charm will be quantified at a future ESPN game when Vitale will be connected to a minicomputer that will measure his vocal cords’ vibrations and “provide us with objective metrics of Dick’s extreme vocal performance,” Zeitels said.

Imagine ESPN’s graphics that night: time, score and Dickie V’s vocal vibrations.

It really is good to have you back Dick. And everyone should definitely check out the audio slide show; his voice has come back pretty nicely

(though that ESPN shirt he's wearing is too much like Carolina Blue for my taste)

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Mississippi Considers Restaurant Ban For Obese-Still Probably Hates Black People

From CBS news

A lawmaker in the fattest state in the nation says he wasn't trying to offend anybody by filing a bill that would ban restaurants from serving food to obese customers.

He says he never even expected his plan to become law.

"I was trying to shed a little light on the number one problem in Mississippi," said Republican Rep. John Read of Gautier.

That's an interesting way to go about it.
Anyway here’s the CBS morning show interview with Maggie Rodriguez (who is so adorable and I used to love back when she was an anchorwoman out here on ABC 7 like ten years ago….I’m old.)

There’s probably a better way to bring attention to the problem and if it really is a problem how about changing the way you eat and the food you serve in restaurants.

Not all that comfortable when people try to ban people from establishments just because of their looks especially not in Mississippi. Some (ok maybe me) might even call it a Segregation of the Skinny

(and reading the first comment on that story it did remind me that once again it is a Republican, those proponents of small government, that wants to increase the scope of government far beyond anything the Founders wanted and not only into our bedrooms but our kitchens)

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Good To Know: High heels 'may improve sex life'

just probably not in the way that you're thinking or at least that was the case with me.To be honest the article isn't nearly as alluring as the lede but c'est la vie (and it is really informative!)

From the BBC
Wearing higher heels - although perhaps not stilettos - may improve your pelvic floor muscles and in doing so boost your sex life, a study suggests.

An Italian urologist and self-professed lover of the sexy shoe set out to prove that high heels were not as bad for women's health as some suggest.

The shoe has been linked to a range of problems - from corns to schizophrenia.

But in a letter to European Urology, Dr Maria Cerruto said her research showed it was time to stand up for the heel.

She said her study of 66 women under 50 found that those who held their foot at a 15 degree angle to the ground - the equivalent of a two inch heel - had as good posture as those who wore flat shoes, and crucially showed less electrical activity in their pelvic muscles.

This suggested the muscles were at an optimum position, which could well improve their strength and ability to contract.

The pelvic floor muscles are an essential component of the female body. As well as assisting sexual performance and satisfaction, they provide vital support to the pelvic organs, which include the bladder, bowels and uterus.

But they often weaken after pregnancy and childbirth, and as the woman gets older. There are exercises to strengthen them, but Dr Cerruto hopes her findings may eliminate the need for these.

"Women often have difficulty in carrying out the right exercises for the pelvic zone and wearing heels could be the solution," she said.

"Like many women, I like high-heeled shoes," she added. "It's good to know they have potential health benefits."

Gill Brook, a women's health physiotherapist in Bradford, stressed the findings did not suggest that stilettos were a good thing for those keen on improving their pelvic floor function.

"But for women who like a slightly higher heel, these are reassuring findings - although we haven't yet done away with the need for regular exercises to maintain what is such an important part of the female body."

(in case you were wondering these are pelvic floor exercises and for men as well)

And in related news, wearing heels and crushing things may also improve your sex life with certain members of the population

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The Feel Good Story of the Season

Kevin Everett is both the most tragic and most hopeful best story of the football season. His recovery was chronicled last night on Nightline and I think on GMA this morning and it was a really really powerful program, especially considering the fact that the interview was conducted by Bob Woodruff who has had a “miraculous” recovery of his own. It made me really happy.


Nightline also talked about how doctors “used a controversial treatment on Everett which involved inducing hypothermia and injecting him with steroid” and my only question is why is it controversial and why don’t they use it regularly- I mean after saying he’d never walk again, guess what? He was walking five months later

And no this footage was not featured


(how perfect and how perfectly screwed up was that? And it was synched up so well too)

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C’mon Get [moderately] Happy!!

(just not too happy where you’re free from worry, apparently)

From Slate and an entry titled either "Happiness Sucks" or "Why Joy is Bad For You"

A study suggests extreme happiness may be bad for you. Findings : 1) "The highest levels of income, education and political participation were reported not by the most satisfied individuals, but by moderately satisfied individuals." 2) Extremely happy people "earned significantly less money" and earned lower school grades than moderately happy people. 3) They "may not live as long," either. Theories: 1) Happiness makes you complacent and kills your drive. 2) It makes you slow to adapt. 3) It makes you too optimistic and insufficiently vigilant about your health. 4) It may overstimulate your cardiovascular system. Researchers' conclusions : 1) "Happiness may need to be moderated for success." 2) "Extremely high levels of happiness might not be a desirable goal." Human Nature's conclusions: 1) Success may need to be moderated for happiness. 2) Extremely high levels of success might not be a desirable goal.

Good to know, though I don’t think my pseudo- cyclothymia is the right way to go about it
So I guess everything really should be taken in moderation.
That really is depressing and kind of boring

[Related: Make sure you're actually depressed and not just being given pills because of laziness to make you, moderately, happy. But Scientology is never the way.]

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Liquid Fantasies: Things that are too cool/trendy for me

but I still want to try; once it hits your lips and all...

• I feel I would enjoy trying the new Stiletto Vodka, which is the first entirely female owned "spirit" company. And it's for charity "Stiletto Vodka will also donate 25 cents from each bottle sold to support breast cancer and an additional 25 cents to support the Emeril Lagasse Foundation, which helps fund education for lower income children." drinking for a good cause and fabulousness- I could get behind it. It's in available in a classic vodka flavour as well as chocolate, vanilla and mint.
• The New York Times has published an article about the wonders of $10 or less wine, which is long overdue and greatly appreciated. I usually only spend between 10 and 15 dollars for a bottle and it's worked out well for me
• though I may be behind the curve. They say Boxed Wine is the new bottled wine (although I still prefer my wine to come from a cube)
• but Canned Wine is apparently the new Boxed Wine, which is the new Bottled Wine. Oh it's all so terribly confusing though because Wine Sorbet seems to be the newest of them all, made by Wine Cellar Sorbet. I think I want to the pinot noir or their sangria rojo. If only there was a story west of Appalachia...
  
• Which doesn't really matter now that I have lost any tolerance for alcohol and I think I may be allergic. That might be a good thing though because a new study is reporting that all types of alcohol(beer-spirits and wine) boost the risk for breast cancer which seems horribly unfair. Especially if it could be imagined that one already had a high risk (genetically) they couldn't even drink away that pain.
• But you don't have to drink to have fun at a bar. I am so so happy to find this listing of the best Pub Quizzes in the area. Last year I think my friends and I must have gone to like 3 pub quizzes a week because we were seniors and didn't care about work, we enjoyed drinking plus competition, and I have random freaky info stuck in my brain which worked out quite well. Now if only I could get the band back together; we could rule this town.
  

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Health News, um....Occasionally

(yeah i can't figure out a specific day for these)

• Men's Health recently published an article about 6 Mood Foods that can "help kick your mind into gear." I wouldn't think it would just work for guys so here is what they suggest (you can find the brain chemistry facts in the article):
• If you're anxious eat " Half a grilled-chicken wrap at lunch, hold the mayo"
• Stressed? A handful of sesame seeds while you're working
• Restless? Nonfat popcorn half an hour before you go to bed
• Depressed? Grilled salmon or sushi for dinner
• Insecure? A snack-size chocolate bar
• or if you're Flummoxed (funny word) eat Pineapple chunks for a snack or a cup of berries in your oatmeal
• Though I wonder how anxious, stressed,depressed, insecure or flummoxed (hehe) guys really are. The New York Times has published the results of a study that shows there is a growing happiness gap between men and women with men being much happier in general. One hypothesis for why women, who in a study in the 60s were found to be happier, are now not as content is that now women have much more to do, including working out of the home, but also being primarily responsible for certain household functions and caregiving, being sandwiched by caring for their children as well as their parents, and so with so much more to do than can be done they feel as if their falling short. And it starts much earlier with the pressure to be effortlessly perfect that I know so many of my classmates felt.
• And in a twist that seems totally unfair,in n marital disputes women who keep silent or don't express themselves are much more likely to die of heart disease than those who let out their feelings. So ladies do it with Martha Stewart and just scream for a few seconds, and scream away some frustration. It really helps. Or just don't get married. ugh James Brown is sadly right- It's a Man's World, still (straight man's world)
  
• Or maybe that should be adjusted to It's A (straight) White Man's World (like 2Pac said.) The stress of being a Black man, and the discrimination both real and perceived can lead to a life expectancy that is 6.2 years less than that of white men. In other words the toll of Racism may be physical. In this article you can read about the many contributing factors. It's pretty fucked up.
  
• Videotape has surfaced from an Nambian holiday that shows Prince Harry snorting vodka. I didn't even know that was possible or that people did such things. I can't even imagine the stinging, but I guess if you wanna get really really drunk and are too lazy to swallow this is perfect for you. If you don't care about the potential lethality of such a drinking game. The Royals- they really are different from us.
• But maybe not that different; it seems a lot of Brits are lazy "sods" (i love that word.) A recent British study has shown that only 38% of British adults would exercise more if their lives depended on it. Sounds like they could be Americans- maybe we do share a Special Relationship after all.

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Fun with WebMD

Over the past few days because this damn headache (strange throbbing in my right eye and thereabouts) would not go away I decided to go onto WebMD to indulge my hypochondriac side. And self diagnosis allows me that fun (I try not to go to he doctor anymore than I have to especially because I think I have a fear that if a doctor were to diagnose something it would be official and final, whereas this way I can freak out, moan and wail for my life without actual reason to fear for my life, yada yada.) All with FDR's last words in mind. I went on Symptom Checker and, as always seems to be the case I was stumped on the very first question: Sex.

it's really tricky nowadays!
Anyway after I chose what I felt and put in my symptoms I decided I probably had cluster headaches (or possibly glaucoma.) But what really amused me about the symptom checker is that with the same symptom, a throbbing pain on one side of your head that lasts for hours you can either have a brain aneurysm.... or sunburn. If you crave alcohol that is a sign of cocaine abuse (and all this time I thought it meant I was an alcoholic), or my personal favorite- if you fear air that is a symptom of rabies.
There were a ton of other random ones as well but after a bit I stopped looking- I did (and still do) have that damn headache-it's awesome! (ugh- maybe i should actually get this checked out)

and speaking of problems in the head Slate.com has a rather interesting article hypothesizing that the reason OJ may be OJ (and his erratic behavior) is because of blows to the heads he may have received back when he was just a football player and not a criminal mastermind. I think there may be some connection, considering how people have only recently begun to understood what damage such trauma can do, but.... it took him until 1994, like 15 years after he stopped playing to start exhibiting this psychosis and then another 10 years before he starts robbing people (y'know, if he did it) Of course I'm no expert but maybe soon WebMd will tell me what homicidal behavior is a symptom of.
Oh yeah; Free OJ, blah blah.

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Linkapalooza- Healthy Sciency Type Stuff

If I'm going to make health/science news a weekly feature I really need to think of a name, hopefully nothing that screams of a local tv news segment like In Good Health, or For Your Health. Anyway can't stop the flow.

• I think this totally shows where my mind is when I saw a headline, about the release of new finding, "A Kiss is Still A Kiss, or Is It?" I immediately thought of the twisted tale in the Dresden Dolls' Missed Me instead of Dooley Wilson's As Time Goes By. The study itself shows that kissing can make or break a relationship and that guys kiss as a means to an end (sex) whereas girls do it to establish relationships. Guys are more likely to intiate french kissing (because of some biological thing) and that while girls wouldn't have sex without kissing, guys would gladly take sex without lips touching. Yeah guys are weird.
• Whoever is in charge of such matters has allowed the creation of human animal embryos for research. I'm not sure I'm thinking of the same kind of hybrids but either way only good can come of this. Nope, no chance of this turning out badly.
• I'm all about manipulating genes now that we can. Scientist have not only discovered a skinny gene ( I'll take 6) but also a tall gene. Do you know what this means? Soon the whole world will be populated by Supermodels ( and the third world) or maybe those alien type things from the end of A.I.
• But we don't need gene therapy. You must put time and effort into looking good and living healthy. Thank god there's a 5 minute workout to help you "get fit lift mood and boost confidence". Perfect because 6 minutes is way too long for my attention span.
• Or you can just try the Hoboken Beach Diet. Who knows, it could be the one that works for you. Becaue there are some of us who really need help. God I love the mid west.I don't know if I feel sorry for this kid, now that he's been spread over the internet, I mean it's kind of cruel to mock but wtf? He can't use his hands, y'know, like a person? Wow. There's no way this kid can live this down. I mean if he is still alive and not dead of a heart attack by junior year.
  
  And finally you know the old Guiness advertising campaign "Guiness is Good for You"? Well apparently they weren't lying. Researchers now say a Guiness a day can help prevent heart clots which can cause heart attacks. So drink away- it's good for you. ( I wish it were Harp; Guiness is way too heavy.
  

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And from the "No Shit" Files

Whatever happened to real scientific inquiry? Some of these guys must be really scared of perishing and just want to get anything peer reviewed and published because these really aren't pushing the world forward. All I can guess is it must be really easy to get a scientific grant now a days because these studies and reports that are seemingly released every few days keep getting more and more obvious and pointless. Two of the most recent examples:

Rock Stars are More Likely to Die Young. Really?! Remember Neil Young's Hey Hey My My (it's better to burn out cuz rust never sleeps) or The Who's My Generation (I hope I die before I get old)? You don't get in the business of being a rock star to retire to a cottage. You mean choosing a career that allows you to indulge all of your desires while confronting none of your demons may be harmful? That some rock stars write such great songs because they have severe issues that are never dealt with because those issues sell a lot of records, and in those cases emotionally betterment might lead to a loss of sales. Or that the whole mystique of being a rock star, of sex drugs and more of both isn't the most conducive one to living to 80?(Have you seen The Decline of Western Civilization I or II?) And in both cases, of the melancholy artist or the party boy rock star, the drugs serve as dangerous self medication. But what most disappoints me is that our good old boys whiskey bent and hell bound (North) American Rock stars live seven years longer than the Europeans. Unacceptable. Pete Wentz, or better yet dude from Nickelback Chad Kroeger it's time to take one for the team.

Oh and I've always wondered about it but finally science has answered this pressing and difficult question. Men want hot women. Some of their findings: "The men also appeared to be much less choosy. Men tended to select nearly every woman above a certain minimum attractiveness threshold, Is this seriously what they spend their money on at Indiana?Hey, the University of Indiana; Is that why you kidnapped Megan Richter, Peter Todd, because she was hot? you sick sick bastard.
R.I.P. (probably), Megan

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Things that are too cool/trendy for me

but of course I still want, or want to experience.

• I don't actually own a watch, I think the last time I did was in high school, I've just relied on my cell phone, but maybe I'll change my habits for one of these new Nooka (funny word) watches. They look really cool and "hip" and apparently all the cool kids have them as well.
  
• To drink one of the new Low Alcohol Wines. On second thought, never mind; I'm not nearly that mature and I always enjoy being wine drunk. And I really don't have the time to drink 2 and a half bottles.
• Maybe I'll just drink a Diet Coke instead. Did you know they're 99% water? And water can't be bad for you. Soda is though. bad soda, bad.
• For the new Eye Password technology to become prevalent, because sometimes I really don't want to put forth that effort of pushing numbers, and who knows who all has touched those things. Filthy I'm sure.
• And anyway hands are becoming quite obsolete. Why should I use them when I can just control my iPod with my mouth by clenching and grinding my teeth. It's so convenient and inconspicuous and is a great jaw workout. Hands; like the new tails.
• Though I would need them to workout with the Kettlebell. Apparently they work more muscle groups than any other exercise and the results are fantastic. That's exactly what I need. My body could always be in better shape.Too bad I'm lazy or maybe just sans motivation.
• But with a hat like this no one would even need to look at my body, they'll all be too impressed and jealous from the neck up. My head will blow them away. Headpieces are in for like the first time since the 40's. And they are so pretty (some of them at least) I want one. So classy, retro, feminine and gorgeous. Now I would just need a place to wear one. Time to find a more sophisticated group of friends, and by sophisticated I mean old.
• Then maybe just once in my life this would happen to me. (god, I had forgotten how amazing this movie is)
  

(and no I don't care that Bill Murray's a drunk; he's so romantic and loves American law so much he believes it should override foreign sovereignty. AKA a dreamboat)

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In Good Health

Is that a corny and cliched enough title for a post about health related links that I've found over the past week?

• This is kind of a sad study. A new report suggests that women who have breast enhancement surgeries are 3 times more likely to commit suicide. Maybe its because these women realize that its not their breast size that will take away their low self esteem and feelings of worthlessness. Maybe they have begun to understand happiness can not be found at the point of a surgeon's incision. Maybe they finally realize outer beauty does not equal inner harmony. Maybe they are tired of living to make others happy, but don't know any other way to be. Over 329,000 of these surgeries were performed last year which is a really staggering number; that many women are that unsatisfied with themselves. It's sad really. I blame society.
• Scientists have isolated the gene for left handedness. Finally! now we have the power to rid the Earth of these abominations and unnatural people. Since only about 10% of people are left handed it is obvious that it's not the way man was intended to be. Look at guitars and notebooks or even a manual transmission stick in your car These left handers can change and become normal; it is their choice to continue in that way of being. (did I lay that on a bit too thickly?)
  

• Another study is hypthosizing (sp) that listening to mp3s and other compressed files can change our brain chemistry and "turn you into an observer"

"It could be that mp3s actually reach the receptors in our brains in entirely different ways than analog phonograph records. The difference could be as fundamental as which brain hemisphere the music engages.

"Poorer-fidelity music stimulates the brain in different ways," says Dr. Robert Sweetow, head of UCSF audiology department. "With different neurons, perhaps lesser neurons, stimulated, there are fewer cortical neurons connected back to the limbic system, where the emotions are stored."

Yup I wonder if the record industry possibly funded this story. But if it's true I guess I can get used to the high quality sound of an 8- Track (were they only capable of holding 8 songs?), or maybe I'll just listen to my mom's 45s.

• So many scientific studies in the world. You mean you actually needed a study to show that drinking and smoking causes mouth cancer and that our modern lives are rubbish and increasing the rates of cancer? Here's a quick primer; smoking=bad, drinking too much= bad, stress=bad, too much sun= bad, being fat=bad. There go and live in peace.

• Adult binge drinkers are more likely to choose beer as their "weapon" of choice, while teens prefer the hard stuff. I guess it makes sense because teens always have to worry about getting caught underage and so they want to get fucked up faster, where as adults can take their time. But there is something vaguely romantic about the image of an old alcoholic alone in a bar with a half empty bottle of bourbon in his right hand and a shot glass in his left. Seems so film noirish and cinematic, while a guy drinking beer I just see fat, in a recliner, angry and from a sitcom. Also someone who looks like John Goodman. Something like that. And does this make me immature that I still enjoy shots, and relaxing with a nice jug of some mixed cocktail? Plus beer makes me have to go to the potty too often and is fattening (a wise sage of a woman, far more experienced in alcohol than I, once told me about a friend that always drank diet coke and vodka because it had few calories. It is probably a myth but you gotta believe in something)
• But apparently if you want to lose weight diet foods are the worst for you because they don't fool your body but rather the more low calorie food you consume, a new Canadian study shows, the more your body will demand the missing calorie be made up, thus perpetuating a cycle which can lead to weight gain.Theoretically.
• Don't worry too much about that however, because, according to the New York Times "our fat is doing us a favor." It's storing all of the excess calories and energy that we don't use and puts it away instead of if you didn't have fat tissue and "dumps its energy overruns in that jack-of-all-organs, the liver, causing extreme liver swelling, liver failure and sometimes liver-bearer death." Even so it doesn't address the aesthetic appeal, and the issues with that, and I know I still have a hate hate relationship with mine. But it's still good to know, though I wish I had read that before I started fasting for "spiritual" purposes (god knows that dress is heavenly)
• The New York Times has another article on a trend where women order steaks and hamburgers on dates to show that they don't have issues with food and that they're not high maintenance. The article starts with quite a romantic anecdote, because as I always say all Love should be based around meat, because who doesn't love meat, or something like that. Finally I don't have to feel guilty about ordering a new york strip, what the Times says must be the way it is. No all I have to do is find a nice gentleman (I'd settle for moderate jerk) who wants to take me out (and hopefully wants to wine dine and recline me). Ugh; I guess this is the hard part.

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